Sad, Beautiful, Tragic

Chapter Six

Harry's POV
I didn't want to leave but I had to, Chant texted me and told me to meet him at CreekWood Mall. I sigh and push Louis lightly off of me and cover him with a blanket. I turn off the tv that was still on and head towards the door. I pull my shoes on and grab my black leather jacket that the devils forced me to buy. I write a note to Louis, telling him that I would be out but that I'll be back later. I also tell him to eat something, I hate seeing him so small and skinny.
I head out to my car and drive towards the mall.
***
Once I get there the assholes are hanging out in the parking lot near the entrance on the left. I park my car and head towards them. I cough at the smell of smoke from the cigarettes that they're smoking.
"Give me your phone!" Is the first thing that Tate says to me. I'm about to protest but know I'll lose anyways and toss it to him. He catches it and begins to type. After a few minutes he tosses it back to me.
"Boo bear," he mocks. "Will be here in 10 minutes." He finishes.
"What the fuck?!" I yell.
He ignores me. "When he gets here I want you to cuss him out and tell him to kill himself." He laughs while Chant joins in. Oh god no. What if he actually believes I mean that? Nononononononono.
The minutes pass by like hours but Louis finally appears in his mom's car. He parks near us and glances at me, offering me a smile but I know he's nervous.
He gets out and heads towards us while Chant yells something at me. My palms begin to sweat and my feet get tingly. Haven't I caused him enough harm? It seems like the only thing I do is make him cry.
"Hey." He says, walking up to me while Chant and Tate yell insults at him from behind me. I take a deep breath and internally scream at myself for what I'm about to say.
"What the fuck are you doing here?!" I yell and push him up to the car behind him.
He gives me a worried look and practically begs me to let him be with his eyes.
"You texted me and told me to." He whispers.
I fake a scoff. "I didn't think you were actually fucking dumb enough to believe it! God damn you're a dumbass!" I yell at him. He looks down. God damn it Harry what're you doing?!
"I'm sorry." He whispers. Why does he believe me?!
"You should be! Maybe you should just kill yourself!" I scream. He looks back up at me with wet cheeks and watery eyes.
He pushes me away with mass strength that I didn't even know he had. I could tell that this was the last straw. I had already beat him up and insulted him. He told me he cut and starved himself and he expected me to take care of him and I will but I guess that this was just to much. I'm such a dick.
"Maybe I will!" He yells back. No no no. "If you want me to I will! Maybe I'll go home right now and down a bottle of pills or MAYBE I'll hang myself! OR maybe I could slit my wrists! But I think I've cut up my wrists enough already huh?! Hmm, what do you think Harry?!" He yells through tears.
Chant and Tate continue to laugh while I grab his arm when he tries to run back to his car. "LET ME GO!" He screams. "You know, I actually thought you loved me for a minute there but I guess I was wrong once again! You're just like everyone else! Everyone wants me to kill and cut myself! Even my parents have given up on me but I thought you were different! Oh, and for the record, I actually HAVENT been eating! Remember the other day when you made me eat dinner? Yeah, right after you went home I puked it up. I hope you're happy." He says, pulling his arm away. I'm paralyzed. My feet refuse to move. What the fuck is wrong with me. I watch as he drives away and I'm about to get in my own car when Chant and Tate stop me. I'm not about to let my boyfriend die because of these douches. I punch Tate straight in the jaw, making him fall to the ground and when Chant is about to hit me, I kick I'm in his "manhood".
I get in my car and speed to Louis' house. His car is in the driveway and I run into his house.
"Louis?!" I yell. No answer. Shit shit shit.
I run up to his room and see him with a gun in his hand.
"Louis, d-" I say but I'm cut off.
"Get any closer and I'll do it!" He yells, holding the gun to his head.
I stop moving and hold my breath.
"Did you really want me to do it?!" He yells at me.
"Of course not baby. I only said it cause of them." I respond.
He scoffs. "Yep. Because you obviously had no power over them."
I look down at my feet but hold back the tears, I need to be strong for him now. I look back up at him.
"Please don't boo bear." I whisper, still holding back the tears.
He looks straight at me, his red, swollen eyes locking with my watery green ones.
"If you do it then I promise you I will kill myself too." I say, the tears finally pouring.
"You don't care enough Harry." He whispers, pulling the trigger but nothing happens. He pulls it again but still nothing happens.
"If I didn't care enough I wouldn't have taken the bullets." I whisper.
"Fuck you Harry!" He yells, throwing the gun at me but I dodge it. He finally collapses to the ground and sobs. I go over to him and pull him into my chest.
"I want to die!" He screams.
"No boo bear." I say through tears.
"Why won't you let me die?!" He sobs into my chest.
"I love you." I whisper.
He sobs even harder and gets up from my lap. I grow worried but calm down when he collapses into his bed. He buries his face in a pillow. I get up and lay down next to him. He faces me, our noses almost touching. His fringe covers his eyes but I move it away, revealing his puffy, bloodshot eyes.
He takes his hand up to my face and plays with my lip piercing that I was forced into. I smile and remember when he told me how I looked good with piercings. I didn't really agree with this but I decided not to protest.
"Louis?" I whispered.
He responded by looking up to my eyes.
"Don't ever do that again." I say.
He doesn't respond and just rolls over so he's facing away from me. I sigh and get up. "I'll be back."
He doesn't say anything which hurts a little. Usually he would've protested. What if he doesn't want to be my boyfriend anymore?
I go downstairs and begin to collect anything that could be harmful to him, throwing it into an empty garbage bag. I collect knives from the kitchen, a few jump ropes from his back yard, some pencil sharpeners in his dad's office, some deadly medication from the medicine cabinets. I take blades from when he would self harm from the bathroom. I even take some of his mum's hair things that he could burn himself with. I go back to the bedroom and pick up the gun, tossing it into the garbage bag. Obviously I wasn't going to throw all this stuff away, his parents would be pissed. Instead, I stuff the bag and all of it's contents into the back of their coat closet. I'll tell them about it when they get back. They'll probably send him to a treatment center or something, I hope.
