Friends with Benefits

Chapter Sixteen

Things I own: my sanity, not enough time to write and incredible friends and family!!

Things I don't: Twilight, Edward and Bella (Damn. It.)

Chapter Sixteen

EPOV

Bella completely jacked up my radio stations. She was smugly listening to her iPod as I tried to get some semblance of order in my car. Willie's Roadhouse? Kidz Bop Radio? Korea Today? Where in the hell did she find these stations?! Focus on driving to your parent's, Edward. You can fix your precious radio stations once you're there. Navigating the roads, I managed to get Bella and me to my parents' home in little under an hour. Listening to some electronic Korean music. I think.

Up until Alice went to college, we lived in Forks. It's where my mom, Esme, grew up. My father, Carlisle was the head of the hospital in Forks and he enjoyed it, but I could tell he yearned for more. When Alice said that she wanted to go to School of Art in the Art Institute of Chicago, Carlisle encouraged it. He also encouraged my mom to move to Chicago so she could be close to her baby girl. That summer, the house in Forks was sold and we moved into this massive home in Glenview. It was smaller than our house in Forks, but property values were a lot more in Chicago than in the middle-of-nowhere, Washington. I was so grateful that they moved because I hated Forks.

I hadn't been back to Forks since. Bella asked me to come a few times, for the sake of nostalgia, but I loved living in Chicago. So did my dad. He was the chief of surgery at Advocate Lutheran General in Park Ridge. My mom dabbled in home design and interior decorating. She had a small business, staging homes for local realtors to improve their sales.

Now, I was dreading this Thanksgiving. The main reason why was a blonde spitfire that my brother was dating. Emmett, who was older than me by a year, was dating this woman, Rosalie. They'd been together for over two years. I'm surprised they were together for that long. Secretly, I was praying that he'd dump her ass because Rosalie's mean. No. Lie. The woman finds fault in everything. In how Emmett dresses, in my choice in career, in Alice's hair style, in the fact that Bella was closer to my momthan Rosalie was...there was nothing that Rosalie liked. Secretly, I prayed that she had food poisoning and was unable tocome, but as I pulled up to my parent's home, I saw her bright red BMW.

The wicked witch of the Near North was here.

"Oh, goodie, Bitch Queen is here," Bella deadpanned. "Can I rip out her blonde hair?"

"I'll hold her down," I said dryly.

Bella cracked her knuckles, gearing up for three days of pure and utter hell. Gathering our bags, I used my key to let myself in. I could already hear the grating voice of Rosalie, bitching about something. "...with Emmett being sick, I won't be able to go to work. I have to have my own room, Esme," Rosalie whined.

"It's not like I planned on catching a cold, Rosie," Emmett said. "I'll sleep with a mask on."

"No. That won't do," Rosalie snapped. "I need my own space. On a bed."

"We don't have enough bedrooms," Esme said quietly, her voice showing strain.

"Can we just have Thanksgiving at our place?" Bella hissed. "I'll get us a turkey."

"Tempting, Bells," I said, leading us up the stairs. Rosalie was standing in my room, her arms crossed.Oh, no. The evil wench is not staying in my room. I'll have to scour the sheets of her bitchy genes.

"Oh, Edward! I'm so glad you're here," Esme crooned, pulling me into a tight hug. "Can you represent me if I'm tried for murdering Emmett's girlfriend?" she hissed in my ear.

"Conflict of interest, Ma," I snickered, kissing her cheek. "What's wrong?"

"I refuse to sleep with Emmett. He's sick and I've got an important meeting with investors on Friday that I can't miss," Rosesaid snottily. "I'm claiming this room."

"Rose, where will Edward sleep?" Esme asked.

"With his fuck buddy," Rose snapped, gesturing to Bella.

"Rosalie," I growled. "That's not nice."

"Please? It's not like it's obvious," she said, tossing her bag onto my bed.

"I can sleep with Alice," Bella said quietly. "Edward can take the guest room."

"Jasper's coming," Esme frowned.

"Yeah, ewww...not going there," Bella giggled.

"I can sleep with Emmett," I sighed, running my hand through my hair. "But, if you snot on me, I'm kicking you out onto the floor, bro."

Rosalie smiled triumphantly, pushing all of us out of my room. I walked to Emmett's bedroom, dropping my bags onto the floor. Emmett followed me, sneezing loudly all over my sweater. "What do you see in her, Em?"

"She gives good head," Emmett sniffled, wiping his nose on his sleeve.

"And that's the basis of a beautiful relationship," I deadpanned.

A/N: Rosalie is a piece of work. A spoiled brat, if you will. Pictures of Carlisle and Esme's home are on my tumblr and blog. I also have pictures of Emmett and Rosalie as well. Links for both of those are on my profile. You can also find them on my Facebook page: Tufano79's Twilight Fanfiction Appreciation. Leave me some!