amity // phan

nineteen.

-dan-

Technically speaking, it was only a three-day suspension.

Phil was supposed to get back by Tuesday.

That morning, I stood by the front doors, craning my neck, waiting to catch a glimpse of him.

I stood there, watching, until a teacher saw me and told me to go to class because it was halfway through first period, didn't I have somewhere better to be?

Black started to seep into my vision.

Because he never actually came back.

Later that day, Amelia laughed and told me I was silly– told me that Phil disappeared all the time, so I shouldn't worry. She told me that he'd be back in a few days and then we'd all go get ice cream together.

And I nodded alonge, eand I could imagine him so freaking clearly: walking back in on Friday morning, his hair rumpled and his eyes like glass. He'd laugh and say, "Sorry I was gone. I had to take care of some shit. You look adorable."

And then I would get mad at him and he'd kiss me and I'd forget. And then things would melt back into normal, and we would hold hands and laugh about how silly I had been.

So I smiled at her, and I said thanks, and I walked home feeling okay.

And I fell asleep feeling okay.

And I didn't think about it again, until it was a week and a half later and he was still gone.

And then I realized that I was a fucking idiot.

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