Don't Hide Your Love Away

8

Btw idrk how alcohol works so if anything seems illogical I apologize
Now after a four day bender I do in fact know
Yeah this involves a little drugs because I don't like anything sober nowadays
Hahaha now i do lenny face and cry because I have no weed

Music filled my ears and I bolted up, triggering a pounding headache.
"Ah god." I groaned holding my head.
Everything from earlier was just a blacked out blur.
Everything fucking hurt. God.
I stood up and felt a stingy pain on my hand.
A bandage hung loosely, slowly unraveling.
It suddenly fell completely off and I almost screamed.
There was a deep cut that went across my whole hand. A very deep cut.
Great.
"Finally!" Julian ran up to me.
"What?"
"You slept for like two hours. A bunch of us have just started playing truth or dare now."
He grabbed me by the wrist and pulled me over to a large circle.
"Hey Dex. You look better." Danita laughed.
Oh no. What have I done?
I sat down next to Daysha who was next to Ally who was next to Danita. Julian sat on the other side of me and it went quiet.
"Ok! Daysha, truth or dare?" Danita began.
"Uh truth."
Danita grinned.
"Who took your virginity?"
Daysha gasped in embarassment.
"Uh... it was... Mathew Berry. We used to date before he became a dick."
Ah shit... glad he doesn't beat her up and stalk her...
"Really?!" Ally gasped.
Daysha nodded.
Daysha cleared her throat.
"Ok. Chase, truth or dare?"
Wait. He's the guy who was flirting with me!
"Dare."
"I dare you to makeout someone..." She grinned, giving him a wink.
He stood up with a smile, and looked around.
"Such a hard choice." He walked over to Daysha, and leaned down, and just before he kissed her shocked face, he switched up and suddenly he was kissing me.
He had grabbed my hair, pulling it back hard. His hand lingered after a moment and he winked at me.
"Oh my god! Awe our Dexy got a kiss." Daysha squealed, while Julian seemed revolted.
"Fucking sick..." He muttered.
I just sat there wide eyed, trying to ignore his homophobia.

