i still want you

Cheated

Johnny's POV

I know, I know, I've been an asshole with her, I know how she feels, I feel the same, But, Its Lauren, she forced me to do that, and I know, once again, that, If I really loved her, I would have reffused, but, I didn't, that's why I feel guilty, this girl was my jackpot, and I broke her heart 4 times:

-one before to even know her, 

-Second, in the Hospital.

Third, cheating on her with Nadia.

and finally

Fourth, now, while I chose my sister, before even thinking about her.

The problem is that I still care, about her love, her feelings, her heart, her look, her smile. 

I just, still care about her.

Before all this, she told me she was going on ellen, which is cool, I opened the TV and watched the whole episode.

A few moments later:

My heart is stabed, I hurt her so much, I feel as guilty as Lauren felt when she tried to kill her.

I don't know many things, I don't know what to say.

I just grabbed my phone and sent the folowing message:

J- I heard Ellen, last night.

M- Forget me, I'm just, not worth it.

J- What do you mean "not worth it"? You're always worth it, and you're always going to be, its my mistake, I know what I did was wrong, but, I don't know, Lauren's my sister.

M- Yeah, yeah, and You were my Boyfriend.

J- You were so stupid to love me.

M-You were all I wanted.

J- But you deserved better

M- You were everything I wanted.

J-It couldn't be.

M- yes, it can, beacause, I still love you, but this is our love story, now, its all broken and ripped out.

J- Its not what you think.

M- I love you, we were unforgettable.

J- Yeah, but I hurt you, and I don't want to be forgived, I want to be forgotten, by  you.

M-But, you can't really come up and say: Forget me.

J- I know you're hurt, but as I said forget me. I loved you, and I do lstill love you, because, I'm not the one who needs to forgive, I'm the one who needs to be forgiven.

M- Yeah, and I forgive you.

J- No, you're not you hate me. I know you do, you only say that because you want the happiness, but, I can tell you won't be happy, you'll only be dissapointed, about me an about you. You'll feel sad everyday, and at the end, you'll breakup, because, I hate to see you hurt, and I can see it when you are, so please, please do me a fovor, think, before to act.

-LinaXOXO