January 23, 2011

228 17 1

ni torpedobelly

ni torpedobelly

“Good morning.”

She smiled, “Good morning.”

“Eat your breakfast.” I placed the food on the table beside her. “You need to stay healthy.” I fixed her pillow so she’ll sit up straight and won’t have trouble eating. After that, I left her. And she didn’t say any word.

Dear Diary,

When I went to her room after the night of our little infinity, she forgot who I am. As if I expect her to remember me, but I really felt sad. I know, she has a disease and I don’t expect her to remember me all the time, but it’s really sad when she forgot every memory you made with her, all those efforts you made to make her happy.

One time, I imagined if I was part of her childhood memory. And every time she sees me, she’ll be happy because she remembers me, because she knows me. Though, sometimes, we tend to forget our childhood memories. Well, except if that memory is important.

Most of the time, importance and significance are our basis in remembering things. Sometimes, when we think that it’s a pretty much useless memory, we just dump them somewhere, not knowing that that memory could have thought us something important. However, we can’t keep every memory in our mind. That’s why we have to throw some away. But we have to be careful of what we throw away.

Maybe if Via knew me beforehand, I could have been caught in the same accident, too. Why? Because I won’t stay away from her side. I’ll be beside her all the time. And because of that accident, maybe the two of us could have Goldfish disease. Or worse, maybe it would cause our death.

Or maybe if I could travel back in time, I would save her from that accident. She won’t have Goldfish disease or whatever. Unfortunately, she might not meet me in the future or maybe she’ll meet some other guy as her lover. Maybe saving her could change our faith, but it would be fine since she’s saved.

However, we just can’t change things that have happened in the past. Because whatever we do, it would affect the others. Like a ripple. And it would be disaster if we do so.