Forgotten (HS)

14

I was awake but my body was still slumped on top of Harry's. I could smell the faint scent of alcohol in the car and it only made me realize I couldn't come home to my parents smelling like this and wearing the same clothes I had been yesterday. Last night was a blurry mess from what I remember. But I do remember one thing and that was when Harry told me he loved me.

He was probably still drunk so maybe he didn't mean it? I don't know. I haven't even thought about Harry like that. I mean I have fantasized about a relationship with him but I haven't thought about it seriously.

I feel bad for saying that I don't completely trust him but I know like nothing about him or his past. I'm curious as to what type of person he is. Or was. He seems like an angel when he's with me. I've never experienced any sort of player vibe from him.

What if he was one of those guys? What if at his old school he did in fact sleep around? I wouldn't necessarily judge him on his past but I want to know if that's still how he is now. He could very well just be playing with my emotions. It's happened before. Harry is just different though.

If he was playing my emotions why would he trust me enough to call me at two in the morning crying? Harry Styles crying. That tattooed guy that smokes on people's lockers. I didn't know what to think. The only thing I knew was that I was falling for him. Hard.

But would he be there to catch me? That's why I need to know more about his other highschool years. I don't want to blindly get involved only to end up heartbroken. And to be heartbroken was one of the things I was most terrified of.

If Harry and I were to be just friends I'd probably explode because that wouldn't be enough. If Harry and I dated and it was all just a game then I'd be crushed. I probably would just drop out of school at that moment and move to America.

But if Harry and I were to seriously date maybe we could have a future together? Okay now I'm just talking crazy. I've only known him for like two weeks and I'm already wondering if we're going to have a future.

HARRY'S POV

I heard Anna's steady breathing but I couldn't tell if she was awake or not. If she was asleep I didn't want to wake her up so I'd just stay still even though the backseat of this car was uncomfortable. I'd rather sleep on the concrete.

Last night was probably one of the best nights of my life. Yes I've gotten drunk before and slept with probably numerous girls but this was better. I wasn't under the pressure of my physco friends. It was just Anna and I.

When we were about to fall asleep I told her I loved her. And it was true. I really think I did love her but I know she wouldn't love me back. She's too good for me and once she finds out about my awful past she'll leave and never look back.

That's what I'm afraid of. Of her not wanting anything to do with me because I'm such a screwed up mess. After my father just left I couldn't take it. I found that bad group of friends your parents would warn you about and got too involved.

The longer I stayed the harder it was to leave. I was practically forced into every thievery act and scandal they did. I didn't know how to get out of it though. So I sat there wasting my life away with cocaine and mirijanuna.

I don't even remember the last two years of my life because I was in such a dark place. Getting high every night. Screwing a different girl probably twice my age. But I didn't care about anyone but myself.

Finally my mum woke up and realized what a train wreck I was and shipped me off to rehab. It sounds like a bad thing but actually that's how I'm some what sane now.

I'll only get drunk every once and a while like I did with Anna and I'll only smoke once in a while when I'm stressed although the day Anna crushed my cigarette happened to be the last one of the pack so I haven't gotten a chance to buy some new ones.

I know how addicting those things can get so I try to stay away from them. I don't do drugs at all anymore which I think is an improvement in my destructive life.

The thing is is that I care about Anna. A lot. I haven't cared about anyone in a long time. I want to be there for her but I don't know if I can. I've never been in a relationship. Ever. So to be in one with Anna is going to take a lot of effort.

I don't want to hurt her and knowing me that's probably exactly what I'll end up doing. I can't stay away from her though because then she'll think I'm ignoring her. And I don't want that to happen. We're technically each other's real friend so for us to be apart is to have two extra lonely people in the world.

I don't know the first thing about relationships though. Was last night even a date? No I don't think getting super drunk is considered a date. Does Anna even want to be in a relationship with me?

This is why feelings suck because so many questions and worries come along with it.

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Hey so I know that was a short and probably boring chapter but I just thought it'd be good to get into both Harry and Anna's thoughts on relationships if that makes sense.

Keep reading commenting and voting!!

-katherine:)