Redemption

48

His words came back to me as I headed to the dungeons, slipping into the classroom and taking my regular seat at the back. "I am afraid those are only rumours, sweetheart."

He hadn't shot down the idea as I had thought he would. He merely sighed wistfully and repeated what he had been telling me for months now. "It would be improper."

He hadn't denied that he loved me when his daughter asked. He hadn't said he did, either. He just didn't want to upset his ailing little girl is all.

I couldn't get my hopes up again. Gods, I was a fool. There was still the issue of the pregnancy. How would I tell him? How could I tell him?

I couldn't hurt him. Not after all he had been through. Seeing him so vulnerable tore my heart apart.

He quietly stepped into the classroom, arranging the papers on his desk. From the back of the room, I could see his hands shaking. "Are you alright?"

He looked up, startled. He hadn't seen me when he came in. He was slipping up. His eyes were ringed with purple bruising, his eyes red and raw. He hadn't been sleeping again.

As soon as he looked up, I knew the reason. He'd been studying, ripping through books, trying concoctions. Anything to heal his daughter.

My breath caught in my throat. He looked so frail. I repeated the question. "Sir... Are you alright?"

He nodded curtly, turning back to his stacks of essays. "Quite."

I made my way to the front of the room, laying a hand on his forearm, ceasing his movements. He flinched slightly beneath my touch. "You need to sleep."

He met my eyes, a snarl marring his features. "What I do and do not need is hardly your concern."

I tightened my grip on his arm, trying to get his attention. "Whether or not my instructor sends himself to the hospital is, however. You need to rest."

He shook his head. "I can't."

I sighed. Lifting his chin with one finger, I had him meet my eyes. "Severus... She will be fine for a few hours. She is in good hands. You need to sleep." He seemed as though he were about to argue. "You can't help her if you're incapacitated."

His eyes slid shut. He nodded slowly, a long sigh escaping him. "You are right, Miss Granger."

I offered him a small smile, taking his hands in mine. They were ice. Panic began to set in as I raised my hand, placing the back of it on his forehead. "Merlin, Severus, you're burning up!" I led him through his office to his chambers, helping him out of his robes and coat, finally unbuttoning his white shirt.

He raised a hand to stop me, but I gave him a cold stare. He understood the message. "Besides, it isn't as though I haven't seen what you're hiding under these layers." He sat on the edge of the bed, allowing me to continue. "So stubborn..." I sighed, peeling the garment from his sweat slicked body.

I helped him lay back, removing his shoes, heavy wool slacks, finally covering him with the bedspread. Making my way to the loo, I wet a wash cloth and gathered a few potions I knew he kept handy.

I made my way back to him. He was shivering. I cooed, helping him down the potions one at a time. Dabbing the sweat from his forehead, I realised it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. "I'm going to run you a warm bath."

He shook his head, sitting up to grab onto my arm. "I will be quite fine."

I tutted, ensuring he lay down again. "What is your problem with people trying to help you? You need to rest. Just let me take care of you, you miserable old bat."