Guided by secrets

Memories

The picture above shows Harper crying, who you will meet later in this chapter.

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I opened a book with a dusty, brown cover. I could almost feel a shadow casting up upon me from long ago. I saw this brunette girl jumping on a blue, velvet covered bed, excitedly reaching to get the very book I was holding now. She got out a black pen, sat cross-legged on the bed and started writing on a fresh page. I looked down at my diary and turned the page.

"Diary...I'm going to call you diary, because 'Dear Diary' sounds too princessy. Ha, I bet Harper writes 'Dear Diary' to every single one of her entries!" Harper was a friend of mine in 7th Grade. At least she thought so. She was more of a tease-behind-her-back-but-without-her-knowing friend to me. I continued reading.

"Well, today was okay. I didn't expect it to be any more or less than 'okay' anyway. I was invited to Harper's birthday party less than a week ago, and of course, I was delighted to go. Delighted to mess with her head a little bit. She won't mind. She never minds."

"10 o'clock. Damn, I thought...how did her parents ever agree to her having a midnight party? Her party is in her garden, now beautifully decorated with a few balloons and ribbons hung on trees. It was more like a tea party than a teenage party in my opinion. "Hey Harper! Happy birthday girl!" I spotted her between some other people. Maybe her cousins, because they looked wayyy young. "Omigosh! Hi Cleo! I'm so glad you came!" She exclaimed. "Well I said so, didn't I?" I smiled. Most of the time, I feel like Harper and I are in a relationship, and that I am the 'bad' boy and she's the happy little innocent girl. I like the sound of that. That's why I'm her friend: because she obviously NEEDS help. Like, her face is just screaming for a makeover. Like, no offence Harper! I'm trying to do a good deed here, okay? I'm trying to help somebody into becoming a normal human being!"

I looked up again. Wow...I did have a very twisted mind back then...in a good way! Now that I think about it, if that kid writing that diary wasn't me, I'd want to adopt her. Seriously, she seems really cool!

"I cannot believe Harper played Truth or Dare and Seven minutes in Heaven at her party. That is seriously so...'mature' of Harper? Anyways, that maturity (if there was any, I even bet you she googled 'Party games' to come up with some reasonable ones) quickly was erased, as she put the stupidest dares. I mean "walk around and pretend to be a chicken"? Who does that?

A sweet innocent little girl, I answer.

At least Seven Minutes in Heaven was better. Me and this boy from my year, Louis, were put into this tiny room in Harper's house. I think it's the 'laundry room' now.

Let me tell you something about Louis: I very much dislike him. And he really does love me. How did that happen? One day, he called me a dirty word which I do not repeat in case people see/hear me and I get into trouble. I got mad so I punched him. Don't judge me, he totally deserved it. Plus he said so a few days after the incident. And he told me that he really liked the 'dynamic' type. And I'm just there like: "umm..okayy..". Because I didn't like him. Or anyone. It's just me being me and dealing with stuff.

The problem is: Harper really liked Louis, and you can imagine how she was when the bottle landed on me and Louis for Seven Minutes in Heaven. That's why she pulled me out of the crowd at around midnight. "What did you do with Louis in that room?" She demanded. And I answered honestly: "Harper, I hate to disappoint you so much but we didn't do anything. Not even talk. Seriously, that guy is boooring!" I fake yawned. "Hmm.." she replied.

I got pretty pissed at her for not believing me at first. That's what she's supposed to do, believe what her elders tell her! After that, we went back to the party and pretended that nothing had happened.

The party finished at around 1:30. Everyone had left and I was about to, when I heard a cry from indoors. Harper was on her bed, crying her heart out.

"Harper what's wrong?" I managed to say. She was quite shocked and jerked her head up in a swift motion. Obviously, she wasn't expecting me to see her. "What is wrong? You dare ask me that? Well, let's see: EVERYTHING Oh is! You just took Louis away from me!" Whaaaat? Hello, I'm the one who told her they look good together in the first place! And second of all, I despise Louis. Another sign that she's totally an innocent little girl, as she thinks I like someone who I actually hate. "Oh my god Harper you dare say that! If you weren't so stupid you would actually have understood that I actually hate him! He's so innocent and childish, seriously, I can't stand him!" That seemed to make the trick.

Harper got up from her bed and hugged me silently. Aww, I thought, this is like a scene from a movie. Gross. "I'm so sorry Cleo, that was really unfair of you..."she murmured. If I were a good friend, I'd apologise for calling her 'stupid'. I clearly wasn't though. Now I feel like a total bitch that I'm going behind my 'friend's' back. She still really deserves it though."

She did. She does. Nothing can cleanse her from what she did that day.
I always knew secretly that she did know, but never ever showed it. After that day, she switched her character, from a cheeky bitch to an innocent sweet girl.

And I don't blame her.

I would have done the same.