Time After Time

Opening Eyes

Mitch had awoken at around four in the morning and decided to get some food - just a small snack - when he noticed that Scott's door was slightly ajar. He grabbed a few small items from various cupboards and ate them, trying not to think about how much weight he would probably gain. Despite his negative thoughts, he was genuinely grateful that he no longer felt quite so lightheaded. He had caught sight of the empty bottle of wine that was set on the counter, and felt immediately uncomfortable. Glancing over at his friend’s room, he washed his small meal down with a mug of coffee. Mitch had found himself drawn to Scott's room like a magnet. Missing his friend and unable to see how visiting Scott when he was asleep could break any of his strict rules, he gently nudged the blonde's bedroom door open further, and peered inside. Scott was asleep, curled up in his blankets, which brought a small smile to Mitch's lips. Light poured in from beyond the door, illuminating the taller man's attractive features.

As the brunette tiptoed closer to his best friend, he noticed the tear stain on Scott's face. The countertenor bit his lower lip as he felt his eyes well up. He was hurting Scott. He was really hurting Scott. Mitch sighed and went to sit at the foot of the bed when he noticed the open book. Mitch, filled with curiosity, read through the page. He felt both uncomfortable and flattered – Scott really did care about him. The shorter man fiddled with the flimsy paper, noticing the way the page had been distorted by what Mitch could only presume where Scott’s tears. Feeling guilty, Mitch picked up the pen, and wrote the only thing he could think of – an apology. He’d left soon after, and had crept back into his own room, where he quickly found sleep, without finding tears.

When he next opened his eyes, at around midday, the realization of what he’d done hit him like a ton of bricks. Instantly confused, the countertenor sat up and let out a long string of expletives. Why the fuck had done that? How was writing in Scott’s diary a good idea? There was no way he was meant to see what the blonde had scrawled, so Scott would surely be annoyed. Mitch rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed. He was such an idiot. He was a stupid fucking idiot with no common sense that always behaved irresponsibly and could never deal with even the smallest amount of temptation. Exhaling deeply, he climbed out of his bed and hunted around his room for some fresh clothes. He needed to get out of the apartment for a bit – he couldn't deal with being near Scott, not after the dumb stunt he’d pulled. Pairing a plaid shirt with some dark jeans, he pulled on his creepers and reached for a beanie. Semi-presentable will do, right? he thought as he grabbed his keys, his wallet and his phone and left. As soon as he had sat in his car, it dawned on him that he had no idea where he was planning on heading to. Suddenly, Mitch was terrified – he was alone and vulnerable. What if someone hurt him? What if he ran into one of his (many) exes? What if, what if, what if. The questions filled up his brain and that grey cloud quickly returned. Close to tears, Mitch picked up his phone and called Kirstie, who answered almost instantly.

“Hey,”

“Hey. How’re you doing? Any better?”

“I don’t know. I think I did something stupid last night, and now I can’t be near Scott. I was going to go out somewhere, but... I-I don’t know where to go,” Mitch broke down again. He was so sick of crying, but nothing made him feel happy. Nothing but-

“Where are you?”

“In my car; I haven’t left yet,”

“Stay there. I’ll pick you up in ten, okay?” Kirstie said before hanging up, not giving the countertenor a chance to respond. Mitch rested his head on the car’s wheel and cried quietly. He was such a mess. The time passed without Mitch realizing, as he was snatched from his viscous thoughts by a knock on his car’s window. Kirstie stood there, looking incredibly concerned. The short man opened his car’s door and stepped out as his friend pulled him in for a hug.

“It’s going to be okay, Mitch,”

“I read his diary,”

“I know, Mitch, I know,” she whispered. The brunette man pulled away, horror etched over his face. “Scott called me this morning, honey. He’s just as confused as you, okay?” she continued, her voice still hushed. Mitch only nodded, wiping away the few tears that still remained.

“I’m scared to talk to him, Kirst... but I’m pushing him away and I can’t lose him,” Mitch murmured, feeling fresh tears burn in his eyes once again. He let out a sob and Kirstie wrapped her arms around him again, speaking softly to her friend in an attempt to soothe him. This diary could be a good thing, she thought, but I have to make both of them see that too.