She's SO Messy | Z.H fanfic

Worst-7

7:00 am

BEEP BEEP BEEP! Is what I heard for the last 3 minutes, filling my ears. Filling my brain.  My heart skipped a beat for a while. I sat on the bed staring at the ceiling, breathing heavily. This wasn't because I was scared of the alarm, it was because I scared myself. It makes me feel powerful, dare I say confidently. Like I could do anything. I've never had this feeling before. I have to keep my fingers on a pulse. I feel like going outside. It's not something I do very often unless I need to but I really want to. I get up and kinda just put on some clothes. Things that might not go together, I want to be indifferent. Today at least. I have butterflies. Lots of them. Who am I trying to impress? Prove a point to? I could ask the same question. 
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FUCK! LOGAN TRIED to text me and I had no idea! I'm probably slowing them down without knowing! He says that he recently bought his new house and he wants my brother and his girlfriend, the Why Don't We boys, and Jake to stay there for a week to see what it looks like and enjoy it. Jake recently got his Team 10 house, too. So you'd know why Jake isn't going to be here. But he didn't invite us to his house. Well, I mean, he could've just not invited me. Which is fine. I get people don't like me and- wait. Jake's my cousin. Like, blood-related cousin. He can dislike me or whatever. It bothers me but not too much. Yeah? Yeah.

I walk up to the door of Logan's new house and stare at it. It's so depreciated from his other house. I sent a chill down my spine. I ring the doorbell and my legs are now not on the ground. David answers the door with his loud personality and picks me up. He's crazy. He runs over to the circle that everyone's in and puts me down. I wobble my arms trying to balance myself due to epilepsy and/or quick movements. They mess the shit out of my brain. I almost fall down until David helps me stay up. I put my hand in my hair and I just sigh for a second. I sit next to Logan and I almost don't pay attention to him. Someone that catches my eye is a girl that keeps trying to catch my glance almost. Every time I look near her she tries to catch my eyes. She is trying to catch my glance! I wonder why. It's a girl with short brown hair, mixed skin, and her makeup is on point! I instantly catch her glance and smile my big smile. My dimples are deep. Like really deep. After Logan finishes talking, he says that we could do whatever until we had to choose our rooms for the week. I am honestly so excited for this! The girl I described earlier is walking over to me with glares going left and right. 
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SHE TELLS ME to go to the corner with her. She starts grabbing onto my shirt telling me to back off her "man"?? 
"Look, "Danielle"," She says with an attitude. What did I do wrong?
"What," I laugh out of embarrassment.
"I need you to get the hell off of David" She whispers/yells. I can't tell. I can't hear or see very well now. Constant screams of my conscience fill my brain. I can't run. I can't scream. I can't do anything. She's quite short so I chuckle for effect?
"Uh, sorry? I guess? I mean I can't really. I've been with him for as long as I've lived so It'll be impossible for me to not see my brother" I laugh even louder than last time. At this point, I'm not looking at her at all. She lets go of my shirt as I start laughing and get a few people's attention. I shake my head vigorously to kinda remove stress. She puts a hand on my shoulder and I jump at the quick movement.  
"Sorry. I'm Liza. David's girlfriend" Liza says while smiling. I put on a fake-ish smile and laugh a little.  Logan runs over to me and grabs my hand. He pulls me over to these boys again. I laugh and wave to Liza. We laugh about it. Now I wonder why I'm over here with these kids. 

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"SO YOU GUYS know Danny already. Hi, Danny" Logan says waving to me when we're right next to each other. I wave to him with a laugh. I feel powerful. Confident, no. Maybe. I feel like I could do anything. Maybe not everything but, the majority. Then someone tries to catch my gaze. Zach. And only Zach. I get stiff. I calm down a little but just enough to say,
"Hey, I'mma go to te...the...  bathroom. Logan where's your ba...bathroom" I clench my jaw. I'm not sad nor mad. Just overwhelmed? It's one of the three for sure. 
"Yeah down the hallway to the left." He says, pointing at the hallway.
"Thanks" I manage to say. It's not normal. The bathroom is so... gone. So artificial. There's nothing alive in here. I glide my thumb across the walls, feeling every part of concrete and stone. Man-made, you can tell. Made to look real, but it's just as dead as the rest as the walls. I sit on the counter, breathing in and out. My hand in my hair, my head is spinning. It's an all gender bathroom. Girls and boys use this. Thanks, Logan. Now I'm not sure if I'll be in solitude or isolation. A person walks in, could you guess? Zach of course. 
"Hey, you alright?" His voice soothing, calm, understanding. It gives me butterflies. I look down at my legs that are dangling from the tabletop.  Zach jumps on the tabletop beside me. Trying to find my glance or eyes. I might still have feelings for him. Do I forgive him? 64% Of me does. The other 36% is angry. Very angry. He lifts my chin to match his eyes with mine. He's searching my eyes to make sure this is okay. This as in us. Are we okay? Is this relationship okay? It's a start. I give him a small smirk, a grin almost. He pulls me close, our lips an inch away. I can feel the heat of his body on mine. I want to stop myself, my conscience. That 36% of me is burning. Making me get heated. Not blushing or getting flustered, my anger is towards this human being is beyond normal. I calm myself down and get a little cooler as he brings his lips toward mine. We move synchronously, it's liked we've dreamed from this. He puts his hand in my hair, pulling me closer. It was heated. It felt like hours when in reality it's only been 2 minutes. After we kissed, we're still on the counter. We're still an inch away from each other. His hand is still in my hair. We're admiring each other's eyes. He's searching my eyes for.. well I don't know this time. He's just searching my eyes. My crystal blue eyes. I don't want this to end. Not at all. I look down, searching for answers and resolutions. He jumps off the tabletop and reaches for my hand. My give my hand to him and say, "I'm better than alright." answering his question from before. Our fingers are intertwined, but he let's go. I understand why. I look up at him and give him a small smile. We don't want Logan and the boys to think we did something bad. Well, not too bad anyways. We walk out to everyone playing Uno. I sit next to Zach while Logan passes out the cards.

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8:00pm

AFTER OUR GAME of Uno, Logan says he's choosing our rooms for us. Oh ho okay. Everyone in here has a girlfriend or boyfriend except Zach and I. Well, not for long anyway. So their rooms go like this, Jonah and Grace, Maddie and Jack, David and Liza, Logan and Evan and lastly, Zach and I. The rest of the boys either wanted to stay home or with their girlfriends. We walk into the room, also fake. What could you expect from Logan? Being cheap. I lay my bag down and sit on the bed. There is only one bed. Logan is very very retarded. I don't have the heart to go up to him and say so. I get up and see the desk thing that's in the room. Today is Saturday, which means I don't upload today. Every month I do this thing where if I go anywhere special, I make a weekly vlog about it. Like for Monday's I upload a vlog for Monday on Monday. Like a daily vlog for a week. Still examining the desk, Zach comes up behind me and put his arms on my waist. He puts his head in the crook of my neck. He kisses my cheek and let's go. It sends a chill down my spine. Not only do I love- no like him, I'm falling into his deep brown eyes. It's like a spell, but it's deeply contagious. We get into bed, him being the taller one in the back, and I doze off. His arm is around my waist and felt safe, almost. I think of animals and leaves falling off of a tree. That's falling. I'm running and running and it doesn't matter how fast I run, one of those trees are going to fall on me. I'm alone. Scared. I've lost sanity. I'm isolated from human contact. I jolt up still under the covers and I shiver at the thought. I go back to sleep and calm my breathing down. I'm dozing off now.. . .     . .