Letters To Shay||✓

chapter four.

I always dreaded Monday mornings. Today was no exception, much thanks to my loving mother and darling father; note the sarcasm. He kept on dropping judgemental remarks about everything I did. Yesterday, we had a full-blown argument that resulted in a lot of door-slamming and yelling. Since he had a lot of things to complain about, I gave him a few more reasons to shout- shrinking all his shirts two sizes small, dying his suits a blue-green colour, replacing his black coffee with dirt, 'accidentally' placing his shoes in the recycling bin. Oh that one was hilarious, watching him chase the truck. Not to mention sending all his important calls to voicemail and giving him a 'WORLD WORST DAD' mug. In my defence it was a pretty nice mug! See? A few. This morning we yelled at each other again as I walked to the bus. What for? I wore all black to spite him. In your face, sucker!!

The drive to school was very quiet...too quiet for comfort. Two KODs were sitting behind me, giving me cold looks. I pulled my hoodie tighter and plugged my earphones in my phone, drowning in the lyrics of the song. I didn't realise we'd even arrived at school until everybody had left the bus and I was the only one left. The driver tapped me on the shoulder, telling me to leave the bus. I gave him a cold look and walked out of the bus.

Ah, Hawks College! Home of the smartest, bravest and athletic. Home of the wild and weird. Home of the stereotypes, clichés and secrets. In these sturdy walls, you either stuck to your status quo and survived, or stand out and get a free visit from the Queen Bitch, that is, Stephanie, just like I did. I chose to be different by not joining the nerds, hippies, cheerleaders, drama freaks, music weirdoes, bad boy gang and most importantly, the wannabes who cleaned up after the populars' mess. I went with the Gothic look- black clothing from head to toe and let my stubborn unruly hair stay in a bun. I was approached by the Queen herself two weeks after I enrolled into the school. Admitted, she looked cool and her group was really dope, but something seemed off. Finally she told me about KOD and I thought, 'Heck, why not?', so I went all in. It wasn't until after I joined I discovered the dirty, horrible work they were all involved in.

Instead of Charlotte, I found Duke waiting for me at the school's entrance leaning against the wall with his hands folded across his chest.

If I had a heart, I would yank off my clothes and throw myself at him yelling 'I'm all yours', because damn, Duke was definitely some eye-candy. With gorgeous dirty blonde hair, pale skin, grey eyes that almost looked silver and the face and body of a teen magazine model, he could have any girl he wanted. But I had a rock in place of a heart and he couldn't have me.

He gave me a curt nod which I returned and he bounced off the wall, taking my hand in his. His touch made me uncomfortable, but I covered it up with a small cough and straightened my back.

"Ready?" He asked, his silver-gray eyes locking with my dull earth brown ones. His eyes held an air of uncertainty, fear and hurt. I looked away, refusing to feel guilty. He couldn't like me. He deserves better. I'm too toxic for him, I repeated in my head. Replying with a shaky but loud 'ready', we walked into the school.

Like last week, heads turned and murmurs erupted. The sea of students parted like the Red Sea had for Moses, giving us way to pass. Behind us, the sea of students closed up, all eyes trained on us. All those eyes made goose pimples trail up my arm and I resisted the urge to yell at them. As soon as we got to my locker, Duke turned towards the crowd. "Okay, people. Show's over! You can take your eyes off us now and move on with your fucking lives. Got it?" The crowd scattered as fast as it formed. He turned to me. "I'm so sorry, Keyonna. For making you uncomfortable like this. It kind of comes with the KOD package." He explained, scratching the back of his head but never breaking eye contact. My head begged me to reconsider Duke as my boyfriend but my heart begged to differ, reminding me what happens when I let people in.