A new dream, A new nightmare.

November 9th - Melvin's Birthday Chapter

*inside writer-chan's room*

RenKuro: oh bugged it's now the 10/11/17... I was meant to post this earlier well .. It's only 15 minutes past midnight Melvin won't notice and it's still the 9/11/17 in the US.

*A blond penguin sat outside Writer-Chan's window tapping at it with a knife.*

Hello Dear Readers,

This chapter wasn't actually written by me, rather Mad4Greenz the owner and creator of everyone's favourite crazy blond penguin that switched genders at will and fucks themselves Melvin/Maddy. Blacklustermaster and I edited and spell checked this chapter so enjoy. Also no cats or Ezio's where hurt in the making of this chapter, well hurt to the point where he can't grow back any bones or organs. A paladin may have been hurt but Mad4Greenz when I asked him about it gave me the finger so... I hand you over to him for his Melvin's birthday chapter. Enjoy, comment and vote! Or Melvin will break into your window with a baseball bat and Ezio cat come Christmas, also please remember this year to lock your doors and windows because Fire Santa will return.

~RenKuro~

(Outside p.o.v)

It was the day of nightmares. The day everyone had feared. The local psycopath's birthday.

There was a silence in the town, windows boaded up, bomb shelters locked shut.


(Kai's p.o.v)

Well, how can I explain my day so far?...no melvin...no maddy.. they both weren't in bed, no destruction...only question on my mind was, were and what was melvin up to?


(Ezio' p.o.v)

I didnt know were to go, hide in my bed? No, melvin wll find me there. hide in the barthroom? With me not knowing were melvin is I have to hide but I dont know were is safe. Damn melvin, why did he have to have a birthday this year?


(Outside p.o.v)

Kai and ezio spend hours looking in all the different favourite spots in the whole of true cross and no sign of the green wiredo, even the local zoo, where Melvin can usually be found, in baby penguin form, 'adopted' by one of the female Penguins.


(Kai's p.o.v)

there was only thing to do....*ring*....*ring*

"hello, loveable Nephew, how are you today?" I sighed deeply. Just the person I least wanted to hear. Mephisto.

"hello, Mephisto. We have a problem" for some reason I thought I could hear a slight laugh from Lilith in the background. They know somthing.

"oh, my poor Nephew tell me what your problem is?"

"well, mephisto, melvin is missing and I can't find maddy anywere either. Also, stop calling me Nephew!"


(Melvin's p.o.v)

Hold a flashlight in a pitch black underground locaton. "wire one...check wire two..check. right, all sorted now to celebrate my birthday". After finishing, I happily skip through a portal. Instantly in a sunny location,  throwing a bag over my shoulder while merrily skipping away without a care in the world.


(Outside p.o.v)

whilst Melvin is off enjoying himself, the others aren't having the most peaceful day. Ezio is running around screaming that he can't find a good enough hiding place. Kai is..sort of running around just trying to make sure the people are safe in their homes and asking have you seen the Melvin, Which a lot of poeple replied with 'hell no, thank god we haven't' . At the manner, something else is afoot.


(Mephisto's p.o.v)

Its intresting. The more I learn about the shadowy kin, the more he surprises me. I mean, I would never have thought Melvin would have wanted to do that for his birthday, but each to their own, I guess.

"Lilith, dear share some of the popcorn would you?"

"Nope" As she spoke, she ate a handful of popcorn.

"Why not, my Sweetie?"

"You're on a diet, my lovable demon king" she states as she takes another handfull on popcorn. She can be so mean at times but at least the in-flight entertainment is fun. I'll get something better than popcorn later, i suppose. After all, I have to help her burn off all those calories.


(Narrators aka Mad4Greenz p.o.v)

Yeah, Lilith is the mean one (insert sarcasm here) . If you haven't guessed, they're both sat in Mephisto's flying chair. Watching one of my favourite shows infact. I call it Ezio and Kai show stress season 2 (If you hadn't guessed, seaon 1 is book one). You see, dear reader, let us not forget that this is Melvin and if no one knows were Melvin (Or Maddy) is, melvin gets smashing.

So you could say Kai is also trying to make sure the property damage dosen't add up to more then what Mephisto pays him, If Mephisto bothers to pay him at all. Really, I created Melvin and even I think Mephisto is pulling a dick move there.

After hours of running, Ezio finally faints, exhausted. "well, maybe melvin won't find me here" Ezio of course had fainted in the middle of True Cross station and was quickly robbed of what little belongings he had. He sure does have some nice My little pony underwear.


