When. (Our Second Life)

Chapter 17

After I showed Trevor my scars and told him about my past, he carried me upstairs so we could hang out in my room. We watched Netflix on my laptop, and when it got late enough we went to bed. Although, I didn't really sleep. I kinda just laid there thinking.

The fire I wanted wasn't there anymore between Trevor and I. I love him, but he feels more like a best friend. I guess one way I could describe it is its like having 'benefits' with your best friend. God I'm such a bitch.

I can't believe I'm about I do this to Trevor. He's so committed and loving and caring... He's too good for me.

I think I want a break. Maybe not forever, I might just find that I really do miss him... but for now, I just want to have a break.

I fall asleep, planning out our conversation. But it was hard, since his arm was wrapped around me, reminding me how much he loves me, reminding me how much I'm going to break his heart.

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As I open my eyes, aware of Trevor's arm still around my waist. I sat up and grabbed the wheelchair that was next to the couch and carefully slipped myself into it. I rolled myself to the kitchen to get some food. If I was going to do this, it was not going to be on an empty stomach.

I grabbed a banana and juice. I heard Trevor get up, and I prepared myself for what I was about to do.

"Good morning, Ro." He said sweetly. He gave me a quick peck on the cheek as he walked by to get something from the fridge.

I suddenly felt ashamed. I can't do this... I don't think I could even survive without him. I don't know what has gotten into me lately, but it needs to stop.

I give him a small smile as we make our way to the table.

I reached down and itched my leg.

Wait. My leg isn't supposed to itch... I'm not even supposed to be able to feel them.

"Oh my God." I'm shocked. Trevor looks at me with a weird/worried look on his face.

"You okay?" he asks.

"Um, yeah..." I say. "I can feel my legs." I am starting to realize how great this is. "I can feel my legs!!! OH MY GOD!"

"OH MY GOD!!!" Trevor yells.

We kind of sit there excitedly, but kind of awkward because we don't know what to do.

The he stands up and offers me his hand. I take it, unsure, and try to stand. As soon as I'm on my feet I stumble and fall, but he catches me. I look up at him and smile at my clumsiness, and then try again. This time, I can stand with him as he supports me. We walk a few steps, then he suddenly lets go. I make my way across the kitchen, and by the time I'm walking back I can walk almost normally.

When I reach Trevor, I wrap my arms around him tightly.

"I'm so glad your better, Ro." he tells me. "I love you."

Damn. I remembered my thoughts from before... how I almost broke up with him. I now realize I don't love him, but I do still like him - a lot.

I don't want to lie, but I don't want to just leave his words floating in awkwardness. So I say something... not a lie, but not completely the truth, either.

"Me too."

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*Trevor's POV*

As we stood there, I held her close. She felt tense, but maybe that was just because she had just walked for the first time in weeks.

It's weird how aware I am of her. It's like she's a part of me. She's my everything.

I reach my lips down to hers and gently kiss her.

This was my favorite kind of kiss. No, it wasn't a huge make-out sesh, but it was a sweet and beautiful kind of thing. Don't get me wrong, I love making out with her, but this was just more sentimental.

"You wanna try the stairs?" I ask.

She nods up at me, and I take her hand and gently guide her to the staircase. I take the first few stairs, then turn around to help her. At least, I thought she would need help, but she just went for it. She went up the whole flight, then skipped to her room. I laughed and followed her.

"You have no idea how great it feels to be able to come up here without Sam carrying me!" She exclaimed.

Ouch. That hurt. A pang of jealousy shot through my veins. I quickly recover my expression, so she didnt see.

"I bet." I say.

She flopped down on her bed and sprawled out.

"I usually slept downstairs. They always had to bring me my clothes and bathroom stuff." she says.

I plopped down next to her and took her in my arms. I know I shouldn't be jealous of my best friends, but I did feel bad for not being here for her. It should've been me taking care of her, not Sam.

As I breathed in her scent, I remembered that they are my best friends, and that I have nothing to worry about. I should trust them, just as I should trust Rose.

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*Rose's POV*

It felt so good to walk again. Although, I think I gained some weight from all that sitting around... My stomach has rolls, my thigh gap is gone, and my arms are thicker. I frowned as I looked upon myself, planning to skip lunch.

On a happier note, we called the boys, who had slept over at Jenn and Andrea's, and told them the good news. They were all excited, and we planned to do something fun tomorrow to celebrate.

So, Trevor and I decided that today would be our day, and we'd walk around town and do anything we wanted.

"Hey, I'm gonna get ready. I think you left some clothes somewhere around here..." I say, standing and rummaging around my room to find him some fresh clothes. He just laid on my bed, watching me. "If I can't find any, you can borrow some from someone else. Wait, nevermind, I found some!"

I hand him his shorts and t-shirt that he left here before. He also left a beanie, but I decided I would wear that today.

"You change here, I'm going in the bathroom." I say.

I walk in my bathroom and slip on the outfit I decided to wear: a striped flowy tank from American Eagle, some low-waisted jean shorts from Forever21, and some black gladiator sandals. I put in some simple studded earrings, some friendship bracelets Sam made me, and did my makeup. Today's makeup was simple, just eyeliner, mascara, and blush. I put on some EOS chapstick, sprayed some perfume, and braided my hair to the side. I slid on Trevors beanie, and when I was satisfied with my appearance, I left.

When I came out of the bathroom, I didn't see Trevor, so I assumed he was down in the kitchen. I grabbed my phone and some money and walked toward my door. Only when I reached the doorway, Trevor jumped out and scared the crap out of me! I screamed bloody murder, then when I realized it was him, I slapped his arm.

"TREVOR!" I yell, laughing.

"I got you good!" he said, smiling like a devil child.

"Stop, you freaked me out!" I say.

He just laughed at me, and we walked down the stairs and out the door hand in hand.

"Nice hat," he commented, poking at my head.

"Thanks, it's designer!" I say, flipping my "weave".

I'm glad I decided to stay with Trevor. I know I would've regretted it if I didn't. He makes me happy, and that's what matters.

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A/N: This took FOREVER to write, you have no idea. But hope you like it!

Ily!

~Hannah