When I walk back into Louis' bedroom he's sitting on the end of his bed with his head in his hands. I hear him crying and sit next to him. The bed dips down a decent amount when I sit because of my weight over him. I put my arms around him and pull him to my side but he pushes away. He scoots to the other side of the bed and faces away from me. I guess he did believe I was against him all this time.
"Louis, please." I say, scooting towards him again but he scoots further away.
"Please." I say, my voice now barely above a whisper.
He looks at me with watery eyes and tear stained cheeks. "I just need some time alone." He says.
"I'll be downstairs." I reply, getting up from the bed. He was about to say something but he stopped when his voice cracked. He began to grow into sobs again. I tried to comfort him but he only pushed me away. I know I deserved this. I wish I was the one who was sad. I know how selfish that sounds but at the same time Louis doesn't deserve any of this.
I stalked down the steps into his living room. With his parents being gone and the school year being over, I would probably stay with him until they were back. I locked all the doors and windows, afraid that Chant and Tate might come over, being pissed. They didn't know where Louis lives but they have their ways, I've learned that much. It was already 18:00 and I decided I should make us dinner. So, I went into the kitchen and started making grilled cheese sandwiches. After only 10 minutes I had 2 made for Lou and 2 for me. I put them on plates and set them on the table. I walked tiredly back up the stairs and into Lou's bedroom. I poked my head through the door and saw him at the end of his bed with his phone in his hand but his eyes looked tired and bloodshot.
"Dinner's ready." I said.
Without looking at me he threw his phone on his bed and walked past me. I hated this. As he stalked down the steps and into the kitchen I followed behind him. I tried to pull a chair out for him but instead he took my chair so, I sat in his with a sigh.
He picked at his food before speaking up. "My parents are in America for the next three weeks, it was only planned as one." He said while looking at his plate. "So I guess you're stuck with me till then." He continued.
"Not a bad thing love." I said with a smile. I took another bite of my sandwich while he hadn't even touched his.
"Lou, eat please." I said. I kinda sounded like my mum.
"Not hungry." He said.
"Louis, you haven't eaten for 3 days." I scolded.
"So." He spoke.
"So, it's not healthy. You're lighter then a feather as it is. If you don't like your weight them there are a lot healthier methods."
He ignored me and kept staring at his full plate.
"If you don't eat you'll die Louis." My voice cracked and my eyes began to well up again. This has been a really emotional past few days huh?
"That wouldn't be so bad." He mumbled.
"Louis, please eat." I whisper.
"Fine!" He yells, sloppily stuffing food in his mouth and without chewing he swallows. "I'll just puke it up later! But I bet you won't mind huh?!" He yells, running into the bathroom. I put my elbows on the table and my head in my hands. I begin to sob but suddenly become frustrated. I begin pulling on my hair but that's not enough. I kick the wall and start to punch it but not hard enough for it to break. After my tantrum I feel better but Louis hasn't come out of the bathroom. I go over and try to open the door but it's locked, of course. I grab a paper clip that's sitting on a desk in the room next to the bathroom and open the door with that. Louis is sitting next to the toilet and the horrible scent of vomit fills my nose. It almost makes me want to puke. Louis looks worn out and green sitting on the floor. I go over and sit across from him but he gestures for me to sit next to him, so I do. He leans down and puts his head in my lap. I brush the hair out of his face and cringe when I feel vomit beneath my fingers that was in his hair.
"Lou." I say.
He mumbles in response.
"Come on baby, let's get you cleaned up." I say.
He groans but sits up. I get up from the floor and help him up.
"Get in the shower love, I'll bring you in some pajamas and a towel." I say.
He nods and I close the door. I go upstairs to his room and grab a long sleeve shirt, pajama pants and boxers. I also grab his blue towel and head back towards the bathroom. Once I hear the water running I open the door and put the towel on the towel rack next to the shower. I then put his clothes on the counter.
"Your clothes are on the counter babe." I say.
"Okay." He responds.
"You okay?" I ask after a few seconds.
"I'm hungry." He says. I smile.
"What are you hungry for?" I say, my smile practically audible.
"Mmm, poptarts." He says.
I laugh lightly. "Okay love. I'll go find some poptarts." I respond and go into the kitchen. I go through his drawers and cabinets and finally find the snack. I decide just to leave them in the package for him to eat while we watch a movie or something. Once I hear the water stop from the bathroom I bring the package with me to the outside of the door.
"You okay baby?" I call from the door.
After a few seconds he answers, bringing me relief "Fine love." He replies, opening the door. I smile at him which he returns. We sit down on his bed and I hand him the opened package. He breaks off a piece of the snack and puts it in his mouth.
"Wanna watch a movie?" I ask.
He replies by shaking his head no and laying his head on my lap while still looking up at me. I watch as he continues to eat. This makes me so unbearably happy. I put my hand under his shirt and rub circles in his hip with my finger while he smiles up at me. I return the smile and place a soft kiss to his forehead.
"You know you're gonna have to go to treatment, right?" I ask.
"Yeah, but my parents aren't gonna pay for that Harry. They've tried before but look where I am now?" He says sadly.
"Then I'll pay for it." I say with a smile.
"I'm not gonna let you do that, plus my parents would have to sign it." He says with an eye roll.
I look at him confused. "But you're 18." I reply.
His face suddenly lightens up. Did he just now realize that?!
"Oh my god! You're right! I can move out, do whatever the hell I want!" He practically yells, sitting up. Oh Lou Bear, you're crazy.