everything, everthing

farkle

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my favorite room in the whole house is my music room. it has a white brick wall with a light wooden floor. it used to be an extra bedroom but we never needed it so we changed it. the walls have industrial pipes going through them, painted white to match the rest and the whole wall looks weathered. shawn helped build this room for me after he got married to mom. i guess he wanted to give a im-a-nice-person present.

the room's decor is something that you would see right out of tumblr or pinterest. a huge rug covers the most of the room and a wooden piano and record table that my yellow suitcase like record player lays on  sit on opposite sides of the room. little industrial lights hang down to provide light, they never bothered me since i'm so short. there's also a desk near the piano that has my microphone and a couple of notebooks and pens.

fake plants and small succulents line the room as they bring the only brightness i'll ever have. the walls are covered in polaroids and photographs of nature along with stickers of bands and artists i love.

most days i love this room. it makes me feel safe and happy. other days it makes me feel. . , well trapped.

by the time i get down the room, farkle's looking through my collection of vinyls. a couple are still in my room from the previous night with riley and lucas though. farkle examines the beatles albums i have when i walk in.

"why the beatles?" he asks.

"why not,"

he lets go of the records and walks towards me. he leans against the wall opposite of me and copies my pose.

"are you going to stay there the whole time?" i ask.

"i'm thinking about it. shawn said to stay the furthest away from you as possible and shawn doesn't seem like a man i want to piss off."

i laugh. "shawn's not scary i promise. and if he is than i'll make you a bundt that's actually edible."

"deal, but are you going to stay there?" farkle raises an eyebrow as he looks over at me. i'm still in the doorway and i haven't even stepped foot in the room. i close the door not taking my eyes off of him and he tracks my movements.

after all the messages it seems surreal and that i knew him, but right now it doesn't. he's taller and leaner than i thought and some of his biceps show through is black t-shirt. his honey tan skin seems warm to touch.

"you're different than i thought," i blurt out.

he smirks. "sexier right? it's okay to say it."

i chuckle. "how have you been able to carry around an ego that size and weight."

"it's in the muscles." he flexes his arm and his biceps rise up. i start laughing and laughing, starting to feel more comfortable with this. i notice that he's just staring at me while i laugh.

"you have really long hair and freckles." he states.

"what's wrong with freckles,"

"might be a deal breaker," he tilts his head and smiles. a dimple. cute.

we laugh together and when the laughter subsides, i realize how different this would be on messages. there wouldn't be an awkward silences, we would just mask it up with an conversation we could think of. it seems like our minds or blank without thought but mine is far from that. his eyes were really atlantic ocean eyes. ocean eyes that seeing in person was much different than dreaming of flying and in flight.

"some room you got here," he says as his ocean eyes wander around.

"yeah, shawn built it for me, i guess since i was always playing around with music and they got tired of hearing it," i giggle.

"so can you play all of those," he points to the ukulele, guitar, piano and drum set. i nod. he gets silent again as if he's thinking.

"you can ask me," i answer his unasked question.

he's wearing a thin black rubber band that he pulls a few times before continuing, "how long have you been sick?"

"my whole life," i answer. i start to play with my fingers.

"what would happen if you went outside?"

"i dunno, i guess my heart, head or lungs would explode. . ."

"how could you joke about this," the brunette boy seemed frustrated for some reason. i tried not to think about it.

"how can i not?" i shrug. "i try to want the things i can't have,"

"damn, are you a zen master too?"

"it takes time to learn," i smile back. his foot taps a little to the beat of fly me to moon plays in the background.

"what's one place you would want to visit?" he says. it feels almost like fast fives on messages. "other than outer space of course,"

i grin as i think about the one place i would love to be.

"europe," i say without a hesitation. i sigh with satisfaction. "the people, the food, and the scenery. someday i want to become a singer and travel the world." i glance down at my plain adidas superstars and sigh once again.

"do you want me to describe it for you?"  i nod my head impatiently waiting for a description of a dream that would never come true for me.
"well there's a lot of people who yell at you in a foreign language, you can't find directions and there's always soo many people."

"i guess you don't like traveling?"

"i do, it's just the really popular places with a lot of crowded people that you can't even enjoy the day place."

i was about to say something in reply before shawn burst through the door.

"okay, twenty minutes is done. you didn't touch  right?" he spills all the words out in less than ten seconds. he grabs farkle's shoulders and walks behind him.

"no touching, right maya? " farkle looks over at me and for some reason i blush. the way he says my names makes it all seem right.

"nope," i answer. and that ended the twenty minutes.

❁

hi beautiful readers!
i hope y'all are enjoying the book!
please vote for this book for best markle at @ / projectgmw.  it would mean the world to me if we won!!

much love,
saerin <33