nepenthe // p.jisung

_10_

         
Akina strolled down the hall on Tuesday morning, her earbuds in. She walked alone in the halls, but she preferred it that way.

Akina was the kind of person that anyone could see and not bother, but only certain people would recognize that she's another person like them. Like how Jisung saw her, and Haechan. They noticed Akina.

It was one of Akina's favorite songs that played. Her steps matched the mellow beat, but they came to a stop when trying to enter the room into her art class.

Soomi stood at the door, blocking her way. Two other girls stood at her side. Akina dropped an earbud, an annoyed feeling running through her veins.

Soomi was one of those girls. Every guy would fall to her feet. Only a sophomore, yet she sleeps around with guys from here, and even other schools. It irked Akina, just her presence. Soomi chomped on her gum, blowing a big bubble. She gave Akina a once over before scoffing.

"What?" Akina growled.

"Ooh!" Soomi fake gasped. "Someone bites."

Akina narrowed her eyes. "Can I just get into the classroom?"

Another laugh, and evil one. Soomi flipped her shiny hair across her shoulder, leaning closer to Akina's face. Soomi's perfume radiated off her in obnoxious waves, giving Akina a headache. She wore it heavy, probably to hide the smell of the cigarettes everyone knows she has. Somehow, it made her cool.

How come it's cool to other students for you to hurt yourself in such ways as smoking? It's just as bad as harming yourself in other ways.

"I heard you and Jisung hung out at the festival over the weekend," Soomi said, her voice lathered with a sugar coated glaze as a bad way to cover the bitterness.

"And?"

"You know he's only hanging out with you because he feels bad for you?" Soomi's friends cackled behind her.

Akina bit the inside of her cheek. "Jisung's my friend," she replied with a sharp sound.

"Friend?" Soomi scoffed. "We are talking about the same Jisung, right? Jisung Park? He wouldn't befriend you." Soomi's face straightened and came closer. A threat. "He pities you, that's all."

The words shot at Akina, right in her chest. A burning, stinging feeling sunk in. Akina spun around and marched away from the classroom. A frustrated cry formed at the back of her throat, but she swallowed it down. She always swallowed it.

"Why do you think he's always uncomfortable around you?" Soomi called to Akina, finishing her work.

-     -     -

"She wasn't in art today," Haechan told Jisung. He had his head rested against the wall as he sat on the floor of Jisung's room. "I saw her earlier, so why wasn't she in class?"

Jisung shrugged. "I saw her at school too, but she didn't show in the library last period."

Haechan sighed. "I'm glad you're here to let me talk. I really need a listener at times like these."

Jisung fiddled with his thumbs, looking down at them. "I'm good at listening. You can tell me anything."

"I just want to be able to explain what Akina is like, but I have no words to describe how her eyes shine and how her smile makes my world feel whole. I want to write words as beautiful as her, but I can't because words don't exist that can describe her."

"Ethereal," Jisung whispered. "Something extremely delicate, and almost too perfect for this world."

Haechan looked up at the boy with a blank look. It soon softened to a smile. "Maybe there is a word." Haechan looked down to his phone at the sound of a vibration. His whole aurora seemed to lighten.

Jisung watched him pick up the phone and begin typing away. "Akina?" Jisung asked.

Haechan nodded. "We're thinking about seeing a movie together sometime. I offered today, but she said she isn't feeling too great."

Jisung felt something like a needle push into his chest. Worry spread throughout him. Jisung was scared she was feeling sad.

"We're going Saturday," Haechan clarified. His eyes were shinning like a little kid's on Christmas. "Wish me luck, Ji. I'm planning on confessing."

Jisung felt his eyes widen. "Already?"

Haechan's smile dissolved. "I mean, it's better now than never."

-     -     -

Jisung sat alone on the steps to his house with a basketball. He tossed it back and forth between hands, waiting for Akina to show up. Jisung jumped to his feet when she finally started passed his driveway.

"Akina!" he called.

She didn't even acknowledge Jisung. Akina's head hung low and she scuffed her feet on the road.

Maybe she can't hear me because of her music, Jisung thought. As he walked down the driveway, ditching the basketball, he called to her again. "Akina!"

This time, she glanced in his direction. Akina seemed to quicken her pace, turning her head away.

"Wait." Jisung started to jog up to her. "Why are you leaving so quickly?"

Akina continued to speed walk.

"Why are you ignoring me?" Jisung desperately asked. He grabbed her sleeve, trying to get her to turn to him. Akina halted, along with Jisung. Her head bent down, trying to keep her eyes away from his.

Jisung pulled out one of her earbuds. When her head whipped up to face Jisung, he had a mini heart attack, expecting to see irritation, or even rage, written in her expression. However, all Jisung saw was hurt. All he saw was pain in her deep brown eyes, and a girl drowning in it.

Jisung shifted his gaze around her face, as if he could find an answer to her expression someone written in it.

"What's wrong?" Jisung asked. He lightened his grip on her sleeve, but didn't let go.

"Do you pity me, Jisung?" She spoke with a rough tone, and it caused Jisung to worry.

"What?"

"Why do you even bother being a friend to me?" Akina narrowed her eyes, staring intently into Jisung's. "Do you only talk to me because you feel bad for me?"

Jisung immediately shook his head. "What are you going on about? I talk to you because you're my friend." Jisung let his expression soften. He dropped her sleeve. "Why would you think otherwise?"

"Soomi," Akina just barely whispered.

To Jisung, Soomi was an attractive girl. She was his first ever crush, but that was a long time ago. Now, he sees her differently. Jisung gets uncomfortable around her because of the kind of life she lives. She's only fifteen.

"I don't care what Soomi said," Jisung told Akina. Her eyes lowered to her feet. "If you're going to listen to anyone about the way I feel about you, listen to me."

Guilt ran on Akina's face as she looked back up. "How do you feel about me?"

Words caught in Jisung's throat. He's never been great at expressing thoughts since he never grew up sharing them. "You're a great friend," he finally said. "I... I really hope we can be like this for a while. I don't want you to disappear." Jisung smiled. "Don't fade away from my life like a firework fading from the sky."

Akina sniffed, eyes clouding. A smile mirrored back. "I promise, JiJi. I promise."