caught in a landslide, pt. 2

Stay Strong

Author's note: **Trigger Warning** This chapter contains a graphic scene. Please be advised.

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*Flashback*

"Harry," I whispered trying to not wake Evie. "Harry..."

"Yes, love?" His voice sleepy as he rubbed his eyes.

"I'm bleeding," I told him quietly.

He slowly climbed out of bed and walked with me to the bathroom. He looked down at the toilet and noticed the toilet paper in the garbage.

"He's gone," I cried. "I just know we've lost him."

Harry reached over and pulled me close. We cried together before returning to bed. He called Manuela who was already on her way. The rest of the time at home was a blur.

The doctor at the hospital couldn't find the heartbeat. The ultrasound was empty - my heart would've looked the same that day.

"I'm so sorry," the doctor told us. "Sometimes these things happen, but luckily, you are both healthy and trying again soon is a possibility."

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That day, my whole world changed. I appreciated life and my children more. I appreciated Harry for being with me. I appreciated my family and close friends doing and saying just what I needed. But I felt horrible. We had been only one week away from announcing that Baby Styles #2 would arrive in August.

This rainbow baby in my belly was a whole new chapter for us. After losing our son, I wasn't ready to try again for a couple months. It wasn't as easy to conceive after that - probably due to stress. Fortunately, we were blessed with a surprise positive pregnancy test in June.

After numerous blood tests and ultrasounds, we found out our new baby girl would arrive in February. Her birthday would be close to Harry's and Evelyn would be just over two years old. Unfortunately, I started to get stressed as the pregnancy went on and it wasn't good for either of us - so my midwife put me on bedrest at 36 weeks.

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"Everything is going to be great," Harry reassured me on February 2nd. "Stay strong - our little girl is going to be a warrior like her mother."

I kissed his lips and danced with him in our living room. Madeline Anne Styles would be joining our family soon and make our bond even stronger.

"Daddy loves you, Madeline," Harry cooed at my tummy.  "And your mommy."

I hugged him even tighter and thanked the universe for our journey.