Amy, Martin & The Elements Of Winter

10. Flashbacks

* a night and a day later*

I was sitting in my bed. I had one more night. One more night to talk. One more night to live like a normal human. Next day was school, that was in my mind. But I had to enjoy my last few hours with emotions.

I jumped up and ran over to the window. "Hello mom!" I called out. "I want to spend my last time with you!" I saw her smile on the clouds. I hoped she was okay up there. I remembered the day when she died.

"Bye Amy, take care of yourself! she called through the open window. I was standing in the street with a heavy schoolbag on my shoulders. I looked up to her and smiled. "I will, see you later!" I called and waved at her. Then I started to run. I would come Late if I wouldn't hurry up a little.....

My eyes felt wet. I was crying. Mom looked down at me from the sky. I looked up to her. "Sorry mom, it's just..." "I know, it's hard for you, Amy! I Can read your thoughts. Don't worry, it will be okay," she spoke. I started crying even more. "Tell me, how am I supposed to find a man and have children when I am emotionless?" I shouted. She looked at me. "I know it's hard-" she started. "-You know, you know! You don't know anything,you are just up there, minding your own business, not giving a shit about how I feel down here! Do you know how I miss you, mom? Dammit!" I yelled at her.

I noticed I shouldn't have said that to her. She just sighed, " This is not how you're supposed to talk to your mother, Amy...." I replied," I'm sorry..... I was just really mad!" She smiled,"It's okay, let's rather think about the nice things we've done together!"

December, 27th, in the year when I was 8
We were all sitting together in the living room. Samuel was 12 back then. We were watching a film together. It was about romance. Samuel was giggling all the time. I was 'awing' and my parents were kissing all the time. Samuel looked at them and then He looked at me. His face looked so funny. I started laughing. He started laughing too......

I was smiling with This thought in my head. It was so funny back then. My mom was watching me. She was laughing too. But my laugh soon turned into painful screams. I felt pain in my heart. I felt like someone was stabbing me. It felt cold. And I couldn't even cry although it hurt.