This is a wasteland.

Don't need your love.

I woke up feeling in my own bed with a massive headache and feeling sick to my stomach, I looked at the time and it was half past 10 in the morning so I decided to get up.

Out in the kitchen I found Em and Rydel looking as alive as I felt, "Good morning ladies" I said but my voice was almost gone, "It's not a good morning" Em mumbled and Rydel just hummed in agreement. "So when did we get home last night? Cause it's a bit blurry" I asked.

"We got back around 5 this morning, I think we took a cab because I have a lot of unread messages sent to Rocky and Riker" Rydel giggled, "Rocky's calling me!" Em exclaimed.
She put him on speaker.

- Good morning honey
- Hi Rock your on speaker!
- Right, Good morning Delly and good morning Monster.
- Good morning Rocky.. we said in unison.
- So Rocky why aren't you guys at the apartment?
- We decided to sleep at the house last night and you guys never texted us to get you?
- We did but I think you guys were asleep..
- At 5 in the morning most people are asleep girl.. Rikers voice was in the background.
- whatever can you guys bring iHop and Starbucks pretty please! Rydel pleaded.
- we'll be there in 20.

My headache was extreme and the hungover was a fucking bitch, we were all laying in the living room waiting for our breakfast. Em has put up a bucket in case someone needed to throw up witch was a really good idea, "I feel like I'm going to die.." I rasped out.
"Me to but we had a lot of fun last night" Em trailed of, she took out her phone and showed us her snap story and I saw myself dancing with a really cute guy, a really big guy were grinding on Rydel whom looked really drunk and we all laughed and looked through the pictures from last night until Rydel squealed and I groaned.

"For fuck same Delly, my head" I exclaimed. "Molly you NEED to see this.." she said with a laugh and I looked at her phone and there was a picture of me and a guy in a full on make out session with a lot of hands.

"OMFG guys you need to delete that!" I said as loud as I could. Before they could answer the door opened and the five boys came in, "Delete what?" Riker smiled, "Oh nothing just a really bad picture of me" I rasped. "I can only guess what went down last night from Em's story and your voice, and you guys look like shit" Rocky chuckled and we all just gave him the finger.

As the smell of food filled the apartment I felt my stomach turning inside out, "Bucket.." I rasped and Em was quick to hand me the bucket and right in time I'll add.

"Wow are you okay?" Riker asked as Rydel held my hair. "Yep, just peachy.." I groaned.

We all sat down in the living room to eat our food and drink our coffee, we talked about the crazy night we had and I was feeling good until Rydel and Em decided to start showing pictures, "Don't, Rydel please!" I exclaimed.
"Come one it's funny!" She laughed and showed the boys the picture of the make out session and everybody laughed and teased me except Ross and I could feel his eyes on me.

I stood up and went in to my bathroom, I needed to shower and get my thoughts straight.

When I came back in to my room after the shower I wasn't that surprised to find Ross waiting on my bed, I went over to my closet to get some close and quickly change in to a pair of sweatpants and a big shirt.

"I just want to know something.." Ross trailed of and I gave him a small nod and waited for him to continue, "Did you go home with him last night?" He asked and I sighed, "No Ross, I didn't fuck him" I said tiredly, "That's not what I asked" "No but that what's on your mind isn't it?" I gave him a look.

We sat there in silence for a while, "Ross I told you I didn't want a relationship, and whatever this is or was it started to feel like one.." I trailed of without looking at him, "I know that Molly.. I just.." " You thought that would change? Just like everybody else does but I'm sorry it doesn't" I snapped, he looked a bit taken back and without a word he stood up and left my room.

I know that I just got a second chance and that I blew it but I also new it was for the best, I'm not good for him and this is my way of protecting him.

I got up and walked out to the others, everybody was just chilling and talking about everything and nothing and I just sat down by Riker and put my headphones in and slowly drifted of against Rikers shoulder.

I was woken up maybe three hours later by someone lightly shaking me, "No I don't wanna get up" I grumbled, "Come on princess it's pizza in the kitchen" I looked at him with tired eyes and got up walking in to the kitchen.

"Well hello there sleeping beauty" Em smiled, "Very funny, this headache is killing me" I groaned as I took a piece of pizza sitting on the counter, Ross barley looked at me and I understood him but Riker was starting to notice the tension. "Wait you still got a headache? Mine went away about 1-2 hours ago" Rydel said, "Yes and I feel like my head is about to explode.." I was a bit scared cause it hurt like a bitch and I had never experienced something like this.

"Maybe you should go back to the hospital to get that checked out?" Rocky asked with a concerned look on his face, "I think I will" I mumbled, "I'll drive you!" Riker smiled, "Riker you're r supposed to drive me to the audition" Ross spoke up, "It's fine Riker I'll take an Uber" I smiled but he insisted that they could come with me cause Ross audition was in about 2,5 hour and I didn't have the energy to argue so I just thanked him and got all of the stuff I needed.

I was laying down in the back seat with a bucket in case I had to throw up again, the pain was increasing every minute and I didn't know what to do. Ross and Riker were singing along to the radio making my head throb but I couldn't say anything because the pain was so intense I felt paralyzed, my eyes watered and I hated to cry in front of people but I couldn't stop it.

I felt so helpless and small, I needed the pain to go away. The music stopped and I felt a hand on my arm so I turned my head, Ross was looking at me with his beautiful concerned eyes and I kept crying without making a sound. "Does it hurt that bad?" He asked in a hushed tone and I gave him a small nod as a confirmation, "Riker you need to speed up, she's in really much pain" He said with a voice lazed with worry.

When we arrived the pain was so intense that I couldn't even open my eyes because the light burned, Ross and Riker were holding me from each side to make sure I didn't fall or walk in to something. Riker talked to the front desk as Ross sat down with me, I was still crying and all I wanted was to be numb.

"Molly, everything will be okay.. I understand that you're in pain but the doctors will help you" He whispered in my ear as he took my hand. I felt a calm spreading trough my body as I heard his calming voice, I needed him here more than I would ever imagine. I hated that I needed him, I knew that if I gave in everything would be okay but I was so afraid.

"Ross..?" I whispered, "Yes?" "Please don't let go.." I said as I squeezed his hand, his thumb slowly stroked the back of my hand.

"I won't let go princess"