The Spy

14

I felt like absolute shit. I've had barely any sleep because the mission kept playing on my mind. I know Mark is on to me as well so it makes my plan even more important to work out.  I've also been avoiding him since the arena and making sure he doesn't see me. But it's making my chest feel heavy and the lack of sleep is getting to me. 

I was up early today because it was better than laying in bed feeling miserable until Mark left. I was picking at my breakfast when I heard shuffling behind me and snapped out of my depressed thoughts.. What has Mark done to me...

He was wearing this weird outfit that probably gave him little protection but more movement. I watched as he put some leftover food in the microwave and faced me. He hesitated before opening his mouth.

"Hi," he said awkwardly. 

"Hi," I replied, mimicking his awkward tone to hide my sad one. Something inside me was screaming to talk to him but the microwave went off and he was no longer looking at me. He sat at the opposite side of the table and started eating quietly.

The silence started getting to me. My thoughts came back but I desperately pushed them away, trying to find something else to think about. Mark's outfit came back into mind and I decided to focus on that instead. 

“Team training today?” I asked when thinking didn't work.  I already knew we had team training but I needed something to break the silence. I looked up from my food, not really wanting any anyway. 

“Yea, we have your suit ready for you at the tournament arena. We’re just doing a practice run today so you know what to do during the actual thing,” he explained. I looked down again, feeling that weird tight feeling in my chest again.

“Oh Ok," I simply said,  trying to eat my food even though I didn't want to.

We finished our food and he washed the dishes before grabbing my arm to teleport me to the tournament arena. I felt the strange tingles where he touched and forced myself to not think about it. I was given a suit similar to Mark's and everyone else's and left to get changed. As I was doing so I overheard people talking. Being me I listened to what they were saying.

“You sure he’s not the one who did it?” I heard Tyler ask someone.

“Yes. I am sure,” Mark responded. I knew they had found out about the mainframe from how tense people have been around me so I stepped out before they could continue. 

“You ready?” Wade asked me with a friendly smile. At least he's being nice. I gave a nod, not trusting my voice, and got into my position.

~time skip~

We decided to take a break and almost right after I saw Cassidy run down to us. I decided it was best to occupy myself with other things instead of making my presence obvious to her. However, Mark noticed me and decided to come talk to me.

"Hi," he said, sounding awkward still.

"Hi," I responded, avoiding making eye contact cause if I did I was afraid I'd say something stupid.

"What happened?" He asked vaguely. It didn't matter though because I know he was referring to the mainframe. I glanced behind us at the others, seeing Cassidy glance over at me with a stern look.

"Can we talk somewhere else?" I asked and was thankful when Mark nodded. He teleported us to the roof of something before giving me a strong look.

"So are you going to tell me what's going on now?" He said, clearly trying to not sound annoyed but not quite hiding his frustration.

"Tell you what?" I asked, instictivly hiding away and blocking everything out.

“I know it was you… The person who hacked into the mainframe… Why did you do it?” He pushed accusingly. I mean, he isn't wrong. It was me but the way he said it sent a pain through my chest similar to being stabbed. The feeling led me to being silent as he let out a sigh and pulled me into a hug.

“Whatever it is… I’m willing to forgive you as long as there are no more secrets,” he said, making me want to tell him everything but my senses came back and I shoved him off me and backed away only to stumble and fall to the ground on my knees.

My thoughts came back; creating a war in my head fighting over to tell him everything or not. I grabbed my head, feeling it ache as I shook it slightly.

“No.. No. No. No… I. Just. Can’t. Stop making this so difficult," I managed to sputter out in distress. I felt hands on my shoulder again but was too focused on keeping my mouth shut and trying to calm down to bother pushing them away. I heard a sigh before Mark spoke in a soft whisper.

“I want to trust you. I really do. But you have to honest with me. Stop avoiding every problem you run into, and for once trust that it’ll be alright after you face them.”

“If only it could to be that simple,” I responded, listening to his words and ignoring them for my groups sake. I wanted to tell Mark but I couldn't. I had a mission and I had honour. I won't betray my friends over stupid feelings.

“You’re right… Things are complicated. But if there is one thing that’s simple enough,” he said before grabbing my face and pulling me into a kiss. I felt those stupid sparks again and wanted to lean into the kiss more but he pulled away. I felt a longing for his lips against mine but consistently reminded myself of my mission.

“I like you Jack. A lot. And I just want you to know I care for you and your well being,” he said, his voice full of concern and care. I gave him a sad smile, trying to show him I can't but gave up myself and let my feelings take over for the first time in ages.

"Fuck It," I mumbled, standing up with him following my lead before leaning in and kissing him deeply. It felt as good as the first time we kissed and I couldn't help but smile as we parted. I watched as he smiled before teleporting us back to the arena with the others. Two targets... My choice on who dies.