Touch; Ticci Toby X Reader

C. 11

When she looks at Toby who looked at her reassuringly, she felt safe, she stops fighting it knowing that Toby would be there to comfort her.

It could be sometime before she is with the world again.

***

'Entry 39

My smile reappears, it is drenched in a garden of red roses that leak crimson.

The red has disappeared like a drop of vinegar in an ocean on of blue.

My legs are crossed as I wait for you on the other side of the window, I will wait till dusk, I will wait for you to return, our pens and minds filled with dust.

Now, wait for me to rest my head, to flutter my eyes, and dream of the beautiful lies we have created.'

Every part of her room interests her. She could sit here and study every part of her room over and over again and never will she get bored.

It changes, the cracks in the wall she hasn't noticed or the temperature of stone against her bare feet.

Everything changes, all the time.

And she knew there was nothing she could do about it, even when the change is unbearable.

The door opens.

***

She is led to an office, two floors up and then to the left.

Joanne was sitting in a chair next to a man at a desk who was looking over papers. She was almost healed now. The man seemed to be aware of her presence, his eyes briefly flashing upwards to get a look at her.

The man had blonde hair, it was combed neatly to one side. His eyes were a curious, strange emerald color. His eyes are so cold.

Without words, Joanne gestures her to sit. She does, her leg folded over the other as she stares at the two waiting for them to talk.

They start off with what happened with Joanne weeks ago, she didn't listen very much. This goes on for a while, maybe 10 minutes and how Joanne chose not to press charges.

"We're going to be going over past... troubles you have had that have caused harm..."The man hums as his eyes scan over a paper, "November 17, 2015: Smashed a doctor's head in the door...October 2, 2015: Fractured patients arm and broke three fingers...June 26, 2016: stabbed nurse with a...fork? And we have Joanne, many kicks in the face, broken nose and other small injuries.."

"Does this sound right?"He asks her, she can't read him. He is so expressionless, like a robot or something. She pretends to think it all over, then nods.

"If anything else like this happens again, and you somehow end up adding another to your report you will be immediately moved to the top floor in a..."He looks at the paper, "padded room permanently, or as long as you are here."Forever, is what he meant.

Her heart stops for a second, "Miss Y/N L/N, I will not sugarcoat anything. You are at a home for the crazy people, "He tells her. "This is where you belong and will stay until you decide you will finally accept our help to change your behavior."

She squeezed her hands into fists on her lap."You're insane, how does this make you feel?"He adds and his emerald eyes are caving in with dark humor. It makes her feel sick. She knew when she was first sent here all of the doctors and nurses were heartless, cold human beings. They didn't care, all they wanted was to be paid for their presence and that was all.

"You are just a hazard in our society. You don't belong."

She feels anger build up in her, her heart pounding in her ears loudly. Was he trying to get her mad? To make her strike at him to get her locked up?

He smiles an evil, crooked smile, "No reaction?"She stares at him with hard eyes, her jaw tense as she bites back her remarks. She doesn't want to risk it. If she was moved to a different room she would never see Toby again. That type of change is the change she is terrified of. Not seeing Toby ever again would crush her, destroy her.

She doesn't reply. He looks at her with mocked disappointment."I'm done, you may leave my office now."

Joanne leads her back, she doesn't even meet Y/N's eyes the whole way back. Not a single word is shared between them; its better off that way.

The door shuts and she hears the lock clicking behind her.

Finally, she is back.

***

She studies Toby, wanting to see through his mouth guard and goggles to get a view of him, his whole being.

What color are your eyes? She asks him finally after getting the courage to. She imagines his eyes as a brown or hazel color that was unique.

I don't remember. He writes back, his eyes are dazed through the orange of his goggles. She wants to see the emotion in his eyes yet all she gets is a wall blocking her view of him. She hates it.

Y/N looks at him surprised. Her heart clenches up and she grasps at it to stop from exposing her pity to him. Nobody enjoys being pitied and she could easily understand that.

She was going to reply, but Toby suddenly pulled his hood down, then his mouth guard exposing his scarred cheek. His goggles come off last and she can't breathe at the sight of him, her eyes widening in wonder.

His rich chocolate hair was tousled in every way. He had strong arched brows and surprisingly long, dark eyelashes. His very pale skin completely made his features stand out. While others would probably say he was average looking, she thought he was very attractive, even with his scarred face. It made him different. Something about him made her drawn to him.

And then his eyes, his eyes were the color of soil kissed by spring rains, dark red crescents under them. His eyes collected and bore tragically every wrongdoing that had been poured upon him, his lips were slightly upturned in a faint smile but those eyes ceased to be a part of this world. They were dull and broken. Dangerous but beautiful.

Y/N absorbed his appearance in her mind never wanting to forget his face, his eyes, his face structure. Nothing was left untouched by her eyes as she marvels over him, not even the small freckle on his chin or the small scar going through his left eyebrow.

Well? Toby asks her, his fingers pressing the lined paper to the window.

A beautiful brown, like honey. She smiles at him, slightly still in a daze like state.

It takes him a moment to react, his lips twitch upwards to a smile. His eyes were genuinely happy as he gazes longingly at her.

Y/N has a handful of cotton balls in her throat, her mind out of control. His smile...

He's beautiful.