(Kai's p.o.v)

Ezio couldn't have been more wrong ... as if on cue, a large metallic coffin smashed into the ground behind him. I already knew who was in there. As the coffin door open crushing Ezio's body the sheer fact he said "mummy" before it hit him was definately worth a laugh later.


(Ezio's p.o.v)

It was huge, metal and hurt...alot. I wanna go back home... I wasn't constantly hurt or harvested for oragans before i came to this world!


(Outside p.o.v)

Mephisto and Lilith could only watch in horror as Melvin came walking out sporting a golf outfit...golf clubs and what looks to be a bottle of beer.

"MELVIN!" Kai shouted casuring Melvin a spin around, his golf clubs knocking out Ezio as the poor half demon had stumbled to his feet.

"Oh, hey Kai, how's it going? Look, i got three under par. do you like my new skin rug?" Melvin picks Ezio up, throwing him into the air before using a golf club like a bat and sending Ezio flying with a shout of "BAT THE KITTY!"

"Melvin, were have you been!?" melvin takes a swig of his beer. Lilith pictures Kai as Mrs Weasley in the second Harry Potter film when she hears that line.

"I've been playing golf, why else would I be dressed like this?" Kai froze, knowing that was a bit of a stupid question "I thought it would be nice if I went away for my birthday considering the amount of stress I put you under, Kai" Kai's face quickly takes a look of 'are you kidding me?' especalliy since Melvin gave everyone a day off and they all panicked, well, all but Mephisto and Lilith who knew where he was. "How's the view from up there?" Melvin shouts up at Lilith and Mephisto.

"Percectly fine, Melvin you're paying for the road" Melvin shrugged at Mephisto's attempt of a threatening look.

"Oh, ok then Mephisto, but i'm not paying for my birthday toy's hospital bills" Kai, Lilith and Mephisto looked confused.

"Melvin, I don't need hospital bills" Ezio replied as he limped back over, his leg slowly but surely healing as he does.

"I dont mean you" Melvin's timing was yet again on point as Arthur crashes into a nearby house and Melvin skips over "hello Mr Paladin, hope you enjoyed Melvin airways. Sorry that the in-flight meal was-" Melvin paused, turned into maddy in a puff of smoke and was looking at the shop sign that was on the build. "ohh bakery, well aren't you lucky?" Maddy giggled as she pulled Arthur from the wreck, he was out cold and covered in blood and pudding.

"Ya could say he's covered in Puddin'. Oh, Hey Puddin'." Maddy waved towards Kai who looked ready to kill the two forms of the same psychotic child of Zorc.

"MELVIN!!!" Kai screamed, Maddy vanishing in a puff of green spoke the second Kai screamed. This causes Arthur to face plant into some nicely placed dog shit.

"What? you didn't get me a birthday cake. so i made my own birthday cake and i need to blow out the candles" Melvin then blows out the fire on the poor paladin's head "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MEEEEEEE" as a mushroom cloud slowly appears in the distance.

"Melvin, what did you do?"

"Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll....i wanted our Vatican friends to let them know it was my birthday, They refused to make it a holiday, and i needed a way home so i had to indiana jones my way back" Kai's face turns white in horror.

"You didn't-" Melvin smiles turning into Maddy suddenly.

"I just mixed a little uranium togther a made a nukey party popper Puddin'...i was a baaaaad girl" Maddy fluttering her eyelids innocently at Kai. Of course, Maddy's sucubus charm had no effect on Kai or the others whatsoever and all of a sudden, Maddy, now baby penguim Melvin, fell through a pink portal (Insert Melvin screams of horror at being near pink.) to land in the tea room. Melvin Penguin screams as the chair he falls in starts to strap him down and he feels drained of almost all his powers. The large oak door opens to Lilith, her arms crossed and right eye twiching in anger.

"Bad penguin. Just because you told us you wanted to go golfing does not give you permission to nuke the vatican or anywhere else for that matter. Now. you can stay in here with the teddies until you've learned your lesson." the door shuts and the teddy bears come to life.
"why. hello there mr flippers/ are you ready for our 5 day tea party?"

"fuck off, fluffsalot".

"You can't say dirty words in here. Every dirty word means more of us wake up to play with you" Melvin penguin screams as loud as possible but his screams never leave the walls of the overly girly, overly childish and overly loving tea room built by Mephisto.