A Thin Line Between Love & Hate (Love Conquers All series) ORIGINAL VERSION

Chapter 61: "Brother. Friend. Ally."

"Let down your guard

And show me your colors

Don't fight it anymore

Show me you're with me

Open your arms

I'm not like the others

So, don't fight it anymore no

What will it take for me to make you see

I'm not your enemy."

- Not Your Enemy, Jesse McCartney

Josh sat tensely in the passenger seat, uncertain where Uriah was taking him and afraid to ask. When they'd left the driveway, rather than heading back toward town, Uriah had turned down the other direction. Josh didn't know what was down this way, or where the road led to. His brother remained silent, eyes straight ahead, his expression neutral. Josh had always been able to tell if Uriah was angry; he never tried to hide it. If he was angry now, it wasn't showing in the usual way. Still, Josh couldn't relax.

The further they drove, the tighter Josh's stomach knotted up. The anxiety was starting to make him car sick. Just when he was sure he might puke, the car slowed and turned off the main rural road onto a dirt road. Dust plumed up around the Mustang as Uriah guided the car into the woods. Once out of sight of the two-lane road, he parked and killed the engine.

Josh didn't say anything as Uriah just stared out the windshield a moment. He finally cleared his throat and popped open his door. "Get out."

Every nerve in his body on edge, Josh climbed out of the car and hesitantly followed Uriah to the front.

His brother took a seat on the hood, heels hooked on the bumper. He nodded at Josh to sit down and Josh scooted up on the hood, a couple feet of space separating them. Uriah leaned on his knees and stared off into the trees, a pinch in his brow. "I'm going to ask you something," he said without looking at Josh. "And you're going to tell me the truth. Do you understand?"

Josh's nausea flared up again. He swallowed hard. "Yes."

Silence settled between them as Uriah seemed to fade into some private thought. "Last night." He spoke abruptly, startling Josh. "What happened? What did father do to you?" Uriah turned his head, stern eyes boring into Josh. "Where did he take you?"

An involuntary tremor swept through Josh. "He...he locked me in the root cellar out back."

Uriah frowned. "Why? Because you were rude to Grace at school?" Doubt tainted his voice.

Josh stared at him, fear coursing through him.

"Tell me," Uriah insisted. "The truth."

Too scared to expose himself, Josh went for "most of" the truth and hoped Uriah wouldn't realize he was holding something back. "He asked me about the thing with Grace, why I'd yelled at her. When I told him she wanted us to have sex and I didn't want to, he asked me what teenage boy wouldn't want to...to fuck a pretty girl. Then he said..." Josh hugged his gut. "...except for a faggot. H-He asked me if I was one and I told him no. I said I just wasn't ready to have sex yet."

"And then what did he do?"

"He asked me if I knew the expression 'where there's smoke, there's fire' then said that Patty was blowing a lot of smoke my way, and asked if he looked close enough...would he find fire." Josh blinked, his eyes stinging at the frightening memory. "He...he kept pushing it, saying he wanted to believe me but that there had always been something off about me, saying I was weak and...and infected...and that I wasn't going to make it to heaven." His throat worked as tears burned. "He accused me of making friends with the...faggot...and that he'd poisoned my soul." Josh shuddered at the recollection of his father's fury. "He started accusing me of...of doing things with Brandon. I tried to tell him I hadn't but he just got angrier and angrier, telling me I was lying. Then he asked me if I wanted to go to hell, that if I did then he would show me what hell was like." Josh ducked his head and squeezed his eyes shut, the horror coming back on him.