Fifteen minutes later....
"Ally, truth or dare?" Some drunk guy named Michael said.
"Truth."
"Ok... too bad you didn't pick dare you sexy thing... I guess... have you had sex with anyone in this room?"
Sexy thing? Kinda blunt there.
She blushed and nodded.
"Who was it?"
Ally blushed harder and glanced at Julian.
"You two had sex?!" My jaw dropped, feeling sadness and jealousy bubbling in my stomach.
Julian glared at me and Ally hid her face.
"Fuck you."
I just pulled my knees up to my chest and rested my head against my knees, not wanting to look at him any longer.
"Daysha, truth or dare?" Ally said, interrupting us.
"Dare..." she answered.
"Kiss your crush." She said.
Daysha looked down at her lap.
"Well, it's not really a crush... more like an attraction..." she said before walking over to a black-haired guy named Brandon Shiro and kissing him.
She skipped back to her seat and sat down.
"Ok! Julian! Truth or dare!" She squealed, grinning mischievously.
"Dare."
Daysha giggled.
"Who do you think is the hottest girl here?"
The girls started squealing and murmuring, while he just grinned as he scanned the room.
"Gotta go with my girls Daysha, Ally, and Danita." He said winking at them.
Daysha laughed, shooting him a smile while Danita gave him a wink.
Ally, she just smiled.
Damn... wish he would think I was attractive.
Julian looked around the room, before looking at Danita.
"Truth or dare?"
She pondered for a minute, before smiling.
"Truth." She grinned.
Julian thought about it for a second and let out a smile.
"Who's the last person you fucked?"
"Hmm... I think it was this guy Asher."
She smiled mischievously and looked me right in the eyes.
"Truth or dare Dexter."
Ugh.
"Truth." I sighed.
"What's your biggest secret?"
My heart stopped and fell down into the pit of my stomach.
My face warmed.
She giggled as did all the females that were staring at me- Daysha and Ally included.
"We know, why won't you say?" She squealed.
"Yeah!" Cookie yelled.
"What do you... mean you know." I muttered, feeling the bile filling up my throat.
Julian nudged me and I turned to look at his smiling face.
"Who is it? Obviously, we know."
Annnd they think it's that I like Ally.
"Yeah ok. You don't know." I said cocking my head.
Stupid answer.
"I knew you had something! Tell!" He whined, inching closer to me.
I couldn't help but get lost in his eyes.
"N-no way! I don't know what you mean you know, I'm not anything! Nothing happens to me." My voice cracked, and now everyone was staring.
He looked confused.
"Why are you so nervous bro?"
He has really nice lips.
I ended up licking my own lips, snapping out if my daze when he grabbed my shoulder.
"Dexter?"
"I'm don-done?" I more so asked than stated, before getting up and heading to the bathroom.
I closed the door and put the toilet lid down, and sat on it.
God fucking dammit!
*GRAPHIC SELF HARM WARNING*
I grabbed a blade from my pocket and sighed quietly to myself.
I ripped my sleeves up and ripped off the ace bandages and dug the blade into my skin.
I sighed softly as the metal ripped open my skin, leaving behind a trail of dark red that soon dripped down and splashed onto the floor.
I let out another twitch and I slit my inner forearm open.
Blood started gushing out and my heart began pounding against my chest.
I started crying and gripped my hair tightly.
"Dex?!" Julian suddenly began knocking.
"Y-yeah?" I asked.
"Are you ok?"
...
"Yeah... I just wanna be alone for a bit so I came in here. I'll be out later."
Silence.
"I need to talk to you... NOW. Open the door."
I looked down and groaned.
"Just a minute!"
I wiped up all the blood from the floor and threw the bloodied toilet paper and old ace bandages into the trash.
I turned on the water and washed off my arms.
I dried them quickly and searched through the medicine cabinet for some bandages.
"Dex I know you aren't taking a shit. What the fuck are you doing?" Julian yelled through the door.
I quickly bandaged my arms, put the first aid kit away and pulled my sleeves down, shoving my blade into my pocket, and then I opened the door.
"Sorry. What do you need?" I huffed, completely out of breath.
He smirked.
"There is pizza! It's huge!" He grabbed my newly cut arm and I couldn't help but cry out.
That caused him to stop short and turn around.
"You ok?"
I nodded, tears welling up in my eyes.
"You can't always lie to me bro." He groaned as we walked to the food court.
We met up with Ally and Daysha who had two plates each, each holding a slice of pizza.
"I'm not hungry." I said, pushing away the plate Ally was offering.
I walked off, I didn't want to be around Julian.
---
Ally POV
Daysha sighed, sitting down at the bar with me and pulling her hair back behind her shoulder.
"Dexter is being weird..." She sighed dramatically, resting her chin on her palm.
I nodded, scanning the room for him.
"He's been especially weird about Julian." She added softly, like she wanted to say more.
"Yeah... I wonder why? Did they have like a fight or something?" I questioned.
Daysha just shrugged.
"Possibly. Julian has been kind of... rude. And Dexter has been sketchy."
"Hey girls!" Danita walked up to us with a grin, Brandon was beside her.
"Hey Daysha." He said with a small smile.
She returned it, and twirled some of her hair.
"Hey Brandon."
Danita nudged him, causing him to go red in the face.
"I am attracted to you too."
Daysha squealed, jumping up and hugging him.
"Great! I am so glad"
I smiled at the both of them, happy Daysha was so happy.
"Also I Stan a gay Dexter, you can't tell me he didn't want to kiss Jules back there." She giggled, running off.
I raised a brow, utterly confused.
Maybe she's just... drunk.
---
Dexter POV
"WE GOT MORE ALCOHOL AND ACID!" Haha
Some guy yelled bursting through the front door.
Ally, Daysha, and Julian were currently on the couch talking when that happened... I was just staring at the wall feeling sorry for myself because Julian loves Ally and not me.
I started walking over to the couch to greet them.
They looked up at me, expressions unreadable.
Chase walked up before I could speak, with two gallon water jugs full of some alcoholic concoction and thrusted one into my arms.
"That is the Chase specialty. You'll love it." He said smiling.
I went to take the cover off when Julian grabbed me.
"What the hell are you doing?" He asked.
I raised a brow.
"Drinking this. Why?"
"Please don't. You get weird when you are drunk." Ally whispered.
I just frowned and pulled away from Julian.
"So what?! I can drink if I want! And-and I don't care what I do." I yelled, suddenly becoming defensive.
Chase slung an arm around my shoulder, grinning like a maniac.
"Come on guys. It's a party." He said.
"Seriously dude? You could die." Julian hissed.
"Good. I've been trying to." I blurted out.
"What?" His eyes went big in shock, and I instantly regretted my words.
"N-nothing!" I yelled.
"What's that mean?!" Ally yelled pushing past Julian.
Chase stepped in between us and smiled.
"You can't die from this... but if you don't want to it's fine... I mean... if you don't wanna see who can chug theirs faster, it's ok Dexybear. No one has beaten me yet annnnd I was kinda hopi-"
"Ok." I said opening my jug, earning a smile.
He hopped up onto the coffee table and pulled me up with him, he kept hold of my hand though.
He has nice looking hands... I blushed, realizing people could see me and looked up at him.
"LISTEN UP LADIES AND GENTLEMENNN! YOU ARE ABOUT TO WITNESS THE MOST AWESOME CHUGGING CONTEST EVERRRR!" He screamed, catching everyone's attention, and the music was shut off immediately.
They all gathered around, everyone looking excited except my friends.
I can win this...
"Ready... set... GO!!!" Danita yelled, allowing the contest to commence.
I immediately lifted the jug to my lips and chugged as fast as I could.
After about twenty seconds I was halfway done.... I sped up and finished the rest in thirteen seconds.
I looked at Chase who was only about two fifths way through his.
"AWESOME!" He yelled as the crowd cheered.
I smiled slightly before crashing down to the floor.
Before anyone could help me, I pulled myself to my feet.
"Ah fuck." I muttered, swaying again and falling again- onto Julian.
Right into his fucking arms...
I can't even think... god I'm so fucking gay. I am so in love god why did this happen to me I am a faggot isn't Julian homophobic I don't know what to do he kissed my neck I want to kiss him why CANT I JUST FUCKING KISS HIM AND TELL HIM HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM?!!!
"-DEXTER!"