This... can NOT be happening

Stuck on the bus 2.0

I have no idea where I'm going with this chapter, or this story really at all. Sorry if this chapter sucks, also let me know if it does I want feed back.

Shawn's pov:
Wh-what the fuck just happened?!? Today felt so long yet those few moments flew by so quickly. One minute I'm yelling the next we're making out, then he's gone. "What up dude I gotch yo SKITTLES" Matt yells walking into the room, I look up at him from where I'm sitting on the bed
"what?". I throughs something at me,
"skittles" he smiles
"oh yeah right, sorry... it's just.... thanks" I mutter
"are you okay?".
That was a good question was I okay? I was in shock obviously but i don't think it was the bad kind of being in shock. "I think so?" I say "what's that supposed to mean?" Matt asks. I tell him the story of what happened when he wasn't in the room
"damn jack so did bit stick to the plan" he rolls his eyes. Wait what?
"huh?" Matt laughs a little,
"jack has feelings for you too," He chuckle then continues "and feelings is putting it lightly. After the show he came and found me because he felt so bad about what happened today. We came up with this whole plan for him to tell you about his feelings, that's why he had the key to our room. But he obviously didn't stick to that plan seeing as talking to you tonight was not a part of that plan."
"Oh my god Matt, would you quite meddling in my love life" I laugh and shove him off the bed. We talk for a little while longer, mostly making fun of each other, before we decide to go to bed.
-
This morning I woke up feeling good, last night was very confusing but it was also amazing. I thought about talking to jack before we leave but I figured I'd just talk to him on the bus.
"Matt?" I whisper, no response "Matt?" I say much louder than before.
"what?" He sounds grumpy
"We have to go get on the bus" I say rolling out of bed. Matt rolls his eyes and finally gets out of bed.
"Fine I'm up" Matt sticks his tongue out and laughs before grabbing his bags and walking out the door. I laugh too and follow him out, We meet up with the other guys in the lobby when we get downstairs. I look over at jack and  I saw him staring at me, he blushes and looks away immediately.
When we get on the bus me and Matt sit in the middle, the jacks in the very back, and almost all the guys at the very front like always.
"So last stop on this part of the tour, are you exited?" Matt says turning to me
"I'm kinda sad, I mean what am I supposed to do for the next couple months until the shows start up again?"
"Oh please Shawn Mendes doesn't know what he's going to do? Your gonna sing become famous and kick ass" I laugh,
"okay sure I'll do that". We continue to talk for a while until I remember the plan I had "oh hey I'll be right back" I say getting up. I walk to the back of the bus and stand next to the jacks,
"hey Mendes what up?" Johnson says
"hey, I was just wondering if I could talk to Gilinsky for a minute"
"Yeah totally" he says but doesn't move,
"I mean ALONE" I laugh. He gets up laughing and walks closer towards the front of the bus with the others, I roll my eyes and sit down "sooooo" Gilinsky says.
"Soooo" I respond,
"so, what do you want?" Jack laughs
"I just wanted to talk to you, is that so much to ask?" I smirk. This is hell of a lot more awkward than I thought it was going to be.
He looked up me with his cute boyish smile "okay then talk" sometimes I forget how adorable he is.
"First off, I want to apologize about last night, I shouldn't have blown up on you. It's just your such a tease and it's crazy annoying" he's eyes slightly widened and he tried to hide a  smile. "Oh I'm a tease, " he put his hand up to his chest like he's offended
"your the one who acts like you love me then you act like you hate me."
"I do not," I start to think about it "okay actually I totally do, I'm sorry" I laugh. Jack laughs too
"see you admit it, your clearly the bigger tease" i shake my head
"No, your the the one who keeps kissing me at random times" I raise my eyebrows and smile
"Not random times, okay the first time was half your fault too and last night was more romantic than random" he defends, we both laugh.
"Okay I guess that's true, but it still makes you a huge tease. I mean you yell, make me cry, ask me who I like, kiss me, and overall confuse the he'll out of me. I mean I'm pretty sure you're the definition of a tease."
Jack rolls his eyes "oh come on you wanted me to kiss you last night, so don't bring it up like it was out of the blue. Plus we both know you kissed back" he says. He was right I did kiss him back and I did want him to kiss me but I also don't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that.
