Friends with Benefits

Chapter Seventy-Nine

Things I own: my sanity (though, that's debatable at times), not enough time to write and incredible friends and family!!

Things I don't: Twilight, Edward and Bella (Damn. It.)

Chapter Seventy-Nine

EPOV

I drank almost all of the Gatorade and somehow managed to sober up. I paced anxiously in the hotel suite, worried sick about her. Bella was gone for the rest of the afternoon and well into the evening. I couldn't follow her since she had the car. I wouldn't have even known where to look. I felt badly for what I said. I was a first-class douche. I deserved her walking out on me.

And then some...

Around nine, she came back and she looked miserable. Her beautiful face was red, tear-stained and swollen from crying. Her posture was just dejected. I felt like a total asshole. "Bella," I croaked, looking up at her. I didn't care that we had fought, I needed to make sure she was okay. I hugged her and she responded, melting against my chest. "I'm so sorry, Bells. I was an asshole, a total douche canoe."

"You were right, Edward," she murmured against my chest. "You asked excellent questions. You brought up valid points." She pulled back, looking at me. "We should talk. You've had your say and now I want to say mine." She took my hand, sitting down on the couch and encouraged me to do the same.

"Can I just apologize once more? I shouldn't have said those things..."

"Edward, even though you were lit, everything you said was true. I've always cared about you. You are an amazing man and you deserve an amazing woman. I haven't been fair to you. I'm sorry for hurting you, but I'm terrified."

"I don't want just anyone, Bells," I muttered. "I want you."

"And I want you," she admitted. "But, if anyone feels inadequate, it's me."

"What? Why?"

"Edward, you've seen what I've dated. They were only with me for one thing and that wasn't intellectual conversation," she deadpanned. She cupped her boobs and spread her legs slightly. I growled lowly, pissed off that she would think that. "And then, for as long as I could remember, I've had this thing for you. But you were unattainable in my eyes. You were too perfect. Too handsome. Too Edward. Plus, you always treated me like a little sister, until that night."

"The benefit," I whispered. "And I'm far from perfect, Bella. Really?"

She rolled her eyes, curling up on the couch. "Right. That night, I felt like I was a princess and you were the prince to whisk meaway from the crap that I called my life. And for that one night, you did. I loved every moment with you. There were moments that I believed I was dreaming, but it was real. And amazing. And...I was scared, though. I still am." She played with her hair, twisting it anxiously. "I'm scared that you're going to change and become one of those assholes. I'm scared that I'm going to ruin everything between us and your tirade proves that I did."

"Bella, I was drunk and pissed off at your reaction this morning to us sleeping together," I said, tugging at my hair. "Youroverreaction to us falling asleep while you were topless."

"My reaction was irrational. You have seen them. You've touched them. Hell! You've had your mouth on them..."

"Bella, you're driving me bonkers," I choked out, trying to not imagine my mouth wrapped around her nipple.

"Anyhow, what I'm trying to say is that I hate what's happened to us. I don't want to lose our friendship but I miss what we had this morning. I liked waking up with you, feeling your arms around me," She looked at me and she gave me a tiny smile. "I want to try, Edward. You and me. A relationship..."

"As in you'd be my girlfriend?" I asked, disbelief coloring my voice.

"Yeah, but I want to go slowly, Edward. Yes, we've seen each other naked and fucked each other six ways to Sunday. I don't want to make the same mistakes as we did earlier," she murmured. "I want to do this relationship thing right."

"No rules?" I asked.

"No rules," she verified. "Everything that I mentioned after the benefit is now moot. Well, except for telling people. I want to hold off telling everyone until we can get through this rough patch. I don't want tell Alice that we're a thing and then somethingimplodes, you know?"

"That works for me," I said. "But, I want clarification. I can kiss you?"

She blushed, looking up at me through her lashes. "Yeah," she admitted nervously.

"I can kiss you, my girlfriend," I murmured, looking at her. She bit her lip and nodded slowly. I moved closer to her, cupping her cheek. "No changing your mind."

"No. I want this, Edward," she whispered. "I'm sorry for hurting you and..." She never finished. I crashed my mouth against hers and sighed at the perfection of her lips moving with me. Bella let out a small whimper as she moved to straddle my waist, tangling her fingers into my hair. My hands were cupping her heart-shaped face, caressing her smooth skin. Tracing my tongue along her lips, she opened her mouth and allowed me entry. I tasted her sweet mouth, groaning in pleasure. As I moved my thumb along her cheek bone, I felt dampness. Pressing a chaste kiss to her lips, I pulled away. She was crying.

"Bells, don't cry," I said. "Please don't cry. I'm sorry for being so awful today."

"I'm crying because I'm happy," she said, throwing her arms around me. "I always thought that I wasn't good enough for you."

"Bells, you're everything I've ever wanted and more," I whispered in her hair, truly meaning it.

A/N: So, Bella got her head out of her ass. And Edward was an ass, but she still wants him. He still wants her, too. Now, I know I promised lemons...they will be building intimacy. The lemons will be building as we progress and I'm warning you, the 'drama' isn't over yet. You'll see...Leave me some!