Twisted and Turned. { NashLene }

TAT. [ 13 ]

Alcohol Courage

I was quiet throughout the game after what Nash did. Swerte ko dahil hindi tumutok sa akin ang bote. Para bang iniiwasan ako nito. Nandoon nga ako, pero lumilipad naman ang aking isipan. Nang magsawa na sila kakalaro ay pinagtulungan nilang buhatin si Donny.

"Dahan-dahan naman friends. Gwapo yang buhat-buhat niyo." Paalala ni Julian sa mga nag-alalay kay Donny.

Dahil sa tangkad nito ay nahirapan ang mga kasama namin sa kanya. Malas pa namin dahil malayo ang kwarto ni Donny mula sa entrance.

"Shar, sa kwarto mo na lang kaya si Donny? Hirap na hirap na sila oh." Suhestiyon ni Sofia.

Nasa harapan na kasi kami ng aking silid. Tinignan ko ang mga umaalalay kay Donny. Their faces were contorted and they were soaked in sweat. I heaved a sigh and decided to open my door.

"Sige na nga."

Tinulungan ako nina Sofia at Julian sa paglinis kay Donny. It's a good thing that he's just wearing a t-shirt, it became easy for us to clean him up. May mga buhangin kasing dumikit sa braso at paa nito. He was groaning every time the wet towel touches his skin. Giniginaw siguro ito dahil naka-aircon kami.

"Malapit na Donny, makakatulog ka rin ng mahimbing." Ani Sofia sa tulog na higante.

Napasinghap ako nang bigla nitong hinawakan ang kamay kong abala sa pagkuskos sa braso nito. Napatigil ako sa kanyang ginawa.

"Shar..." he murmured.

"Jusko, hanggang sa pagtulog ikaw pa rin ang nasa isip niya Sharlene!" Julian exclaimed.

I held Donny's hand, "Yes?" Malumanay kong tanong rito.

He smiled upon hearing my voice. His eyes slowly fluttered open, "Shar..." tawag niya muli.

Umupo ako sa kama, "Ano yun, Donny?"

Nasa gilid naman sina Julian at Sofia nagsisikuhan sa kilig.

He stared at me and held my hand tightly, as if scared that I might leave his side.

"Akin ka lang ha?" His eyes were pleading.

Bumilis ang tibok ng aking puso sa narinig. Napatanga ako sa biglaan nitong tanong. Napatili naman ang dalawa sa narinig. He tugged on my palm, urging me to respond. I eyed the two and they were aggressively bobbing their heads. I turned my gaze to Donny who was waiting for my answer. Will he remember this tomorrow?

"Hmm..." I nodded.

His face lit up, "Thank you..." and in a blink of an eye, he was asleep once again.

I tossed and turned in my bed, hoping that maybe I'll feel drowsy. Tinignan ko ang orasan sa haligi. Alas dos na pala ng umaga, pero heto pa rin ako gising na gising.

Bumangon ako sa kama at nagdesisyong magpahangin na lamang sa veranda. My conscience is eating me whole. Oo, wala kaming pormal na relasyon ni Donny. But we are kind of committed to each other and that commitment entails faithfulness. Alam ko ring kusang loob na ginawa iyon ni Nash. I didn't coerce him or anything but the fact that I allowed him to kiss me makes me accountable too. May kasalanan din ako kay Donny. It's like I cheated on him if we were in a relationship.

Why is this happening to me? Maayos na sana lahat eh. I am better off with Donny. But Nash was like nah, I should be in the picture again and casually fucked with my feelings. Hindi naman ata platonic yung halik niya. Do you kiss your friend on the sides of her lips? Hindi diba?

Then what? Imposible ring may nararamdaman ito para sa akin. He has a girlfriend for fuck's sake! Nash isn't a fuckboy too. Porke ba nagkakalabuan na sila ni Alexa, he can kiss any girl he likes? Nash is far better than that.