Her Savior (completed)

Chapter 4 (TRIGGER WARNING)

The blinding sun beamed in from the window that was fully open.
I opened my eyes and blocked out the light with my hand.
I looked around the cold room, I was alone.
I glanced at the alarm clock beside me "4:23PM". Since it was Sunday, I didn't care how awfully late it was. It was peaceful, quiet, and calm--for once. I sat up and stretched; reaching up to the ceiling.

I heard distant talking, assuming it was my mother.

What ever happened to Robert? I didn't really stress about it as I normally would. I walked over to my record player and put in The Goo Goo Dolls. "Iris" began to play and I hummed along as I grabbed a notebook and some #2 pencils. Drawing was always a passion of mine. So was writing, I loved just spilling all of my emotions onto a piece of paper, maybe it was how I coped with life. I walked over to the end of my bed and sat on the floor. The sketchbook sat in my lap and I grabbed a sharpened pencil. Not knowing what to draw, I doodled random things; song lyrics, little hearts. I heard a light knock on the door, "Yes?"

"Can I come in?" It was my mom. "You can talk to me out there." I insisted.
"My date went missing last night. No one knows where he is, just wondering if you saw him." I could tell by her voice that she was concerned. I hesitated, "All I heard was the front door shut after you fell asleep". She sighed "Okay, thanks". I felt horrible for lying to her but that asshole deserved it--so did she for bringing him back. I picked my sketch pad back up and turned to a page of a poem I began a few months ago

"And you were just like the moon,

so lonely, so full of imperfections,

but just like the moon,

you shined in times of darkness-"

After few moments, I remembered something. Where's Tate? I stood up and began to pace the room. "Tate, I'm really sorry for being such a bitch. I forgive you, it isn't your fault" I whispered, I couldn't feel his presence there, not like other times, goddammit, do I have to accept this? Is he really-

"Please. I need you. I'm sorry."

I waited a few moments in silence. I sat back down onto the soft carpet rug and leaned back onto my bed. With anticipation, I sat there and began to contemplate. I had to start my new school tomorrow, I never fit in--anywhere. My mom says it's the best school in the town, to me, it means more people, smart people. I got up from my comfort and walked out of my bedroom and into my bathroom across the hall. I looked over at the white weight scale that sat on the other side of the room, glaring at it in frustration "You just did this Friday Cassy, it's the same". I let the curiosity overcome me and I found myself  stepping onto it, "153 lbs" I stared at the numbers for a few seconds in shock. It has to be broken, I can't possibly weigh that much. Tears began to build up in my eyes. I felt nauseous. "No, no, no."
I leisurely paced as tears started to pour out, I put my sleeve up to my chapped lips and fell to the floor. I was miserable, this happened every week; sometimes I weighed incredibly more or unbelievably less. I was slowly suffering. It was the stress of knowing the day was coming, the day to weigh myself... and I was always something I didn't want to see.

"Cassadee."

My eyes shot up. Tate stood in front of me. I was terrified he would think negative of me, maybe he thought it was because of him I was doing this and it isn't. I was extremely happy to see him but disappointed he came at this moment--I didn't want him to see me like this. He suddenly threw himself down to the floor and pulled me into a tight embrace.

"Please don't do this to yourself." He sighed with pain in his eyes

"You're beautiful"

He pulled back and played with strands of my brown hair as we gazed into each other's eyes. He tucked a piece behind my ear and took away my pain as fast as my anger I had once felt for him.

At that moment, I had realized he was the only one keeping me alive anymore. He replaced the deep emotional pain I've had for weeks just disappeared for the first time in every second, of every day, of every month, for 17 years.

Tate held my hand as he walked with me to my bedroom and sat me down onto my bed. He positioned himself, lying down next to me as I sat upright. He reached up and pulled my hair around my neck onto my shoulder. "I wish I could make everything okay for you." He sighed. I turned around and laid beside him, "You have." I felt him wrap his arm around my waist and grab my hand to hold it; gently but firmly cupped in mine.

He sat up and crawled to sit criss-cross in front of me, positioning his feet to hug mine. "I want to be with you forever Cassy."

I closed my eyes. "When you said you needed me," Tate cooed, "Did you mean it?" I rolled over to face him "Of course Tate" He gently smiled and pecked my nose. I blushed as I smiled back and situated myself in his arms, my head on his chest. I laid there listening to his rhythmic pounding heart till I drifted off to sleep.