Way Back Into Love

chapter six

MARGAUX

"CALM DOWN, Margaux. Everything's gonna be alright." She said but I keep on walking. I can't calm. I just can't.

Pinipigilan ko ang luha na gusto nang kumawala sa mga mata ko. As I stop the car in front of the hotel I just left it there and hurriedly get off.

Kaba at sakit ang nalalantay sa buo kung katawan ngayon. How could he do this to me? He promised that he won't do anything that will hurt me.

"Mar." My ate Celine grab my hand to hold it.

"Ate, why?" I just utter the words with trembling voice.

Hindi ito nagsalita but I saw sympathy in her eyes.

Nang bumukas ang elevator ay agad ko nang tinahak ang kinaruruonan nang taong ina-akala kong sya ang huling mananakit sa akin.

One of my friends sends me a photo of my boyfriend with a woman in this hotel. I don't want to believe her but as I look at that fucking photo my heart hurt.

I stood at the door, hindi ko alam kong pipindutin ko ba ang bell o hindi but before I can decide, Celine already push it for me.

Nag-uunahan ang kaba sa dibdib ko nang may marinig akong ingay sa loob. Isang-isang nahulog ang mga luha na kanina ko pa pinipigilan when I saw my boyfriend wrapping his hand to a woman's waist.

My mind becomes blank. He's so calm while looking at me as if he was expecting this scene.

"Marga---" he utter but my hand stop him from talking. Kulang ang sampal nna ibinigay ko dito gusto kko itong saktan but what for? I can't even feel my body.

All i know, I was walking out if that place. My sister keeps on chasing me.

"Margaux! Let me drive!" Celine

Pero I didn't listen to her I just continue driving. But what happened next made me regret everything.

I saw Celine with a blood on her face and she's didn't move when I called her name.

"C-Celine? N-no. Wake up Please"

"Wake up! Celine please, I'm s-sorry" My cry didn't reach the person next to me. I want to held her to wake her up but my body was numb, my vision become blurry. The day I opened my eyes everything falls. This is my entire fault.

I opened my eyes while the tears keep on flowing in my eyes. Nightmare. A nightmare that keeps on hunting me.

I remember what Andrew when he wakes me with the same nightmare.

"Margaux Guanzon, it's not your fault why Celine end up in that situation, and it was an accident. It's no one's fault" saad nito sa akin.

I broke in his embrace.

"Pero kung hindi dahil sa katangahan ko hindi sana sya nadamay Andi" I said

"Girl you should let go, you already made yourself suffered. If Celine would see you, for sure she wouldn't like how you ruined your life because of what happened. Everyone need to move on and accept everything that happened, including you Mar. For sure your family accepted it already and now they are worried about you."

Are they? "How I wish my father does." I leave my bed and go for a shower.

After several years of running away I was finally able to come home. Ayaw ko man but I need too. My brother called with a bad news.

I fix myself and leave. Buti at hindi pa nabebenta ni Mama ang condo na ito. I used to sleep here with Celine, we have a lots of memories here, maybe that's the reason why my mom still leave it open for me if ever the time I go back.