Our Happiness

Chapter 9

Naira-- Thank u so much for sitting with me for Dinner,Kartik...bahut achha laga mujhe...

Kartik goes to stand in front of her, only to see her tear stricken face...

Kartik panics, hovering over her--Naira!! kya hua hai tumhe? tum ro kyu rahi ho? Kuch problem ho rhi hai? Kahin pain toh nhi.... maine kaha tha tumse,tum bas rest karo... tum kyu... tum thik....

Naira angrily shouts this time-- Enough Kartik... enoughh now... just stop it... kuch nahi hua hai mujhe... main thik hu... but kya tum thik ho?kya hum thik hain? Kya hamara relationship thik hai?

Kartik slightly angrily-- kya bole ja rhi ho tum Naira? Ho kya gaya hai tumhe?

Then he calms himself down-- dekho naira... i think tum bahut stressed ho... pls batao agar tabiyat thik nhi hai toh... relax a bit... main paani deta...

Naira cuts in-- kuch nhi chahiye mujhe Kartik... plss... kuch nahi chahiye... tum bas jao yahan se... waise bhi u just cant bear to be near me any more... toh jaoo...

Kartik-- wat?? Kya bol rahi ho tum?Naira!! Agar koi problem hai... tum naraaz ho... maine kuch kiya hai... toh clearly bolo... batao mujhe...par ye kya hai... na kuch keh rhi ho and pata nhi kis baat pe upset ho... tabse notice kar raha hu, kuch jawab nhi de rahi ho... problem kya hai? Subah toh thik thi... sab kuch thik tha... achanak aise?

Naira-- tumne notice kiya kartik? Good! chalo kuch toh notice kiya tumne... hamare beech kya ho raha hai,vo na sahi, ye notice kiya... mujhe kuch nhi chahiye... kuch bhi nhi... bas tum chahiye ho... and achanak kuch nhi hua hai kartik... haan thik thi main subah... khud ko thik rakh rahi thi main... samjha rahi thi khudko, ki tum shayad pareshan ho.. stressed ho... busy ho... itne excuses diye khudko tumhare behalf pe... but abhi kya excuse du main khudko?...kya excuse du ki tum mere paas tak nhi aana chahte... ki tum ek raat mere saath iss room mein nhi ruk sakte bina kisi aur kaam ke... ki tum mere saath dinner pe ek formality ki tarah baithe ho tabse... ki hamari date agar gharwalo ne plan ki,toh tumhe sabse pehle yahan se kisi tarah bas nikalne ka khayal aa raha hai... ki kyu tum baar baar mere paas aate hi khudko mujhse dur karke chale jate ho... bolo kya excuse du... ki mera husband mere paas sirf ek formality ki tarah...

N she breaks down n sits on the sofas edge sobbing...

Kartik was dumbstruck... Never in his wildest dream he had thought Naira was feeling all this while he was only trying to take care of her... and not stress her out...
Never had he thought she was going through such a whirlwind of emotions behind the smiling exterior... his Naira was in pain... emotionally...so much pain and he didnt know...
She felt neglected and he didnt know...he kept trying to keep her away from physical pain whilst giving her more emotional turmoil....

Kartik tries to get a hold over himself, seeing the sobbing Naira and went to hold Naira's hand...

She angrily jerks it off...

Kartik holds it again...and she jerks it away again...

Naira--- Enough Kartik...u dont have to do a favor on me...plssss...just leave from here...aa jaungi main apne aap...jao bas yahan se... mujhe tumhara koi aur ehsaan nhi.....

And her words were cut off my his lips on hers... he held her tight in his hold... she kept herself from reciprocating and then pushed him away...

Naira-- i said it once kartik...i am telling you again...i dont need your favor...i came close to you cos i love you and i wanted to feel loved and respected in your proximity...but u pushed me away....ab pls mujhpe favor mat karo...all i needed is ur love... not favors...

Kartik,now Angrily-- and after years of marriage this is wat u know of me... that i came close to u as a favor?? And not out of love?
The very reason I kept myself away from you is my love for you,Naira!! As much as I just wish to hug you tight and dissolve my fears in our love... to feel u close to my heart... I keep myself away bcos I have seen u suffer Naira... I have seen you bleed through ur pregnancy and smile through all of that... I have seen you in the hospital bed wincing, but smiling on seeing me... I have seen u trying to belittle the enormous pain you felt... I hav seen you go through soo much...and felt soo guilty at not being able to do anything abt it... I have felt it with you Naira... You were not the only one there... I dont come close to you...not bcos i dont want to... HELL!! I know how much I want to... But I am scared I ll hurt you... I am scared the wounds from ur pregnancy ,your labor might not have healed with all the stress we hav gone through and I'll hurt you... that again even if it hurts, like ur pregnancy hurted, You wont tell me.... that i might lose you to some complication.... that.... (and he is crying my now) that I might never be able to see u again... that.....