living

Down

   I feel sad disappointed mad mixed emotions. i feel like he doesn't care. He doesn't care if he goes or not. He doesn't care how much i wanted to see him again. He doesn't care that all i have been thinking this month was to just see him again. He doesn't care And maybe it's just a sadness talking but he doesn't care anymore. He has lost interest. He lost it. I feel like a pile of shit right now. I feel so let downed. I feel very sad. And i don't know what to do i'm trying to think happy thought i'm trying to breath i'm trying to do everything to stop this from escalating but it's all just driving me crazy and i can't stop it. I present you all my anxiety. All these thoughts may not be true all these thoughts i'm having but it's what this book is about. My thoughts and emotions at this moment. Maybe in like ten minutes it may change maybe in like and hour or so it will change but now i just feel like this.