i still want you

Depression

I texted Casey, my old friend. Old, in the meaning of a long time ago we were like besties, but he moved, And I got why.

I'm starting my day with an interview,it's ellen degeneres show. I got ready and I left. I got to he studio and saw the questions she was oing to ask me.

After a lil of questioning myself about these, I went on stage and it went like this:

E- So, today we have the honor to receive, the one and only Mackenzie Ziegler!

M- Hey.

E- Nice to meet you, Mackenzie.

M- You can just call me Kenzie.

E- Okay, so, we already had your sister, Maddie, over here.

M- Yes, I know.

E- Let's start with this one: Is Jenzie real?

M- He broke my heart, just in the moment when I nedded him the most.

E- Are you okay? Do you have anything to say to your fans?

M- Girls, don't cry over guys, they'll bring another one in your own funeral.

E- Wow,  Now, what is the bravest thing you have ever done?

M- The bravest thing I've ever did was, continuing my life, while I wanted to die.

E- Oh, really?

M- Yeah, you know,sometimes, fake a smile is better to tell your real feelings.

E- Oh, so your often fake smiling?

M- Always.

E- I'm kind of worried

M- People nice are worried, but I've always been afraid of loosing someone, but, what if nobody's afraid of lossing me?

E- Don't say that that!

M- They all say "destroy what destroys you" so, I did, I destroyed myself.

E- Don't, we all know that this thing isn't real.

M- Buty, everyone is seeing the beatifull smile and the laugh, but they never noticed, the real feeling.*

E- What feeling?

M- You know, people don't see what hurts you, until it kills you and you die. Hearing something that kills you inside, but you have to act like you don't care.

E- I can see, that you're really hurt by Johnny.

M- Her broke my heart... but I still love him with all the pieces.

E- So, you still love hiom?

M- Yeah, but the hardest part isn't to  forget, but to watch the one you love, loving someone else.

E- Thanks for coming, thiose were really big words and I apreciate.

M- Thanks for having me here.

I feel it:

J- I heard Ellen, last night.

M- Forget me, I'm just, not worth it.

Heyy, I'm back with an other update. Sorry, I had a really important audition for a TV show, so, I hadn't enought time to update.

-LinaXOXO