breathe me (e.dolan)

six

"I never told you this, but you would never really believe the time I finally realized I liked you.

We were 15, just short of a year after we first met, and we were sitting in your room after school, trying to do homework but not really being able to focus. Mostly, I couldn't focus because that particular day your eyes just seemed more green than usual, your smile more welcoming.

I opened my mouth to ask about something homework related, to force my brain to focus, and that's when Grayson came in. He was grumpy and he seemed out of sorts, and I just watched him as he went to your guys' closet, grabbed a sweater, and walked out. I never did figure out why he was so mad, but I watched him, thinking that I'd never seen him with anything less than a smile on his face. And then from behind me I heard you say, "Only my brother could attract that much attention from a girl without even saying a word." That's when I knew.

It wasn't like a lightbulb went off or anything; I think somewhere deep inside, I always kind of knew. But you said that and I just thought to myself, "How can Ethan say that? How can he not know that no matter what room he's in, he's always the most beautiful person in it? And that when I stare at him while he talks, I struggle to focus on his words because I'm always wondering how someone could be that perfect." I knew it then, E. And I still think that about you to this day.

I love you."