ZANVIS
FLOWER SHOP AU
Zane: *slams $20 on the counter* HOW DO I PASSIVELY AGGRESSIVELY SAY 'FUCK YOU' IN FLOWER
Travis: alright, geraniums for stupidity, foxglove for insecurity, meadowsweet for uselessness, yellow carnations for you have disappointed me, and orange lilies for hatred
SUPERHERO/VILLAIN AU
Travis: Sorry sweetheart! Normally any day I'd do handcuffs, but tonight just won't work out for me
Zane: the suspect is escaping out the window! Someone shoot him so he stops talking!
PHOTOGRAPHY AU
Travis: C'mon! Strike a pose! Show off those curves!
Zane: the only curve you'll be seeing is the curve of your broken nose
GARRENCE
THEATRE AU
Garroth: so am I supposed to say this line with determination or hopelessness
Laurence: I don't care I'm supposed to be dead at this point
SCIENCE LAB AU
Garroth: cesium and water in a glass bottle should be interesting
Laurence: garrOTH NO
LIBRARIAN AU
Laurence: a kid just asked me where to find the porn books and I sent them to the religion section
Garroth: this is why teens hate the library
KATEMAU
MALL COP AU
Aph: ma'am I'm going to have to ask you to leave the premises if you keep shouting "Gremlin" at the little kids
Katelyn: *pointing at aph* GREMLIN
PET SHOP AU
Katelyn: Aph please that parrot belongs in its cage not your pocket
Aph: *with a suspiciously moving bulge in her pocket* I have no idea what you're talking about
MUSIC STORE AU
Katelyn: can you play fall out boy in here
Aph: this is a classic music store but sure why not
KIMCINDA
COLLEGE AU
Lucinda: man I wonder who this goody-two shoes 'Kim' everyone talks about is like
Kim: *running up to Lucinda* look I don't know you and you don't know me but I just exploded a washing machine and I need your help
ULTA AU
Lucinda: what would look better? Rosebud or carnation? It's for Halloween...
Kim: depends on if you wanna kiss anyone... like me
NASA AU
Lucinda: are you wearing spacepants? Cause your butt is out of this world!
Kim: Lucinda please the rover
HAHAHAHA FOUR HUNDRED WORDS BE IMPRESSED PEASANTS WOO
YOU ARE READING
~MCD SHITPOSTS~
Hayran KurguI mean, I was going to call it headcanons 2, but let's be honest here
