Glee: A Brand New Direction (first book of Glee series)

Chapter 43: Boy V Girl

"The girls didn't get enough stage time at Regionals," Kitty said. "Honestly, we're the money makers here. The judges like to see girls."

"I highly doubt it was that weird wink Quinn taught you that won us first place," Blaine fought back. This was the new battle. It wasn't one-on-one fighting anymore; now it was a battle of the sexes. And Finn wasn't around to referee anymore. Unfortunately, it was Puck and Santana who had come down to visit and take over while Mr. Schue handled some school business. And with "Boy V Girl" written on the whiteboard, they found an opportunity to let their past resurface.

"Girls have a raw sexuality that guys just don't have," Santana told Blaine.

"Please," Puck said with an eye roll. "I have more sexuality in one bicep than any of these girls have in their entire bodies. Collectively."

"You don't see anyone attending girl group concerts just for the music," Santana told him.

"Um, One Direction, hello?" Puck pointed out. And the fight continued. Unlike Finn, these two only added to the fire. They did not know how to mentor correctly.

"Check this out," Santana said. She took off her jacket and tossed it to the chairs. Conveniently, it landed on Cory, who was, of course, in awe. She snapped her fingers at the band and the song began to play. Us girls all looked at each other with recognition in our faces and smiled. Puck shook his head at Santana but he played along.

And just like that, Santana performed a very voluptuous version of "Don't Cha" by the Pussycat Dolls, with the girls doing her backup and Puck rapping the Busta Rhymes part. From tthe look on all the guys' faces, Santana was definitely the hottest thing they'd ever experienced. So they probably did wish they had girlfriends as hot as she.

"And that is how girls do it," said Santana with a simper look.

"If we'd switched roles," Puck began, "I'd be just as smoking, maybe more, and you'd look ridiculous. Face it, Lopez, guys are better performers than girls."

 "You wanna put money where your mouth is?" asked Kitty, standing from her chair.

"Look, blondie," Puck told her. "You and I may have had a brief thing earlier this year but that doesn't make it okay for you to think you can take me and my boys on."

"You may be confident in your ability to be sexy," Kitty told him. "But your boys lack sex appeal."

"Then how did we sell all those calendars last January?" asked Blaine. "We're basically the OneDirection of McKinley."

And the group bickering began.

***

In an effort to get us fueled for Nationals, Santana and Puck gave us a new task. We had to perform songs by Pussycat Dolls (for us girls) and OneDirection (for the guys). They said it was for glee club but we all pretty much knew it was for them.

"Can I talk to you?" asked Jake as I walked into the choir room the next day.

"About?" I asked, continuing to walk to one of the chairs.

I took a seat and he took the one next to me. "I think we should do a number together," he said. "We're great together and the only people here who can dance so--"

"I thought you said I was awful," I said.

"With a little bit of practice--" he started.

"I don't need to rehearse," I interrupted him, not feeling like myself. Where was all this confidence coming from?

"Prove it," he said. He stood up as Ryder and Marley walked in and went to stand in the center.

"Go ahead little bro," Puck told him.

"I'll be doing a Pussycat Dolls song," he said.

"Seriously?" Puck said, obviously not happy about this deviation from his expectations.

"Julie," Jake said. "You think you can keep up?"

I crossed my arms and rolled my eyes as everyone glared at me. He was going to make everyone dislike me just like when I first joined. Freaking fantastic.

"Wait a minute," he said when I didn't answer. The music started and I knew I had to. The other girls helped me out, at least.

Girls: Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh, ahh, ahh, ahh. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh. Ahh.

The girls continued in the background as Jake and I got started. But nobody was off dancing other than he.

Jake: Everybody listen all over the world. I got a story 'bout my favorite girl 
Guys: Wait a minute...

I didn't bother standing up. With my arms still crossed, I played along.

Julie: Oh, my baby's sexy for sure. I had to have him when he walked through the door.
Guys: Wait a minute...
Jake: She was 'bout to drive me insane. She come with drama while I'm giving her change.
Guys: Wait a minute...
Julie: I'm focused but I'm losing control

I decided that I may as well win this one for the girls so I stood up.

Julie: He only wants me for my body and soul
Guys: Wait a minute

Jake: Girl, why you do me like that? You take all my money can't even call a player back.

I continued to sing with him for the chorus, along with the girls. And when my verse came I decided to start showing Jake that I could be just as sexy, if not more, as he. He decided this meant we were dancing together.

Julie: Minding my business I was doing my dance.
Unique: Go girl
Julie: Got my attention so I gave him a chance.
Girls: Wait a minute

I pushed Jake away and he played along perfectly. It was actually kind of fun.

Julie: Did I mention he was buying a bar?
Tina: Yes you did
Julie: Gave him my number, he was trying so hard
Girls: Wait a minute

I continued to sing and dance and noticed that the others were getting into it, especially the girls who were sitll harmonizing in the background. It was coming out to be pretty nice. That is, until we got to the next part of the performance and Jake decided he would start his sex-grind type of dancing.

Julie: What is your problem daddy? Slow your roll. Who you think you jiving? You're disturbing my flow. Why you be bugging? Like I'm some kind of hoe. Got no more questions now I want you to go. So break, break.

The girls were definitely having fun, except for Marley, who turned just in time to see Jake.

Jake: Hey let me talk to you for a minute. Shut up... shut up. I love the way you strut, girl, you already know. But I'm feeling like you don't want me. You're just after my dough.
Julie: Baby please, I'm fine, I'm not one of these hoes. Chasing dreams and diamond rings so don't call me no more.

I pushed him away once again, joining Kitty and Santana for sexy dancing in the middle as we girls harmonized together. Then we went back to the chorus and soon the song was over. Jake actually seemed relaxed and, well, happy when the song ended. He smiled and hugged me, so I hugged back. Excited that it seemed like some of the tension was gone. But while Jake and I were reviving our friendship through the power of dance, the other tensions were growing, and growing rapidly.