Chapter Seventeen

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I stare blankly at the light on the hotel AC unit. The clock on the table next to Tyler reads 4:41AM. Our family is asleep on blowup mattresses scattered around the room.

Tyler is sleeping soundly, my head resting on his bare chest. I can hear every inhale and exhale in his lungs. I can hear every beat of his heart. I can feel the warmth of his skin pressing against mine, enveloping me like the blanket covering us. His arm is wrapped around me in his sleep, his hand pressed to my lower back. My right leg is thrown across his legs. His left arm is resting on his chest, in fingertips only an inch away from my nose. I can smell is cinnamon scent, mixed with his old spice deodorant.

He smells like home to me, but I feel an emptiness in my heart. I can hear my heart thudding in my ears.

It's only been about four or five hours since Delaney made me swear I wouldn't tell on her.

And it's taken me four or five hours to realize Delaney is the fakest friend I've ever had.

In high school, she used to cheat off of me on tests. I'm the whole reason she got into University of California. She used to beg me to write the answers to her exams. She had classes I didn't even take and I would still help her.

Sometimes I did all her assignments because she didn't understand and I felt bad and didn't' want her to fail because her Mom would kill her.

I used to drive her to parties in high school and she knew I didn't drink because of my Mom.

Now I realize that she had me go because I was the designated driver. She's a real estate agent but I know more about her degree than she does.

She used to tell me I had to pay for dinner when we went out because she couldn't afford it, and then she would spend the night at the bar while I was at home studying for a test for the both of us.

She walked all over me and I never saw it. Hell, she moved across the country without saying goodbye to me, and then she avoided me for two weeks because I thought she was reckless moving in with a guy she has seen in person one time.

She went off of Tyler for no reason and then claimed it was because she was worried about me. She cheated on her boyfriend and now she's trying to put me between her and Tyler.

She's trying to make me pick Tyler over her.

And as I lay here with his beautiful man, my heart hurts.

I'll pick him. I'll always pick him.

I glance at the clock again.

4:43AM

I can't be guilty for a moment longer.

Is it selfish of me to wake him up?

Probably, but he would be upset if he found out I didn't sleep because I wanted to talk to him.

I lift my head slowly to peer at him.

A small smile makes my lips tilt upwards.

His brown hair is messy, falling onto on his forehead so low that it almost touches his bushy dark eyebrows. His eyes are closed, his thick eyelashes resting on his cheek. His lips are slightly parted, and you can tell he is recently shaved.

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