Glee: A Brand New Direction (first book of Glee series)

Chapter 33: Hissy Fit

The journey to regionals was hectic. We couldn't decide what songs we would be singing, who would be singing them, or even what we'd be wearing. We had come up with different numbers, thanks to Mercedes, Kurt, and Mike, but we just had too many options.

"It's pretty obvious," said Mercedes when we met to discuss the final choices the week of Regionals. "Marley, Blaine, and Jake should take the leads."

"And what if some of us aren't okay with that?" asked Kitty.

"Yeah, what if she faints again?" asked Tina.

"I thought we'd let that go..." mumbled Jake.

"Rory isn't going to make it to Regionals," said Mr. Schue, "so we may need to change up the number if we go with 'Long Live.'" 

"Then let's not do that song," said Kurt. "Nobody ever wins using Taylor Swift anyway." And then the group bickering began. I missed having Finn around. But he was off trying to do the college thing now and couldn't give us the advice we urgently needed. He was always the voice that knew how to compromise and right now we were dealing with the sass of every diva in the room. All at once.

"Since I'm a senior, I think it's only fair that--" Blaine was saying.

"You get lead?" asked Tina. "You aren't the only senior in the room. And might I remind you that you haven't even been a part of this school as long as the rest of us?"

"Can we just stop the arguing?" said Sam, getting everyone to stop talking. "Look, we have a lot of strong vocals here. So how about we do a girl number, a guy number, and a group number. No spotlighting anyone. No Rachel Berry's, no Finn Hudson's, no Santana's, no Mercedes'. Just New Directions."

"Thanks Sam," said Mr. Schue. "Now, since Regionals will be here, we have to be intense. We are dealing with some tough competition." He led us in an emotional speech and an applause for Rachel, who was having her final callback for Funny Girl. We were all so anxious for her, but the current dilemma brought us back to worrying about Regionals.

On my way to our morning meeting the next day, Sam and Blaine appeared to be having an argument. I assumed it was about the solos for Regionals so I didn't bother listening in. Instead, I headed to the choir room and took my usual seat next to Ryder. Sugar and Joe made it in late and Mr. Schue announced that the girl number would be Icona Pop's "I Love It" and the guy number would be "Hall of Fame" by the Script just as Brittany walked in with her suitcase.

She demanded to sing "My Cup" which she apparently wrote. From what she sang of it, it was... odd. She went on to say that the only way to polish whatever "turd of a song" we'd be doing as a group-- still unannounced-- would be with her "angelic alto voice... as a solo." 

We were all very confused. She went on to claim she was the best one in the room and, as if that weren't enough, insult everyone: "Blaine, Kitty, and Julie, you're all shorter than your average lawn gnome. Joe, you look like a Yucatan Spider Monkey. Sugar, you sound like the noise chalkboards make when you dig your nails into them. Jake, your race is confusing. Tina is just, it's just, you're Tina--"

At this point, Kitty was about to rebut but Sam stepped in. "Ok, I love you," he began. Ouch. "But you're really out of line." She began texting while he talked, which he called her out for. Then his own phone beeped so he pulled it out. "Did you seriously just break up with me? Via text?"

"I was fascinated by your lips," she told him, "but you're clearly in love with Julie and frankly, I miss my sweet lady kisses. Sorry not sorry. Moving on. I want all the solos from now on." With that, she left the room.

"Well, somebody better put that girl in her place before I--" Kitty started. But the bell rang and she didn't finish her sentence. We found out that that wasn't the end of Brittany's lashing out when she set her Cheerios uniform on fire.

***

After school, we met up again to go over the division of lines for each song and finally decide on the final number. 

"Alright, so for Icona Pop, we will be giving lead to Marley," Mr. Schue began. "Unique will get the second--"

"I'm sorry, Mr. Schue," said Ryder as he interrupted. "I hate to pull a Brittany but I don't think Marley should be singing the song."

"What?" Marley mumbled.

"You want the lead in the girl number?" said Tina.

"Dude--" Jake began.

"Hear me out," Ryder continued. "We haven't really been paying attention to two great members of the female population in glee club since the musical. Julie and Kitty deserve to have their shining moments, too."

"Amen," said Kitty.

"Ryder, don't--" I started.

"He's right," said Jake, to everyone's surprise. "Not to say that Marley doesn't deserve the solo. But this is supposed to be about New Directions, as Sam had suggested. So everyone should be equally represented when dividing the lines. Like we did for the guys."

"Alright, agreed," said Mr. Schue. And we made the changes to the song accordingly. When I was at home, Ryder called me up on Skype.

"Hey!" I exclaimed when I answered.

"Are you watching Brittany's webshow?" he said excitedly.

"Um, no, why?" I said. 

"Put it on!" he exclaimed. I did as he said. Brittany was questioning Coach Sylvester about the father of her baby. We watched it together and laughed at the ridiculous interview.

"What is up with Brittany lately?" I asked once it was over.

"I wasn't going to say anything," said Ryder. "But Tina says Sam told her he was still into you."

"No way..." I murmured.

"And then she got into MIT," he went on. "And a switch was just flipped in her brain."

"That one I buy," I said. "How did she turn out to be a genius?"

"People can surprise you," he said with a smile. "Alright, I have to go finish up my homework now. I'll see you at school. Bye Julie!" The screen went black and I closed down my laptop.

"I thought he hated you," said Cory from the doorway.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, tossing a pillow at him.

"I just came to say goodnight," he laughed as he caught it. He threw it back on my bed.

"Did Dad leave already?" I asked.

"Yup!" he said. "This does not mean you get to invite Ryder into your bedroom, young lady!" I made a face at him and he laughed. "Anyway, I came to make sure you took your pills. Did you?"

"Yes mom..." I rolled my eyes. "I'm not skipping them anymore."

"Good," he said. "You know it scares us when you do that. You need to take care of yourself more."

"I know, I know," I said. "Thanks. I really appreciate you looking out for me."

"Well, you're my little sister," he said. "I love you."

"Don't go getting sappy on me!" I exclaimed with a laugh. "I love you, too, bro. Now get out of my room before I have a hissy fit!" He laughed and said goodnight. Then I turned off my lights and got ready to bust my ass for the rest of the week until Regionals came.