Me and Zanman7 got to go to a semi-Formal dance at his school! This is what happened yesterday night:
Zanman7 arrived at my house, and photography Mom (Aka: my Mom) immediately got our pictures!
We arrived, and we went to find JustJinger. We ended up finding her at the school photo booth! Me, Zanman7, and a couple other friends went into the photo booth, and got a picture together! Then, the photography guy (who is SO KOOKY! I LOVED IT!), told everyone but us to leave! Me and Zanman7 got a picture together!
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A friend of Zanman7 kept placing pine cones onto the table we were sitting at, so I put them to good use! I even got one of Zanman7's teacher's attention by doing this, and she took a picture! Haha! We danced like there was no tomorrow! Well...everyone but Zanman7. Me and JustJinger kept trying to get him to dance the entire time! It was funny!
And then...the time came...
ME AND Zanman7 SLOW DANCED TO 2 SLOW SONGS BACK-TO-BACK!!! I forget what the first one was, but the second one was this song:
I have always loved this song to bits, and now I love it even more! It was SO ROMANTIC! Even when I get old and get diagnosed with amnesia, I will never forget it.
Hey JustJinger!Zanman7 may not be the most comfortable dubstep dancer, but he is an AMAZING slow dancer!
To end the day off, we got dropped off at Sr. Youth, and we played MarioKart8 for half an hour with our youth Pastor! BEST! NIGHT! EVER!
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So, that was my night. But now I need to touch on something personal, in order to continue:
Over the past many months, I've felt really lonely and out of step with everyone. It's tough, because I either have the choice to be a lonely person in the library during lunch, or I can hang out with my friend Emma, and 6-7 of her friends in the noisy cafeteria. The second choice may sound nice to you, but to me and my mental differences, it's hell. I have relied on my headphones and my schoolwork to keep me sane, and not breakdown in the 401 (school halls) from being a lonely lady.
All of this has made me more clingy to my only friend there, and it's made me vulnerable to the thought of losing and making friends. It's got to the point, where Mom will mention how much it hurts her, hearing that I'm lonely at my school, I'll start full-blown balling.
Last night, when I was hanging out with Zanman7,JustJinger, and their friend group, I felt more happy and accepted than I have in what feels like forever!
This afternoon, I was eating lunch when I was explaining everything that happened last night! I told my Mom that I felt like I fit in with the group of people I was with, and Mom lost it. She explained to me that she hasn't seen me this happy, since my old, colourful-haired friend was around. Ever since the "incident", she has watched me cry over my loneliness, persevere through every piece of shit I've gone through, and focus on my hobby's rather than making new friends. Then, mom surprised me. She and Dad considered whether I should move schools or not. We don't know about the academics yet, but High School's supposed to be about making life-long friends and trying your best at school!
We're gonna keep praying about it, but I needed to get that loneliness thing off my chest, now that something might be done about it.
I hope God shows me where I should go, and I'll try to update more.
Boi!
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