Believer ~ SPN One-Shots

I Promise

"Are you really gonna ignore me just because I said I loved Baby more than you?"

Dean asked his boyfriend in the kitchen. Cas didn't say anything, instead continued to avoid eye contact with him and searched the fridge for his beer. It was hard for him to stay mad at Dean like this. He wanted desperately to talk to him, but he hurt too much to even open his mouth. He'd gotten into arguments with Dean before, but not one as tough as this.

Dean searched the angel's blue eyes with his green ones, trying to unscramble his thoughts like Cas could do with his. "Cas, please, talk to me." He said softly. Cas stood and closed the fridge door. For a moment, he let his eyes drift to Dean's, but quickly looked away. With that, he walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, turning on the tv at full volume.

Dean stood in the kitchen, hurt and confused. He knows I didn't mean what I said, right? He thought to himself. He glanced over to where Cas lounged on the couch. Should I wait to talk to him?

Cas didn't move when Dean walked in. He stayed perfectly still, training his eyes on the television screen, biting his lip nervously, trying not to start crying.

"Cas..." Dean started, but Cas stopped him, sighing deeply. "You don't need to apologize Dean, I've heard what you had to say to me." He paused and looked at Dean. "I know you're true feelings." He turned back to the tv, yet he didn't seem to be watching the program. He more or less seemed to be staring right through it.

Annoyed, Dean snatched the remote from the couch and put the tv on mute. Cas opened his mouth to object, but Dean's cold stare made him stay silent. "Listen Castiel," He said angrily. "I know I've made mistakes. I know I've insulted you, ignored you, and so much more. But it hurts me most that I've hurt you." Dean's voice broke at that instant, and he put his hand over his eyes to try to stop himself from crying.

"I'm not a good friend Cas." He said softer now. "I'm really not. In fact, I don't know how you even deal with me anymore. I'm rude. I'm a jerk. I'm disrespectful. And you know what? I hate myself. All of this pain on you comes from me, and I know it. All of this is my fault. But I want you to know that you mean so much more than anything I've ever had, including Baby. You're always there for me Cas, and I didn't have that. You make me feel like I'm someone important. You..." Dean's voice trailed off and Cas cocked his head to the side, curious. "You're the best friend I've ever wanted Cas." Dean said, looking at the angel staring at him with awe. "You're family. You're our brother. I can't lose you."

Cas didn't say anything. He stood up slowly from the couch and began walking towards Dean. Dean backed up against the wall. Great. He's gonna kill me.

Dean closed his eyes, waiting for the worst of it.

Instead, Cas softly pressed his lips against his own, wrapping his arms around his neck. Dean didn't have a choice but to kiss him back. He slowly laid his hands on his waist.

When they parted, Cas let his head rest against Dean's chest, standing there silently before speaking. "I love you Dean. You won't lose me because I'm not going anywhere. You're my best friend too." "I love you too Cas." Dean whispered, kissing his head. Cas looked up and smiled. He wiped one of Dean's tears that had escaped him with his fingers and sighed.

"You promise you won't leave?" Dean asked quietly. Cas pulled him back into him, hugging him tightly. "I promise."