Tainted Secrets (Zarcus/Zalfie)

A Little Rain

I was so glad to have Louise as my friend again, although I knew it would probably take some time for us to actually be best friends again. Nevertheless I was happy, everything seem to working in out for me.

Despite Marcus not wanting anything to do with me anymore, I knew that it was time to move on and not think about what could have been. After all it was entirely my fault. So now I had to focus on getting my life was getting fully back on track.

I had officially moved back home with my dad and Joe which I think was happy about. However there was also the small dilemma about the fact that Joe had decided Louise would move in with us once the baby had arrived because they couldn't afford to buy their house together.

I can't say that I was particularly excited about that idea as the thought of being woken up at three in the morning by ear piercing crying made me want to scream.

  

In spite of all of that, Alfie and I were getting on great. Our relationship was really starting to blossom. It felt slightly weird at first due to having the freedom to do whatever we wanted without having to hide away or feel guilty about it but it was also an amazing feeling.

I was actually beginning to enjoy my life again. I had felt so trapped and lonely over the past few months and now I was finally free.

"It's snowing!" Alfie cried from the darkness outside, causing me, Joe and a heavily pregnant Louise rushed into my garden quickly. We had been having a cosy evening in watching films together at my house. It felt just like old times again apart from the absent of one particular person.

The cold, wintry wind made me gasp as I ran outside and tugged my coat tighter around my body. I had to squint in order to see Alfie through the darkness but his smiling face soon found mine. I then watched in awe as the tiny specks of white floated down from the sky and landed on my coat in the most elegant way.

"Ohh I love snow!" Louise squealed trying to catch some of the flakes in her bare hands. The four of us danced around like children for a while, trying to catch the snow and watch as it slowly melted.

"Imagine if it was a white Christmas!" Joe said in excitement, grabbing hold of Louise and twirling her round carefully. Her mobility was slightly hindered because of her large belly that bulged out massively.

I found it incredibly sweet how much Joe was stepping up to the role of becoming a doting boyfriend and father, he didn't really feel like the little brother that I remembered, but I guess like many things, it had to be left in the past.

People change, feelings change, everything changes... I should know that more than anyone, although slowly, I was finally learning how to let go and move on with my life.

"Imagine if this baby is born of Christmas day!" Louise mocked, moving her hands over her stomach tenderly and raising en eyebrow at Joe.

"Well then that would be the best present of all..." He beamed, twirling her around again playfully. I wanted to throw up at how soppy and lovey-dovey they were being but I knew that Alfie and I were probably just the same. We just didn't realise it so I simply smiled at them both, ignoring the coldness that was overtaking my body.

Suddenly without warning Alfie grabbed my hand and pulled me in close to his own body, grasping my waist softly. It was almost as though he had been reading my thoughts because the warmth immediately washed over me, causing me to snuggle closer into him.

He then grinned broadly down at me, showing his pearly white teeth. I loved his smile.

"I'm dreaming of a white christmassss" he sung in a whispered tone while he began to dance like a dork. I had no choice but to mimic his movements because of the close proximity of our bodies, but I didn't mind, I merely gawked up at him and giggled. He was incredibly sweet to me.

I rested my head gently on his chest as I listened to his slightly out of tune singing of Christmas songs and thought about how truly lucky I was. At this point in my life I could honestly say I had never been happier. I had a wonderful boyfriend, a loving brother, an extremely forgiving and caring best friend and a tiny, little niece or nephew on the way. What more could I possibly ask for?

I also thought about Marcus though because I really couldn't help it. I wished he had still wanted to be friends with me as I missed his hyperactivity and care free attitude towards life. I knew if he was here he would be the one to throw the first snowball or make the first snow angel because he didn't care about what anyone would think. His only objective was to have fun and I missed that a lot. However I knew I must move on with my life though because that chapter of it was over.

"I love you" Alfie breathed in my ear as he ceased singing. I had been so caught up in my intricate thoughts that I hadn't realised that Joe and Louise had disappeared back inside the house, leaving Alfie and I practically dancing in the snow along to his bad singing.

"I love you too" I grinned gazing up at him, the words falling naturally from my mouth. Alfie then moved his hands from my hips and to my face, placing his lips against mine tenderly. They were cold and chapped from the snowy conditions but I didn't care.

The moment was simply magical. I reacted instantly by kissing him back softly and clutching his jumper in my small fists. I almost felt as though I was a romantic movie or something due to snow falling heavily around the two of us. I was lost in the moment and my heart swelled with happiness.

 We broke apart reluctantly as the gentle snowflakes began to transform into huge raindrops that splashed down our cheeks. Sometimes, I really hated English weather.

"Well that was nice while it lasted" I joked, moving my head down slightly so that the rain didn't go into my face. For some reason, I didn't feel like heading inside even though it was starting to really pour down and I don't think Alfie did either. We both remained transfixed in that spot and stared longingly into each other's eyes.  

"It's definitely not over yet, Little One" He chuckled, leaning in so that he lips gently met mine once more. I didn't want to correct him in the fact that I had been talking about the snow and not our kiss because I was too content with what he was doing.

  

I had never felt so utterly at peace with the world. It was as though nothing could ever go wrong and I genuinely believed that. I realised that my life hadn't gone the way I had always imagined it to but I had learnt something along the way which was much more important.

I had learnt that there's no way of knowing how your life is going to turn out because you never know who you're going to meet or how you're going to feel but things will always turn out right in the end even if it involves a little heartache. I had also learnt that everyone wants happiness and no one wants pain, but you can't make a rainbow without a little rain.

A/N: This is not the end! There will be an epilogue and then that will be it.