*they spent the the next few hours playing around with the twins until their naptime came around, luckily for them, Bella and Mason had decided to make it easy for them and had fallen asleep within ten minutes of them beginning the process of putting them down for their nap, from there they took the baby monitor and curled up together on the bed, not even talking, just being there and being present with each other, using touch rather than speech to communicate, no one could possibly understand how they were feeling except each other and there was something about that which made them feel closer to each other than ever, but it wasn't too long before there was a knock at the door, signalling for them to head to the sitting room close by where Belle was waiting for them*
Ben: you alright for this?
Mal: yeah, are you?
Ben: I don't really know yet
Mal: whatever happens, we'll get through this
Ben: if she says anything, I'm not gonna stand for it, I promise
Mal: don't start anything with her over me, especially not now
Ben: okay, come on
*he led her through and they found Belle sat waiting for them, she was clearly surprised to see Mal was with him but quickly recovered herself and gave her a smile, Mal couldn't quite figure out if it was fake or not so she decided not to give it a second thought and hope for the best*
Ben: hey mom
Belle: Ben, how are you?
Ben: alright I guess, how are you?
Belle: still waiting for it to him me I guess, and Mal? How're you doing?
Mal: the same as you I guess, figuring it all out slowly
Belle: aren't we all
*Ben and Belle began discussions and Mal quickly zoned out, this time for different reasons though, she found herself lost in her own thoughts very quickly, she couldn't help seeing it, the look on her mother's face before she realised what was happening, the foul joy of it all, he pride on her face at what she'd done, the evil, plain and simple, hen seconds later there was a sword in her heart and the smile faded, the cackle stopped, it all stopped, her eyes went from icy cold to almost desperate, pained, shocked, then the light in them began to fade, Mal remembered every little detail, it had only been a few days, she knew it had, she knew that she would have to give it time, but something about the clarity of it all, the way she could remember every little detail, gave her the sickening feeling that she'd never be able to forget or even have the memory fade, she was suddenly pulled out of her thoughts when she heard her name and felt Ben squeeze her hand*
Ben: Mal?
Mal: hmm? Sorry, I must've zoned out
Ben: you okay?
Mal: yeah, I'm fine
Belle: we asked if you felt comfortable coming and sitting at the front of the cathedral or if you would prefer something else?
Mal: Ben? I already told you I'd go
Ben: yeah but if you're not okay with it then don't feel you have to, I'll cope
Mal: n...no, I'm fine, I promised you I'd go and I meant it
Ben: if you're not up to it, then you could just stay here with the twins?
Mal: I'm FINE Ben
Ben: alright, calm down
*she took a deep breath to stop herself yelling at him for that and just as much so as a warning to him that she was not impressed with his last statement, he quickly backtracked and apologised, having realised that was probably the wrong thing to say*
Ben: sorry, I just wanted to make sure
*looking at him, she felt guilty immediately for having snapped at him to begin with*
Mal: I know, sorry
Ben: what do we want to do about the twins?
Mal: when is it?
Ben: in about a week
Mal: she can't go, thats definite
Belle: is she okay?
*Mal turns to look at belle and Ben's eyes fall on her, unsure if she'll say it or not, and how she'd react but Mal just turned back to Ben and rested her head on his shoulder, he kissed her forehead gently and then met his mother's gaze with his own*
Ben: her powers are much stronger than it would be normal for a full Gary to be, she's only a quarter but like Mal's they're especially strong and she can't control them, it's dangerous for her, Mal's having to control them for her and it's draining Mal as well, honestly, she's just not well, she hasn't been right since she was born, I mean she must be getting better because they don't need her under constant supervision of the doctors now but she's not right
Mal: I couldn't do the one thing I was supposed to do while I still had her in me, I couldn't protect her from something so stupid as being ill
Ben: Mal, we've talked about this, you're not guilty
Mal: I still feel it
Belle: Ben was ill, they'd been worried about him from the start, it wasn't the first time I'd been pregnant, I kept loosing them, I tried my best, did everything all of the doctors told me, but I just didn't seem to be compatible with being a mother and then we we finally got past the three month mark with Ben and it all seemed to be going okay until I was about three months away from being due and something happened, I never really got told what but I just know we ended up in the hospital and I don't know if I passed out or they put me to sleep or what but I just remember waking up and the look on your father's face Ben, I thought you were gone too, you were so tiny, you barely survived, they spent months doing this that and the other to help you, more than once you stopped breathing, you were in their care rather than ours for six months, it was touch and go until you were at least two years old, I blamed myself for a long time after every miscarriage and every single thing that happened to you, every time you were back in the hospital again , but you can't stop it, you'll want to, I know you will, but you can't keep them safe from every single little thing, you've just gotta be with them when it all stops and then make the most of every moment when it's going again
Ben: I never knew any of that
Belle: we didn't want you to know, I thought about telling you when you told us you two were expecting and explained it all but I just couldn't
Ben: I'm glad you have now
Belle: you were a miracle, you've always been my little baby boy, and now you've got your own little baby boy, and a beautiful little girl too, it won't always go right, but it not your faults, you can't blame yourself Mal, it'll end up consuming you if you do
Mal: it's hard to stop it
Belle: I know, but you've gotta fight it, the guilt shouldn't win, ever, because you didn't do anything wrong, life just isn't fair
Mal: you don't have to tell me that twice
Ben: you've done so well baby, you got this far
Mal: I want to see if she can go, I mean if she's wrapped up nice and warmly and we're careful, but then I don't want them to start crying or something and cause a problem
Ben: yeah, we know what she's like, everyone will be really sad
Mal: it's not everyone who affects her I don't think, it's you, me and her brother
Belle: you don't want to leave then do you?
Mal: I can't stand it, I hate leaving them
Belle: I understand, I didn't like leaving Ben either
Ben: Mal I didn't realise it bothered you that much
Mal: of course it does, doesn't it bother you?
Ben: well yeah but I haven't really had much choice so far
Mal: well now we do
Ben: okay, we'll talk to the doctors then, if you don't mind that mom?
Belle: of course I don't mind, I love seeing them
Mal: you're always welcome to come see them
Belle: I mustn't intrude, you need your time as a family
*just then, crying starts coming from the baby monitor that Ben had put on the coffee table and both parents sighed as they heard that their twins were awake*
Ben: alright, mom, can you give us a minute?
Belle: of course
Mal: no, Ben it's fine, I'll go
Ben: on your own?
Mal: it's fine, you guys have to sort things out, I'll be back once I'm done
Ben: alright, give me a shout if you need me
Mal: you mean like THISSS
Ben: YES THAT SHOULD JUST ABOUT COVER IT
*they both chuckle, she gets up, bends down to give him a kiss and then leaves the mother and son to discuss arrangements*---------------------------------------------
I can never decide if I want you guys to love or hate belle so yanno let's play around with her character a little, what do you think of her now you've heard that? Change anything for you at all or no? Do you love or hate her, taking everything she's done into account, I'm hoping to update asap so yeah here ya go Xoxo
YOU ARE READING
Bal: it starts with me & you
FanfictionStarting immediately after the previous book, Mal has just seen the man she loves die at the hand of her mother But of course that wasn't the end of the story, with so many twists and turns just in the first few chapters what do you really know? The...