My Life With Billie Joe Armstrong (discontinued)

Chapter 6: Only Human

Saddies POV:

Billie had ordered pizza hut, like he said he would. Pepperoni stuffed crust and a side of parmesan chicken. Me and addie talked about my room while he ordered..

"What color walls?" She asked; she had a pen and paper, like they almost wanted me to live with them it would be so perfect. I wouldnt mind being gone longer now that ryan and me were done.....

"Im into deep colors; deep rose pink or plum purple with like...white trim would be good."

"Any decorations?"

"In all honesty, ill probably just hang up band posters, but a body mirror, a bean bag chair, and a few dreamcatchers. Oh and a strip of fairy lights. But i can pay for all of that bec-"

"No honey, we're making it for you. Dont worry about money." She smiled and put a hand on my shoulder, and i smiled back softly. They really wanted me to feel at home, whatever home was to me. As much as i was enjoying myself, i could feel the heartbreak still eating me away. Three years down the drain....all because my friend was a backstabber and my (ex) boyfriend was a cheater. And they'd lied to me for over a year.

After billie ordered, he pulled tre and mike aside and sent them somewhere (i assume this because after pulling then aside for no more than five seconds, they left). Then he sat on the other side of me. I moved, which was rude, but only across from where him and addie were.

"Im sorry to move. I cant be between two people...not when im upset..."

"Sweetie its fine. You two figure everything out?"

"Just about! I just need to know if she prefers curtains, and what color bedset she wants."

"Um...I love curtains, they have to be blackout ones though. And either black or purple for the bed set." She made a few notes and smiled at billie.

"Now i've got everything. I have to be going though, the boys need someone at home to watch them and grandma can only handle them for so long! I love you both, i cant wait to spend girl time with you Saddie." She gave billie a kiss and extended her arms to me; i hugged her and she squeezed me gently.

"It'll all be okay soon, i promise." She whispered it and i tensed; she kissed the top of my head and billie walked her out; i returned to my bunk and lied on my side, pulling my knees to my chest and wrapping my arms around them. Billie returned and he sighed after looking at me.

"Im gonna kick this kids ass." I smirked and shrugged.

"Its whatever, honestly. My best friend betrayed me just as much if not more so." I said softly. He crossed his arms.

"Doesn't matter. She wasn't the one dating you."

"She was a sister to me, dad. I-" I realized what id called him and grew slightly wide eyed; i glanced at him and he was smiling ear to ear. I sighed.

"Anyways. He might've hurt me bad, but she did too. They both went behind my back and betrayed me for over a year."

"You called me dad." I glared instantly. With what just happened to me, he was focused on one comment that I made on accident? 

"Thats your main concern right now, is that I accidentally let it slip out?" i asked, dumbfounded.

"I didn't mean it like that, don't give me attitude just because I got excited." I rolled my eyes slightly and he glared. "And like mike said, at least Im trying to fix what I did. You wont even forgive me." My jaw fell and my heart fell in my chest; I was in shock.

"I apologized so much, and I even told you that Id give you the summer!...How can you say that isn't trying?!" I asked, hurt. Yes, Ill admit it; i was stubborn as fuck in the beginning. But something in my mind told me that, just maybe, it would be great to have a parent who actually cared and got involved with you and your life and cared about you and----

My thoughts were cut off by billie grabbing me gently by my upper arms; his eyes full of worry when he looked into my eyes.

"Saddie whats wrong? Youre crying..." I  Look at him and sighed, turning to the bus doors. I had to get out of there. I couldn't sit there and talk to him. He grabbed my arm and i swiftly turned to glare at him.

"What? What do you possibly need from me since i'm not trying enough for you." I spat the words through my tears and his look softened, but my words stuck.

"Saddie, I-"

"Dont billie. My mom basically abandoned me and now i...I fucked up. Like..." I felt the tears streaming and shook my head, my lip quivering. "Like everything else in this life." I threw my arms lightly and they slapped back against my legs; my head shaking side to side and I sighed as i plopped into my bed in the bus.

"Look, i sent the guys to go get that cat of yours, and-"

"YOURE GETTING MY BABY GI---OH FUCK!" I shot up faster than i was prepared for and my head smacked against the top of the bunk

"Saddie! Are you ok?" I moved before he reached for me and stared at him as i felt a trickle on my forehead.

"I-im fine. Why are you getting my little demon of a cat?"

"Well i know you didnt wanna leave without her or leave her there. So i sent the guys to get her to make you feel more at home. We're gonna have to put a baby gate up at the stairs base so she doesnt get out though, but it'll be manageable." I sighed and wiped the little blood and he handed me some paper towels; i wiped my head and realized it was a small scratch, the damage looked worse than it was.

"So, where i left off; and you dont fuck up, nor are you a fu-"

"Billie listen. You know nothing about my past, about my childhood." I teared up thinking my life over, and sighed looking at him."

"I lived with an alchoholic whore mother who, when i was 7, overdosed and i was home alone for five and a half days. The amount of trauma i have experienced is probably very critical to my mental health." He looked very focused right now and i realized i was full on crying; runny nose, res cheeks, blood shot eyes, stuttering; the works.

"I didnt have a mother. I had a boss. A douche bag, drunk whore of a boss." I pondered on my next words, then shook my head.

"There are things, billie. Things in this world that...no amount of weed or medicine or...or hospital visits can undo. No amount of prayer or science....things you'll never be able to unsee or un-live, for...as long as time goes on." I looked at him and he looked worried now.

"I say im a fuck up because i know what i am. I know who i am. And i dont want you to have to-" The door opened up to the bus and we both looked over, a smile on my face as i saw the maincoon pattern on the cat.

"Havoc!!! My baby!" She meowed and jumped out of mikes hands, pit-patting her way over to me. I smiled as she hopped into my lap.

"Aw, baby miss her mama?" She had instantly layed all curled against me as close as she could be, purring very loudly. I looked up and the guys were all in total shock.

"I told you, shes my baby. Like literally i found her abandon on the side of the road in a box with a bowl of food and a bowl of water. She was barely two weeks old." I paused. "Im all shes ever had."