Never Forget You (Niall Horan Fan Fic)

Chapter 23

Ashley's POV

I sit outside, I didn't really leave and go home, I just walked out to sit on the steps. I start to sob, hearing Luke talk about Ashton on the podium.

This is my fault, and they don't know it except for Emily, I don't know what to do anymore.

The wind blows slightly, I look up to see an envelope falling from the breeze right in front of me. On it, it says

Ashley

I pick it up and open it to read it. it says:

Dear Ashley, Once again I did it. And this time it wasn't hard. Oh there was so many seringes and medicines I could have slowly killed him with but I felt sorry for the poor little guy. Your little speech a minute ago shocked me. Now did he really say that? I can't believe you haven't found me yet. Hint hint for you I'm your enemy but I know you. I kind of gave it away, oh well, things are going to end soon. I  promise, I'm really sorry I did this to you. But I had to do what I had to do. This will be the last note you're getting. Sorry, too many hints.

Luke walks out sitting down next to me.

"I had to leave that place. To much crying and emotion in there." he says.

"Yeah, me too. I guess I told a little to much, especially in gods house."

"So, Ashton kissing you? Was that real, or for to make Amelia jealous?"

"Luke why would you think I would lie at Ashton'

s funeral and in church!"

"Well for starters you and Amelia have been at each other's necks trying to blame one another for all this."

"Yes, but that doesn't mean I would lie about this. That's just wrong. It is. And I just have so many secrets in my mind. I don't know what to do with them."

"Ashley, I know  you've been hiding secrets from me. I remember last year, it was the day after new years and Morgan had to go to your house really quickly cause something was wrong. No one would tell me about it...."

Flashback:

Everyone says when it's a New Year, you can start all over. In my case, I can't. Look at all these scars. They're all over my body. Ashton is at Michael's and I told him I would stay home. I look at my complexion in the mirror. Horrible. Thoughts go after another and before I know it, my blade from the drawer is deep in my skin, making new scars and opening old ones. I text Morgan, Mackenzie, Emily, and Ashton.

-Help, I hurt myself, bad, I can't go on- Ashley

Out of Flashback:

"I just got hurt." I say hiding my wrists from Luke. He notices the sudden body language change. I get uncomfortable and slide a little bit over on the steps. He slides closer to me.

"How did you get hurt?" He says making emphasis on did.

"Uh, I fell down the stairs." I say sweating and looking away at some trees in the distance.

"Oh funny, in your's and Ashton's flat you didn't have stairs. Ashley you can't hide it from me any longer."

He right, him Michael and Calum are the brothers I wish I had. But I cannot afford for another person to know. Not even Michael knew, and we were really close. 

Morgan walks out to join us.

"What are you guys talking about?" She asks.

"Morgan, I know this isn't a good place to ask, but what happened to Ashley last year after New Years?" He says turning his back to me.

She looks at me and says,

"Please Ashley, just tell him."

"No Morgan, I can't let another person find out."

"Ashley, you told me Luke is like your little brother that you could tell anything to. So why don't you tell him?"

"I'm gonna have to let time pass, and then tell him. Not even Michael knew about this. Calum doesn't either. Only Ashton was the only boy that I ever told."

"Secrets don't make friends Ashley, nor brothers." Luke tells me. I want to force myself to get up and walk off. But I would be to weak to look back.

"Ashley please tell him, or I will. I will tell him even your life story."

"Morgan don't do that please!"

"What do you not trust me or something? Did I do anything to you. If I did I'm really sorry." Luke says.

I bury my wrists into my jacket pockets.

"No one did anything to me except for Amelia. No I do trust you, I just don't want to talk about it." I raise my voice a little, accidently.

"Please Ashley, whisper it to me."

"No. I've said this millions of times, and it's no."

 He pauses for a second.

I'm ruining two friendships already. I think to myself.

I think for a second and I pull out my phone, and text Luke.

-You wanna know it? I cut.- Ashley