Alpha Donovan

Chapter Three|Guilt

@twinklingstylinson as Bebe/Beatrice

Donovan's P.O.V

I gripped my hair in my hands, seconds away from ripping it all out. I had hurt her in more ways then one and now I was hiding in my office like a coward. I sighed and looked at my desk, littered with papers about peace treaties with other packs and such. I glanced at the clock on my laptop and cringed slightly. It was 10 o'clock at night. I had left her alone for eight hours in the room and I imagine she probably stayed there. She doesn't know this place, but she knows the bedroom now, so she probably spent the whole time in there. Thinking about how I pushed her into the wall makes me clench my fist. I hurt her. I hurt my Mate and left her crying on the floor. I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't hear Bebe come in. I lifted my head when she let out an exasperated sigh.

"Are you just gonna keep throwing papers on this desk for me to clean?" She placed her hands on her hips and I almost smiled. Bebe was one of the only people I could semi-open up to. "Hullooo?! Are you even listening to me?!" She threw her feather duster at my face and laughed. "Why so gloom and doom? Is my sister trying to suck you off again?" I folded my hands and took in a deep breath.

"I found my Mate, Beatrice."

"Oh...damn."

"Yeah."

"Wow, that's rare. Is she here?"

I paused before continuing. "She is."

"Does my sister know who she is? Has she seen her?"

"She's seen her."

"But?"

"She doesn't know." Her eyes widened.

"Are you serious?!"

"I-I kissed her..."

"Your Mate?"

"Tracy..."

"Don!"

"In front of her..."

"DONOVAN!"

"Don't raise your voice at me!" I growled and she sunk back. "You know that I can't be a Mate, Beatrice." She clenched her jaw and just stared at me. "You know how dangerous it would be for me to have feelings for her."

She scoffed lightly and shook her head, turning to walk away. Before she walked out of the door, she looked over her shoulder at me. "You already do."And she walked out. I clenched my fist, the anger building up inside of me. I stood up and sped to the training room, ripping open my locker for my gym clothes and going straight to the punching bag. I didn't even bother to put gloves on, I was so too stressed. I went to work, pounding the sand bag.

"And this is my most prized jewel, Serenity."

"The she-wolf, Serenity."

"She is a pure."

My Mate

"Serenity? Look at me."

Serenity.

Serenity.

Serenity.

Her eyes.

Her soft hair.

Her luscious  curves.

Her beautiful voice.

Serenity.

Serenity.

Serenity.

I heard a crack and felt my hand start throbbing. I looked down to see my knuckles bloody and I knew they were broken. I sighed and shook my head, walking to the medical center. They would heal in a few hours, but they did sting a bit. I returned to my office and waited until my knuckles healed. It was midnight before I made my way back to the bedroom. I surprised myself by taking her there; no other she-wolf had ever been there.

I opened the door and it was pitch black. I let my wolf rise and felt my eyes adjust to the darkness. With my wolf on the surface, my emotions were also present and I almost whimpered when I saw her. She was exactly where I left her. She was curled up in a ball on the hard wood floor, asleep. As I approached her I could see her tear stain cheeks as well as the redness to her face. She had been crying for many hours before I arrived. I took her up in my arms, feeling my soul become complete as she molded into my body, sighing in content. I brushed her hair away from her face and was very tempted to kiss her plump, pink lips, but I resisted.

I laid her down on the left side of the bed, pulling the covers over her fragile body. I hoped it would warm her skin; she was immensely cold. I took a short shower and came out in only my boxers, smiling when I saw her hugging my pillow. I climbed in and replaced the pillow with my chest and I felt my heart flutter when she grinned in her sleep. Only she could make me feel this way...feel. I was feeling for this she-wolf. I wrapped my arms around her thin waist and made a mental note to tell the cook to cook her a big breakfast. Serenity was severely underfed and I wanted to change that. She needed to be healthy and happy.

Happy.

Could I make her happy? Would I?

I was pulled out of my thoughts when she snuggled into my chest, wrapping her arms around me. The Mate bond was strong and I couldn't deny it for long, but I was just so confused. I had been raised to be feared and not to feel for anyone and now...all that teaching was being f*cked over by one woman. I would have to give in at some point, but I just couldn't right now. Not yet.

I gazed down at her beautiful face and stared at it in longing. How could someone so innocent be mated to me? I decided not to dwell on any of those thoughts tonight and to just enjoy having her with me. Before I knew it, my eyes were dropping and I fell into the deepest, most undisturbed, sleep in years.