Therapy

-Chapter Nine-

No dedication lol no one likes me 🙄😊
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"I'll be in the car." Mikey says. I nod.
"Thanks Mikey. You're the best." I say. He kisses my cheek and walks off. I message Axel.
'Hey Axel. I'm so sorry about earlier. Come to the park and I'll explain?'
I sit on a bench, chewing my lip anxiously.
'Don't worry about it. I'll be there in 5.' I shut my eyes and lean back against the bench. What am I going to tell him?

•••••••••••
I see Axels car pull up and he walks over to me. I stand up as he gets to me and he pulls me into his arms. They're warm and comforting. He cares so much. A tear rolls down my cheek. I pull away and look at him. Concern crosses his face.
"Aspen? Why are you crying? Did something else happen?" I shake my head, more tears streaming down my face.
"Axel. Please know that I love you so so much. I appreciate everything you are so much. I'm so sorry, Axel." I say, my face heating up.
"W-what are you talking about?" Axel steps closer to me. I step backwards, earning a look of confusion.
"I've been lying to you..." I look away, dreading the look on his face.
"You.... what?" Axel asks, his voice shaky.
"This girl who you love? It isn't me. The glamour and confidence, all the friends, it's not me. You know who my father is... his reputation. It falls on me. I need to keep his reputation shiny. My life is hell, Axel. Mikey is the only one who knows that. You and Sage, Alice, you don't know me. I've been pretending. And I love you so much, Axel. It kills me to be saying this but it's true. I'm so sorry." By now I'm sobbing and the tears are rushing down my face. I dare my self to look up at Axel. There are so many emotions on his face right now; anger, confusion, shock, heartbreak, and the one that stands out the most, hurt.

It's always pained me to see Axel hurt or upset. But this time, knowing I've caused it, is like murder.
"You.. lied? All of it? Your love for me? It was all pretend?" Tears roll down his cheeks. I shake my head.
"No. I love you so, so much, Axel. But the girl you love is not me." I reach out to grab his hand, but he steps away. I feel a stab in my heart. "Axel, please." I whisper. He shakes his head.
"No. You lied. I've been nothing but honest to you, and you've been lying about everything. I- I can't do this." He steps backwards again.
"No. Axel. Don't do this. Please don't do this!" I yell, the tears getting heavier. He drops his head, giving a small shake. He turns and walks back to his car.

I fall to my knees. The ugliest sobs are escaping my lips and my breathing is all other the place. The feeling I have right now is awful. Like I'm being stabbed over and over again with a blunt knife. Or a rope is being tugged tighter and tighter around my neck. This feeling I have? Guilt, regret, pain, anger... and heartbreak.

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A/N
Omgg!!!!
This was so hard to write! Ahhhhh!!!!