The Anomaly Affliction

Nine

Trigger warning: injections

"Hello, Violet. My name is Doctor Quinn, and I'm going to be overseeing your SentiVaccines today. Are you familiar with how the SentiVaccines work?"

The doctor starts talking as soon as he shuts the door behind me. People do like to talk, don't they? But no one likes to listen.

"Um...not really," I reply.

Doctor Quinn smiles. "That's okay. First we'll sit you down, make sure you're comfortable, and then you'll be given an IV drip to immunise you against the first of the four negative emotions."

"We?" I ask. "Are there more doctors?"

"There will be two nurses giving you the vaccinations. I will be overseeing the process from that room over there."

He points to a small room with a window looking into the vaccination room. It's only then that I get a proper look at the room I'm in. Everything is either white or silver and looks squeaky clean - apart from the black leather seat in the middle of the room resembling a dental chair, which looks like it has been overused. The lights are bright and the ceiling is high, and all around the room are medical instruments that I've never seen before. When I see the two nurses enter the room I get a sinking feeling in my stomach. There's one man and one woman. The man is broad with neat black hair, grey trousers and a white lab coat. The woman is slim with blond hair in a bun, black stilettos and a white lab coat the same as the male nurses. The people in this room are not like any doctors or nurses I've seen before. The doctor is not like the one who diagnosed me with depression, and he and the nurses are not like the ones who saved my life after I tried to end it. Are they specialist doctors and nurses from the Yellow District? I have no idea. What I do know is that they give me a sudden rush of anxiety, and I want to get out of here.

I want to get out of here.

"...started right away."

I look back at Doctor Quinn and realise that I wasn't listening to a word that he just said.

"S-sorry, what was that?" I ask, having to force the words out my mouth because of this horrible feeling in my stomach.

Doctor Quinn smiles. Again. "I said, if you'd like to take a seat in that chair over there, we'll get you started right away."

He gestures to the black leather seat.

"Oh," I say. "Right."

As I slowly make my way over to the seat, my anxiety increases. With each step I take, my stomach feels worse and my heartbeat gets more rapid. I can't shake this feeling. I want to get out of here.

I want to get out of here.

"Okay Violet," Doctor Quinn says. I hear his voice through a monitor on the wall above the window separating this room from the other room. And I see him standing there, on the other side of the glass, speaking into a microphone. When did he get there? I must've been too caught up in my anxiety to notice him leaving the room.

At that moment I notice a door on the wall to the left of me, opposite the door to the waiting room. Where does that lead? Why am I even curious? I'm probably just trying to distract myself from this gut-wrenching feeling. But it's not working.

"Are you sitting comfortably?" asks Doctor Quinn.

I want to get out of here.

But I can't get out of here. There's no going back. It's too late.

"Yeah," I manage to say, my voice wobbling.

"Good. Just be aware that after all of your vaccinations have been completed, you may feel slightly drowsy for the rest of the day. That's completely normal, it's just your body adjusting."

My heart feels like it's trying to burst out of my chest.

"We're going to give you the IV drip now. This will take two minutes."

Relax, Violet. Fucking relax.

But I can't relax. The two nurses are coming towards me now. One of them is bringing the IV drip over. How can I relax? I need a distraction. What distraction? Lake. I need to think of Lake.

I close my eyes.

Lake's arms are around me. I'm resting my head on her chest. I can feel her heartbeat. It's slow and gentle. I breathe in. She smells of cinnamon. Breathe out. She kisses my head and strokes my hair. She says softly in my ear: "I love you."

I open my eyes.

There is now a strange thing in my left arm. I don't know what it is, but my arm is tingling. My heart no longer feels like it's going to explode. This is fine. This is good. I'm okay.

Wait.

I look down at my arm, then at the doctors around me, then at the IV drip, and it's like I can see my humanity oozing out of me. I look at my reflection in the glass opposite me and it's like I'm looking at Mum. Or Dad. Or anyone else who has been vaccinated. I see a plastered on face, a mask of happiness, and I hate it. I hate it. I see a fake version of myself. I see a future me that I do not want.

This is not good.

I peer down at the strange thing in my arm. Two minutes, Doctor Quinn said. It's probably more like one minute now. Or a minute and a half. I don't know.

What I do know is: I do not want to end up like Mum.

Without thinking, I yank the strange thing out of my arm and jump out of the seat.