Blue Ocean Floor (A Justin Timberlake Fanfic)

Confidently Lost

"Cassy?"

"Hey."

"It's late..."

"I know...I just...I wanted to hear your voice."

"Is something wrong?"

"No...I was just...in bed...in LA...and it still...it smells like you."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong."

"Cassy, I know you. Something is wrong."

"I just miss you. I want to see you. I...need to see you."

"I'll leave tomorrow."

"Justin, I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to call you so late. I'm so stupid. Don't come. Forget I called you. I'm gonna go to sleep. I'm sorry."

"Cassy, please don't-"

"Don't, Justin. I'm sorry for calling you ok? Goodnight."

"Goodnight. I love you."

"I love you, too. Bye."

I closed my eyes really tight as I felt my chest tighten up. Hearing Justin's voice used to be comforting, and now it was becoming a descent into anxiety. I used to be able to call him at any time of the day and he would talk to me for hours. But now he was married. I was acquaintances with his wife. I rolled over and looked at the clock next to my bed. 3:27am. I rolled my eyes. I reached for some sleeping pills in my drawer and waited for sleep to hit me.

The next morning I woke up and decided to find a yoga class to go to. When we reached the end of the class and we were winding down, all laying on our backs and listening to the teacher speak to us, I felt the tears welling up in my eyes again. When was the class was over I went to grab my bag and pulled my phone out of it. Justin's name was flashing across the screen and I hurriedly opened it.

"Cassy, I'm worried about you after that call last night. I hope everything is ok. I'm sorry I couldn't talk to you longer I just didn't want Jessica to get suspicious. I hate that we have to do this. I love you. Call me when you get a chance."

I grabbed my bag off the floor and realized everyone around me was gone.

"Hi." I realized the teacher of the class was walking towards me.

"Oh, hey. Sorry I guess I got lost in my own world for a minute. I really loved your class. It was very...freeing."

"I don't want to seem weird or anything, but I noticed you crying. It happens from time to time but I still wanted to ask you if you were doing ok."

"Yeah, of course. I'm fine."

"You just...have an energy surrounding you. Like something is really plaguing you."

Did this woman think she was my psychiatrist?

"No, I'm fine."

"Ok. I hope you decide to come back tomorrow."

"I probably will. Thanks."

I walked out the room and to my rental car, a weird feeling lingering after the teacher spoke to me. I found myself driving past a salon and decided to pull over. I don't know what came over me but I knew I wanted to change something. 2 hours later my hair was black for the first time in 7 years, my curls straightened and blowing in the California wind. For the first time in a long time I felt like I was me. I felt like I was home.

I stopped at In n Out on my way home and sipped on my neapolitan milkshake while I listened to Strawberry Bubblegum. When I got home and walked through the front door, I saw Justin sitting on my couch.