Tainted Secrets (Zarcus/Zalfie)

Far Too Late

Although Joe is my younger brother, he has always been looking out for me from a young age and I couldn't be anything but grateful for that. Of course we had our arguments along the way but when it came down to it, he was there for me.

After finding me slumped pathetically on the side of the road, he had driven me back to my old family home and made a bed on the sofa for me because my old room was now being used as storage. I was slightly upset about that fact however I guess it didn't matter, perhaps it was a symbol of moving on which something I desperately needed to do.

"Where's dad?" I asked, entering the living room in a pair of old fuzzy pyjamas that had been mine when I was a teenager, somehow they still fit me probably due the fact that I hadn't grown since I was about fifteen.

"Gone out to the pub I think..." Joe shrugged, lowering himself down onto the sofa.

I began to clamber into the make-shift bed on the sofa and found it to be surprisingly comfortable. I pulled the duvet right up under my neck and sighed heavily.  My voice was slightly raspy where I had tried to push back all of the tears and failed miserably. I felt so drained.

"I've probably got a lot of explaining to do..." Joe muttered, leaning back and scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. He certainly did.

I nodded silently, trying not to push him into anything. After he had been so casual and non-judgemental towards my situation, I had already forgiven him for not telling me about the baby so I didn't want to force him into divulging all of his deepest secrets to me.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." He began,

"That's okay..."

Joe frowned and shook his head,

"No it's not...  I should have told you about everything straight away because you're my sister and I trust you... I was just scared."

I remained quiet for a moment, not really knowing how to respond. He was scared to tell me? What did he think I could possibly do? I felt slightly hurt that Joe felt as though he couldn't tell me things but I guess considering the way I had been acting recently, he had every right to hide it from me.

"I'm still scared..." He whispered softly, moving his body so he was on the edge of the sofa. His eyes met mine and I watched the fear flicker in them. I could now see that the fear was not at the idea of telling me but at becoming a father all together. It must be a terribly scary situation to be in.

With this in mind, I quickly flung the duvet off my body and walked over to him, pulling him into a loving hug. Now it was my turn to look after him.

"Joe... I know you're going to be an amazing dad... there's nothing to be afraid of, I promise" I said rubbing his back gently. I knew he was still unsure and honestly I didn't blame him. He was only twenty one, which was quite young to be becoming a father but I also knew he would rise to the challenge.

"Thanks." He replied weakly, pursing his lips.