Alpha Donovan

Chapter Sixteen|Grief

This will be a little short with a note at the end.

Serenity's P.O.V

It had been two weeks since the funeral and I was still as shaken as I was the day of. I hadn't taken anymore lessons on being a Luna, but rather just stayed in my bedroom. Beatrice and Bianca's faces haunted my mind day and night. I hadn't eaten much and Donovan hadn't slept in our room at all, choosing to stay in his office.

I was completely alone.

Currently, I was sitting on our bed, looking out the window. The sun mocked me with its shining rays, the wind begging me to free myself to air again, but I didn't budge. The door opened and I expected to smell Millie's scent (she took on the position to be my personal maid), but instead smelt my Mate. My body automatically tensed and he sighed setting down a metal tray of food.

"Millie says you haven't been eating."

"I have."

"Serenity-"

"Don't," I interrupted, "Why do you suddenly pretend to care after two weeks?"

"I've always cared."

"Two weeks," I whispered, "Two f*cking weeks and not a peep from you. No checking in, no making sure I'm eating, not a thing. Do you think I wasn't effected or something?"

"I don't know! I don't know, okay! Yes, I was being a selfish d!ck and hiding in my office so I wouldn't have to face you because I knew you'd be upset and I knew that I wold have to be strong for you, but I didn't want to be and I just-" I cut him off with a smack to his face. He stumbled back in shock upon looking at my seething face.

"How dare you?! I am your mate and you think I would judge you if you shed a tear for your friend?! I could never! You are a delusional b*stard!" I threw the tray at him, food flying everywhere. "Get out." I turned and looked out the window. I heard him pick up the tray and its spilt items, leaving without a word more. I sighed in relief when he left only for the tension to return when he did. He wrapped his arms around me and, against my better judgement, my body relaxed. "I thought I told you to leave."

"I think I've left you alone long enough. I won't anymore." His words touched my heart and I sighed, leaning into his chest. "I missed you," he whispered, nuzzling my neck. "I'm so sorry."

"I am too. I shouldn't have yelled at you." 

"I deserved it." 

"No."

"I love you."

"I love you too." 

We made ourselves ready for bed, changing into our pajamas and climbing under the covers. Donovan put his arm around me and inhaled my scent. He kissed my cheek and tightened his arms around me. "Baby?"

"Hm?"

"When...When can we have a pup?" 

I felt my eyes widen at his question. "Uh. What?"

"A pup. I want a pup."

"Of course you do," I rolled my eyes. 

"I'm serious, Serenity, I want children with you."

"Donovan, I don't think now is the best time, we're both very emotional right now." 

"But soon?"

"Maybe."

I closed my eyes and let myself dream of what having a family with Donovan would be like. I hadn't really thought about it until now and it was nice. Our children playing in the backyard as Donovan grilled burgers and played catch with the boys while I set the table with the girls. Life looked perfect. A moment of long silence passed between us before he spoke again.

"Serenity?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?"

I didn't want to lie to him, but at the same time I had no idea what the truth was! Was I ready for a baby? Were we ready as a couple? "I..don't really know actually." 

"Does it have something to do with a baby?"

"Well, yes." 

"I'm sorry if I upset you."

"You didn't. I just don't know if I'm ready, I mean I may ruin my child's life on accident!" 

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold it. Number one, I think we're both ready as a couple together. Neither one of us is going to do this alone, so count on me being supportive. Number two, we aren't just having one pup, so if you mess up we can just start again," he shrugged. I chuckled and hit him with a pillow before snuggling into his side. 

"You're a weirdo."

"Don't pretend like you don't like it." I rolled my eyes and he kissed my forehead. "Go to sleep and we'll talk about it later. The pack misses their Luna and I missed my mate." I smiled and cuddled closer to him, sighing in content as I closed my eyes. 

Maybe we were ready.

But there was still the nagging grief of losing Beatrice and the shock of seeing her sister, Bianca as a spirit. I decided not to tell anyone for fear of them shunning me. The poor luna has gone loony. No way. I felt sleep claw at my brain's doors and I gladly let it in. 

I'm so sorry that I haven't updated in so long! I know you've all probably gotten tired of my apologies, but it's whatever. Hope you enjoyed this one and thank you all so much for 900 followers! It's super exciting!