waterparks imagines / preferences

alone ; awsten » tw

TRIGGER WARNING!!!!!
this chapter may involve mention of self harm and/or suicidal thoughts and so on.
please read with caution. 💕

i feel like i'm out of my mind.
i'm always alone.
and sometimes dark thoughts take over.
usually i can handle it.
but not tonight.

i keep staring at my reflection.
disgusting.
worthless.

the longer i stare at myself, the more i hate what i see.

"what did i do.", i quietly say.
tears running down my cheeks.

it feels like time slowed down as i slid down the wall, facing the oak cabinet under the sink.
i could have sworn it was staring back at me.
trying to take apart my soul.
i could almost hear it say the words i dreaded the most.

" do it "

tears fall faster as i consider my options.
should i?
would it even matter?

i pull myself closer to cabinet, take a deep breath, and open it.

i stare at all of the chemicals.
the bleach whispers my name.
i pick up the bottle, running my fingers over the slightly cracked label.

"y/n, we're home!", i hear my mom yell from downstairs.

i sigh and put the chemical back.

i go to my room and fall asleep quickly, listening to my favorite band, Waterparks.

- the next day -

i wake up to my mom staring at me.

"good morning?", i say, it coming out more as a question.

"i have an early birthday present for you.", she smiles.

i die a little more inside when she says that.
i always told myself that i would never make it past 17.

"open it.", she pushes a package towards me.

once the unnecessary tape is off, i rip the box open.

it's two pieces of paper on top of a hoodie.

' Admission 1
Waterparks
art of literature house , (hometown) , (state)
Doors open @ 6:00 pm '

"thank you so much.", i say tearing up and hugging her.

"it's tonight, so please get ready soon.", she smiles and leaves my room.

i'm really about to see waterparks.

i throw on my new waterparks hoodie and some skinny jeans, along with a pair of vans.

i walk downstairs and my mom says, "we're going to get food before, so we're gonna leave in 5."

for the 5 minutes, which felt like 5 years, i sat on my phone.

we ate at a small cafe that's down the street from the venue.

"no , if you don't want to go into the pit you don't have to.", I explain to my mom.
she just stares behind me.

"hello?", I ask snapping my fingers.

i turn around to see a blue haired boy.

"I like your hoodie.", he smiles.

"thanks! i like your music.", i blush.

"thank you.", he smiles, "are you coming to the concert tonight?"

"yeah, im so excited."

"me too. do you mind if i sit with y'all?", he asks.

"no, go ahead.", my mom says.

"what's your name?", he asks.

"Y/N"

"pleasure to meet you."

"you too."
he smiles and pulls up a chair.
"so what got you into our music?"

"i am a hardcore mcr stan, and i heard mikey was playing with you guys. i checked out your music and instantly fell in love with it. you guys saved me.", i explain.

"so is otto! that's really cute. im glad that we that we can help. do you have a twitter? i would love to stay in touch.", he says.

"yeah, that would be great.", i smile.

i expected him to ask me for my twitter, but he handed me his phone.

he opened the twitter app and asked me to type it in.

after i did, he clicked follow and my phone instantly went off.

he quickly took a picture of us and posted it with the caption, 'met the coolest person today :)'

my phone went off again, telling me that he posted something.

"You have my notifications on?", he asks excitedly.

I nod and he hugs me.

"I have to go, but you guys should come to our bus after the show. just tell the guard your name and he'll let you in. it was great to meet y'all.", he says.

"okay we will, it was great to meet you too.", I smile.

he kisses my forehead and walks out.

i put my head down.

"did that just happen.", i say.

"it did.", my mom says smiling at me.

tears begin forming in my eyes.

for the first time in what feels like forever, i was crying because I'm happy.

I tried to make this sad and happy sorry if it didn't rlly work.

It was supposed to show how your life can fall apart one day and the next your favorite band or someone you look up to can change all of that.
Thank you guys for reading :) -R