03/07/17

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Dear Andrew,

We went to the hospital today. I woke up with bleeding and I got really scared. I thought we were going to lose our little baby like we lost Angel.

But it's okay, we still have our baby. However...you're gonna hate me for this- for this decision I'm gonna make.

They told us that there is a possibility I may have a cancerous tumour. You were silent the whole ride home. But when we came home, you told me that if the results come up positive in a few days, I should get the chemo.

But getting the chemo means that there is a high chance that the baby could die. I am telling you now, loud and clear, I am not harming our baby. If I die then so be it but I am going to make sure our baby makes it out into this world.

I'm not gonna do the treatment, Drew. I can't afford to lose our baby. After Angel, I promised myself that if we have another chance at being parents then I was going to do the right thing and do my best.

I hope you understand my decision. I'm doing this for our family, Drew.

I love you so much and I am so sorry I keep messing up,
Spencer xx

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