"Haha, yeah right" I say jokingly and push his arm, he kinda laughs than looks up at me with big doe eyes. We both lean in until we almost kiss, then... he pulls away.
"Hah see you totally wanna kiss me" he laughs
"Ugh your such a dick" I roll my eyes and start to stand
"Wait, Shawn I was kidding" jack grabs my arm, oh my god he's 👏🏻such👏🏻a👏🏻god👏🏻damn 👏🏻tease.
"No I get it," I start laughing almost hysterically before I continue "i don't know what I thought, I thought maybe since you knew how I felt and we kissed that I don't know we were gonna end up together or something. That's funny it really is when you think about, I  don't know why I thought that"
"Shawn..." he starts
"I have to go matt's waiting for me to come back, we'll talk later okay?" I say still smiling to make this exit less like me being a drama queen and more light hearted and fun.
I don't know why I always get angry (not that I am right now) and storm off, and I don't know why jack and me always blow up on each other. It's weird, things are different when I'm around him, different good but different. I get jealous, and upset, and angry all at once, I don't know why? I mean I've never been in love before so I don't know how it's suppose to feel. Am I supposed to be this emotional about every little thing? Cause that's how I feel.
"So how was your talk?" Matt asks me when I sit down,
"Good up until the end there" I reply
"Why's that?"
"Because I'm an idiot sometimes," I half joke before continuing
"I thought for some reason him kissing me last night was like some sign we were gonna end up together and that he liked me back. But I think it was him knowing I was in love with him and just a way to shut me up." I sigh
"But no that doesn't make any sense, the whole reason he went to talk to you was because he said he was in love with you too. What happened over there that makes you think that?" I tell him the story of every thing that happened (a/n I just don't wanna type out The whole thing that happened sorry)
"Dude I think he was just teasing you, not making fun of you"
I obviously know that I'm just a petty annoying drama queen, I pull out my phone and find jacks contact in it.
Shawn to jack: hey sorry about just now
Jack to Shawn: it's fine, we both have a lot of those moments where we get mad, storm off, then apologized.
Shawn to jack: I know right ! What's up with that?😂
Jack to Shawn : I don't know but we do it like a lot, over the littlest of things
Shawn to jack: haha yeah, I just wanted to make sure you didn't think I was a drama queen or something like that
Jack to Shawn: oh I already do think your a drama queen but it's not because of that😂
Shawn to jack: oh screw you😂😂
Shawn to jack: but we're good?
Jack to Shawn: of course
Shawn to jack: good, see you when we get off the bus bye kid
Jack to Shawn:I'm older than you😂
Shawn to jack: good byyye😂
Jack to Shawn: see you later bye 😂
We get off the bus about an hour later in D.C. where our last performance is. All the guys split off to go to there separate rooms until it was just me, the jacks and Matt.
"Me and Johnson need to go do.. something... soo... bye!" Matt says laughing uncontrollably as him and JJ run a way quickly
"That was weird" Gilinsky states as we walk towards the elevator
"Aren't they always weird though?" I ask
"Well that's true" we both laugh
We get into the elevator and hit 6 the floor number we were staying on. There was a silence in the elevator for a while until jack turns to me and kisses me hard. I was confused at first, like I always am when Gilinsky kisses me, but then I kiss him back. When we reach the floor we break away and he drags me out of the elevator. When we get to the room he puts he hands on either so of me on the wall behind me, pinning me there.
"I wanted to that the whole time we were talking on the bus, I wanted to that the whole time I've known you, I'm just sorry I didn't do it sooner than last night. It's all I ever think about, and it's almost impossible to be around you because of that. That's why Im a tease, that's why I get angry and explode, it's because all I ever want to do is kiss you. But I know that I can't" He says barely breathing between each word, then he just walks to his room not saying another word.

Hope y'all loved it but sorry if it sucked ass, Also Soo sorry it took so long to write. I'm having trouble coming up with things to write, if you have any suggestions or comments please let me know. Thanks y'all love ya