Neverland.

12; Last Love

Sky's POV

I stayed with Janelle during my last week.

I used my last week in New York wisely. I made my last stops at a few places. I went to Grand Central Station where me and my brother use to ride the subway to our favourite restaurants. I remember when I used to eat. It was fun. I went to Central Park, where me and my family used to have annual picnics. I went to a little shop on Wall street that my mom took me on my 14th birthday. She bought me my first pair of high heels there. I remember when I couldn't walk in them. Now I can practically run. I said goodbye to Em's parents. I went to Neverland and smoked my last joint in New York. I realised I would probably never come back here.

I felt quiet nostalgic after all my trips. I missed my old life.

During the week, I anonymously cyber-blasted the school with the video of Rachel and Peter. Peter was let off with a warning after his fatherb paid the school a huge amount of money, but Rachel was suspended. I went to a mid week party Zac invited me to. I did extra careful planning so that my timing would be perfect. Just as Zac undress me in his room, and slipped himself inside me, Mel came storming into the room. The hurt in her face, and the rage fit that followed, were two things I would never forget.

I felt powerful and just a tiny bit guilty. I didn't care much, I was leaving soon anyway.

Today was the last day. It was time for my last stop. The graveyard. I bought 4 red roses. I stood infromt of my parents' and brother's graves. I didn't talk out loud. I was too sad. I simply told them that I loved them in my head. Walking away I turned back. "I'm sorry I let you guys down. I never meant to become this person." I started crying. I placed the roses on their graves. I went to Emma's grave. I placed her rose there. I felt so sorry for Em's parents. They lost their kid and their grandchild all at once.

When I left there I was more depressed than usual. I walked to a cafe where I wanted to get some coffee. Suprisingly a few guys from school were there too. I saw them staring as I walked in and sat down behind them. I wasn't in the mood for them. One of the guys was Anthony. I had sex with him at 3 parties. The other guy was a stranger, yet I knew his face. I must've slept with him too. The other boy was really a stranger and I'd never seen him before in my life. I heard their whole conversation.
"Yeah I fucked that chick like 5 times, she's good." "She looks cheap too. Look at what she's wearing."
"She'll have sex with all of us if we ask I bet. "
"Slut."
"Whore."
"Her parents must've been so dissapointed, they killed themselves. Who could honestly love that?"

I left after the last sentence without ordering coffee. I heard enough. I left crying.

It had started raining and I was soaked. Cars zoomed past me, not a single cab stopped. I was atleast 27 blocks away from Janelle's house. I sat down on the nearest bench, letting the rain pour over me. I didn't care anymore. I cried as the rain poured. Nobody would even notice. My make up was running over my face by now and my hair was a mess.

That when a gaurdian angel with white wings flew to my rescue. And by that I mean a asshole in a taxi. Peter. He opened the door and looked at me with a weird expression.

"Just get in the car before more of you appearence gets damaged." Peter said, rudely.

I did as I was told. He took me to his house. He didn't say a single word the whole ride, and neither did I. When we got to his room he shut the door behind us. He looked at me as I stood shivering. He moved closer to me. I could feel his body heat. Without saying a single word Peter wrapped his arms around me. I expected him to yell and scream about almost getting him expelled, and getting his little slut suspended.

He didn't. He just held me. I didn't have the strength to push him away. I was tired of fighting. I just gave in. I let him hold me. I held him back. I breathed his sent in deeply for the last time. I pressed my body against him even closer. I felt like my vunerable old self. The good girl. The loveable one.

I sobbed against him. "Peter, I don't wanna leave you." I let my tears run free. Peter grabbed me tighter.
"I don't want you to leave Tink. I need you." He said. He was crying too. I felt more alive and yet dead at the same time. "You wanna know what I heard today? I heard someone say my parenrs killed themselfs because I was such a dissapointment." I said. I cried harder. Peter shook his head violently.

"You are amazing. You will never be the reason they died. That was an accident. And I bet they're really proud of you, because you're going to live with your dad. I know that must take every ounce of courage you have. And you grew up so beautiful. You don't even need make-up. Atleast when you leave, people won't be mean like that anymore. Its a new start. God knows babygirl, you deserve a new start." Peter said. I nodded. He was right.
"Yeah I do. And you deserve to be happy too. I want you to be happy when I leave. If that means loving Rachel, do that." Peter shook his head.

"No," he said giving me a faint smile."She doesn't make me happy like you do, Sky Dias. Me and Rachel are over." He said. I kissed his lips. It tasted like home. That was the one thing in my life that hadn't changed. His kisses.

"We should let go of each other Peter. Long distance, its gonna hurt." I told him. Again he smiled faintly. "We will, in time. But right now, just let me love you."

And without me even answering him he kissed me. I longed for him. He let his hands run over my body. I missed his touch. He kissed my cuts, that had gone from 12 on my left arm to 67 all over my body. I know. Its so cliché that I count my cuts. It was only when I took off his shirt, that I realised he had cut himself too. His arms had my name carved in them. Multiple times. I kissed them. I wanted to kiss them better. I needed to make him better.

We didn't have sex like you expected though. It wouldn't have meant a thing if we did. Sex was just sex in new york. There was no speacial meaning. Not when you've had it so many times, with so many different people. Not in our circumstances. I fell asleep in his arms. Our bodies were pressed close against each other. I could feel his breathing in my neck. It felt safe.

Peter's POV.

Finally she let me in again. In front of Janelle's house, I kissed her goodbye. That was the last time I would kiss her. My heart was relieved and broken at the same time. "I love you, my one and only beautiful Tinkerbell. In another life, I bet we never grow up and we travel the world, and stay in Neverland forever together. Goodbye love." I said. She looked sad, but also content. Both of us got closure now. We didn't have to pretend anymore. "Goodbye Peterpan. I'm gonna miss you like crazy. I will never forget you. Call me once in a while okay? I love you." Sky said.

"I love you, Sky."

Sky's POV

I went into Janelle's house that night and without a word I went to the bathroom. I stared at myself in the mirror. I didn't know who I was. I wanted to stay here. I did not want to stay with my abusive father. I had gotten all the closure I needed. I destroyed everyone I wanted to. And I received the oppurtunity to love Peter again. I felt less empty. Yet this feeling was not pleasant. I would still never be good enough to please myself. I dissapointed myself and therefore it was over now. I searched for a blade in the little cabinet above the sink. I stared at myself in the mirror. I will never be able to live like this. I will never be able to live without him. And so I cut my arms vertically. I sat down on the floor watching the blood drain from my arms. There was so much blood. I closed my eyes for a second. I had to fight to keep them open actually. But pretty soon my eye lids was to heavy and the blood pooling around me was too much.
I closed my eyes for the last time, and all I saw was Peter's face. His beautiful, beautiful face. I smiled.

Now I would go to Neverland. And stay there forever.